Depression Support Thread

Miroslav

EthelBloggs wrote: »

evening everyone :wave:

gawd I'm shattered!!! thursday is such a long day for me, I didn't get home til nearly 8pm!!

On the plus side, had a really yummy dinner.. there's a carribbean takeaway near where I get off the bus so I popped in and got curried mutton with rice and peas.. OH refused to eat his cos i told him it was goat (evil smily) so I've got it for tomorrow too

Got terrified today when told that there are only 5 more weeks of teaching and then it's............................ exams.............. :eek: ................ :eek:..............

and.... I have discovered that I love my new mobile.. finally! On the bus tonight I was able to watch two episodes of criminal minds that OH put on it for me :D:D:D made the journey go ever so fast, it does email and internet and all sorts but fekk knows how to do all that stuff, lmfao

Haven't read back cos I'm just tooo knackered! but hopefully I'll catch up over the weekend

big hugs, na night all xxxxxxxxxx

:wave: Goat?

You watch TV on your mobile? I've got a mobile........it rings and has sms - see, i'm not that out of date

:wave:

Stephb1986_2

i pretend to my parents! no one knows what im really feeling i keep it all inside i dont like to express my feelings to anyone some nights i just cry myself to sleep

Steph xxxx

EthelBloggs

Miroslav wrote: »

:wave: Goat?

You watch TV on your mobile? I've got a mobile........it rings and has sms - see, i'm not that out of date

:wave:

apparently I can subscribe to a mobile tv service but I've not investigated
the eps of criminal minds were mpg files and he put them on for me.. it's got 4gb of memory :eek: I've only had it three months so i should have learned how to use it by now but i haven't

and curried goat is gorgeous.. hard to get nowadays tho - very similar to lamb

Miroslav

Stephb1986 wrote: »

i pretend to my parents! no one knows what im really feeling i keep it all inside i dont like to express my feelings to anyone some nights i just cry myself to sleep

Steph xxxx

Well, it's easier, because people don't understand.

My flatmate is the only non official person that knows and even though she has depression/anxiety, she is so inward looking, that although she says she understands me, she always talks about herself non stop and very forcefully too. On the other hand, i'm always doing alot for her. Last year she helped a little, but it was soon thrown back in my face

This thread is the only place I get to 'talk' so to speak.

I don't cry myself to sleep. As soon as I feel a tear, I stop myself as I hate crying, but every night I go to bed I dream about the life I wish I had and that I had someone that cared.

The fact is, people don't want to know.

Hope you are okay this evening

EthelBloggs

Stephb1986 wrote: »

i pretend to my parents! no one knows what im really feeling i keep it all inside i dont like to express my feelings to anyone some nights i just cry myself to sleep

Steph xxxx

aww steph.. it's hard to share feelings I know.. I'm the same, then it all comes out in a big explosion and I get asked why I didn't say something sooner

Have you thought about keeping a journal, sometimes it's very cathartic to write everything down at the end of the day, sort of gets it out of your system before you go to sleep

Miroslav

EthelBloggs wrote: »

apparently I can subscribe to a mobile tv service but I've not investigated
the eps of criminal minds were mpg files and he put them on for me.. it's got 4gb of memory :eek: I've only had it three months so i should have learned how to use it by now but i haven't

and curried goat is gorgeous.. hard to get nowadays tho - very similar to lamb

I barely know how to use my Nokia which must be 1960's :rotfl: Good luck learning

Curried anything will finish me off. I'll stick to chicken breast

antronella

nite nite everyone x

Stephb1986_2

I dont keep one just incase it gets found and with the stuff i want to put in it, it might upset people if they found it. everyone just thinks im this happy smiley person but really inside im crying out for someone to love me as much as i love them. My family doesnt really take much notice in me my brother hates my guts my step sister is just jealous coz i have money and she's struggling, my mum and step dad are more bothered about the other two as my brother is nearly homeless coz he decided to sit on his backside for 6 months and not pay his mortgage, my step sister has a broken tap and something wrong with her car, if i mention anything about my car my step dad rolls his eyes so i go and check it over myself. I help around the house and work as hard as everyone else but i just get thrown to the side like i dont even matter. My OH doesnt really know how i feel as he's on nights and i dont want to burden him with my problems some of them are because of me and him are taking things slow at the moment.

phew ive finished sorry for me rambling

Steph xxx

shazrobo

evening all, can't sleep so thought i would come online for a bit.
i keep trying to put on a brave face, but cry so much when i am home, and sons in bed, feel so lonely

Miroslav

Stephb1986 wrote: »

I dont keep one just incase it gets found and with the stuff i want to put in it, it might upset people if they found it. everyone just thinks im this happy smiley person but really inside im crying out for someone to love me as much as i love them. My family doesnt really take much notice in me my brother hates my guts my step sister is just jealous coz i have money and she's struggling, my mum and step dad are more bothered about the other two as my brother is nearly homeless coz he decided to sit on his backside for 6 months and not pay his mortgage, my step sister has a broken tap and something wrong with her car, if i mention anything about my car my step dad rolls his eyes so i go and check it over myself. I help around the house and work as hard as everyone else but i just get thrown to the side like i dont even matter. My OH doesnt really know how i feel as he's on nights and i dont want to burden him with my problems some of them are because of me and him are taking things slow at the moment.

phew ive finished sorry for me rambling

Steph xxx

I don't keep anything written either, just incase anyone wants to use it against me!

Like yourself, everyone thinks i'm the joker and wouldn't even imagine I was depressed with my height/build and persona that I manage to keep up!

You sound like the black sheep, just like I was when I even bothered with my family.

Your partner should take an interest though. It's what relationships are about. If I was in a relationship (yeah right) and the person I was getting to know didn't tell me when she was down, i'd feel like I hadn't done enough to make her feel like she could talk to me.

I appreciate i'm not the average kind of bloke, but I feel anyone in a relationship should show willing in a relationship and you should be able to talk to him about important things.