Depression Support Thread

LouBlue

gillette147 wrote: »

Well I went and read the thread.
Misty mentioned me and if I'm Mr G then blue did. I feel like a right non-entity now :rotfl:

What are you talking about, man! Loads of peeps didn't get mentioned at all. 2 very important women mentioned you - be grateful.

Tiff_2

Hi guys!:hello:
Hoping everyone is safe and sound on this Fry-up-day!
Sorry I couldn't get back yesterday peeps but the belting headache grew up into a migraine and I spent most of the day asleep - as cats are wont to do anyway.
*For all new friends here - yes, I do know that I'm not a cat!*

To anyone with treatment, work, counselling, assessments, meetings, or who is poorly, has someone they love who's poorly, is struggling at the moment for whatever reason or anyone that just needs one, huge Tiffy hugs to you all. I know this time of year isn't all sweetness and light for everyone, but hang in there peeps - you're survivors!

A couple of Tiffy thoughts...
Many will be going into battle today amid the Christmas Chaos that is gift-buying!
Tiffy Tip: Go to the magic hole in the wall and take out cash. Leave all things plastic at home, (ladies' plastic chicken fillet bust enhancers and plastic joint replacements are exempt!) and shop only with what's in your purse/wallet. When it's gone, it's gone. You can't get into trouble with temptation and if you are questioning whether to buy something or not - walk on. If it was needed, there'd have been no hesitation. The 25th is a time of celebration but it will come and go and you don't need 12 months of extra debt in 2008.

Many of you will also be participating in the party season, be at work, with friends or family or with the photocopier !!!
Tiffy Tip: To anyone who is taking medication of any kind, please stay away from the dizzy water! It's very dangerous and I don't want to hear of anyone being seriously poorly due to this. You're too precious. Besides, if you stay sober, you can have much more fun watching the antics of your companions and that should give you enough blackmail ammo to keep [strike]Tiff[/strike] - ahem - you in smarties for a year!

And for anyone headed for their local grotto to sit on Santa's lap, two things...

1. If you're over 21, you ought to be ashamed of yourself! Hmmm......there again...!

and

2.




Have a good day everyone - safe journeys. I'm thinking of you all.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

shazrobo

mornin everyone, hope everyone is well. going for an aromatherapy massage this morning as a pampering treat, and to help me relax, both sons break up from school this afternoon, and i'll have them both at home for two weeks. i love them to bits but they are such hard work.
big hugs
shaz x

Tiff_2

Hi ilgd!:hello:How are you, sweetie? Good to hear from one of our resident guardian angels as always, hun.

quote=ilgd
hi tiff...you remind me of the cat on the bacadi advert, whos been on the razz and have returned after agood nite out to your home,....and dont take that the wrong way cos i hope you know that when you are away, we all miss you.xxquote=ilgd

lol...


.....

Well, you can't blame a Tiff for trying!
I hope all is well with you and yours angel. Take care.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

weymuffred!
How are you this morning hun?
I'd just like to say well done on posting angel and that I'm sorry you're having a really hard time right now. You'll find a whole host of amazing people here who are always willing to help and listen. You're most welcome here hun.

Okay as you may know I lost my dad to cancer earlier this year, but before he died he had been in and out of a hospice and we were constantly being told that "this was the time". So I have been a wreck for the past year and missed 3 medicals for my benefits, two I advised them I couldnt go, the third I didnt.
Because of this I had my income support stopped. At the time I asked them to look at the decision again but they didnt, so I was left being told I would have to appeal.
I didnt becuase i just wasnt up to fighting. At the start of November I was advised to go for a late appeal by a member of staff of dwp, as she said the decision was "heartless", I did and sent the form off, today I have had a reply saying that I cant have a late appeal, not sure of the reason why as I cant understand the writing.
I contacted the office dealing with it but was told I would have to wait until into the new year now before I can find out what the reason was.

I am completely angry,bitter and upset as one of the reasons given for having a late appeal is death. What was going to be a difficult christmas has now been totally wrecked becuase of the letter today.
I hope nobody minds me posting this but I didnt want to upset my wife.

Of course nobody minds you posting wmf! That's what we're her for.
I read your post hun and I thought that there were two different issues that you're wrestling with, in my humble opinion. There's the practical issue of your IS and there's the loss of your father. If we separate them hun, it can make them a whole lot easier to deal with.


Firstly, we have your benefits issue wmf. Right hun, this is a bit of a good news/bad news situation.
The bad news? It seems as though the whole counrtry shuts down for 2 weeks and it can be hard to get hold of people, especially when they don't want to be gotten hold of, when they're full of holiday fever. The DWP is closed on public holidays. Trying to find out what they define their opening hours are over the holidays, is a mission in itself. So an educated guess hun would lead me to believe that they will be open on Monday 24th December, Thursday 27th, Friday 28th, maybe Monday 31st (Bank Holiday?) and then business as usual from Wednesday 2nd January 2008.

Guys, you may want to jump over to the benefits board and see if the holiday hours have been posted there.

The good news? Your benefit problem is a practical issue angel - and there's always an answer to those. It may take time but they can be sorted and there are things you can do meantime.
- Taking all your paperwork with you hun, go down to the benefits office and try to apply for a Crisis Loan. Always worth a try angel. Tell them you need 'x' amount of money for food, heat, light etc. because there's been some confusion over your Income Support. You'll probably be in for a long wait there though, hun. It won't be a fortune by any means, but it can get you through a couple of days and then you can re-apply again, I think.

- You really need the expert assistance of your nearest CAB, who will be able to try and sort your benefit problem out hunnie. This is a link to help anyone to find their nearest CAB, the contact details and it will have their opening times as well:
http://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/index/getadvice.htm#txt_getadvice_header-Anchor-search

CAB are well versed with everything about DWP and benefits hun. Take all your paperwork with you angel and also a brief letter giving them permission to act on your behalf, just in case they don't have a form. They will contact DWP on your behalf wmf, and try and resolve this benefits issue for free. They'd have been able to help you with the wording on the form - and will.
I think it's absolutely disgraceful that they have treated you this way. With the loss of your father, you'd have been grieving and in an emotional turmoil and it would be quite understandable for you not to have your finger on the pulse of everything at that time. They should have looked at your claim again & I can't understand why they didn't. Did they give you a reason why it had to go to appeal instead, hun?
Have you been seeing your gp, or anyone, who could confirm that you were really struggling? I can quite understand that you weren't able to fight them at that point hun and I don't think it's unreasonable for you to have felt that way. At least the advisor who told you to ask for a late appeal had a heart.Make sure you write down the date, time, the person's name and the details of all phone conversations you have with DWP, hun, so you can refer to it if necessary. I'd call the office again for an explanation as to why they turned you down for a late appeal - they're not on holiday yet!

Don't make yourself feel any worse over this angel - I know it's easier said than done. You've got a plan for the practical benefits problem and you'll have done all you can with that, so if there's nothing much you can do until 2nd January, then it's not worth beating yourself up over hun.

Everything you're feeling is completely natural, wmf. I can understand your grief and pain angel. It was my Dad's funeral, two years ago yesterday (20th December), and as well as facing Christmas Day, also my birthday, just five days later, I was devastated. Don't make any definite plans hun - it can be too much pressure and my best advice is to take the holiday as it comes. You are quite within your rights to go upstairs, shut the bedroom door when everyone's out and have a damn good cry. Don't bottle everything up sweetheart, ok? Here are the opening hours and phone line number for the national bereavement charity CRUSE:

[FONT=Trebuchet MS, Tahoma]Day by Day Helpline[/FONT]
[FONT=Trebuchet MS, Tahoma]0844 477 9400 [/FONT]
Open Monday to Friday 9.30am to 5pm
or email us at: [EMAIL="helpline@cruse.org.uk"]helpline@cruse.org.uk[/EMAIL][EMAIL="helpline@cruse.org.uk"]
[/EMAIL]Christmas opening hours:
24th December - 9.30 to 1
25th Dec - closed
26th Dec - closed
27th Dec - 10 to 1
28th Dec - 10 to 1
31st Dec - closed
1st January - closed

Here is their website addy hun:

http://www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk/


For anyone who is really struggling, not only for the suicidal...

Phone us UK: 08457 90 90 90
ROI: 1850 60 90 90

Email us [EMAIL="jo@samaritans.org"]jo@samaritans.org[/EMAIL]

Write to us Chris, P.O. Box 9090

I know your Dad will be with you and your family angel, and somehow, you'll get through the holidays. If you start to feel really low hunnie, nip off and have a good cry. Make a certain time aside, just to remember him and talk to him.
All the love that he was to you, is still alive.

Also, I know I don't know you sweetheart, but try talking to your wife if you can. She may be sensing something's wrong, or worrying about it herself, and you could help each other through the hard parts. I'm sure she'd want you to open up to her. The whole family will be missing your Dad. This takes away the pressure of you putting on a brave face all the time, angel. Try and enjoy some of the time with your daughter - children can help us keep going when we don't think we can take any more.
You're not alone sweetheart, although I'm sure you feel you are. And don't forget, you can post here whenever you want to, ok?
I hope this has made some sense and been of some help hun. Try and take it all a day at a time.
I'm thinking of you.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tulip

:Hello: Everyone,

Morning! I was up at 7.15am today as I am so excited,I have my churchs christmas party this morning then going to my daycentre later for 1pm for a christmas raffle got to bank two cheques today as well so that has to be done

I hope you all have a lovely day,Juno I hope you are ok

*hugs* to those that need one


love and light,

Katie xxx

dawnylou

Hi all, sorry I don't seem to be around much.
I think counselling really takes it out of me?!?

Anyway I had my second session last night and today I am exhausted and would love to just lie on the couch all day playing pass the parcel on Oli and not have to get up for naything....BUT
I have to go to PO for missed parcel, brave a visit to Mr T, go to work to fill in some paperwork (seems pointless when I am due back on Sunday) and the doctors.
Oh and thanks Katie - I need to pay me £2 coins into the bank!
I am going to be so tired and motional tonight.

I hope everyone has a good day today.
And for all those who have to go Crimbo shopping today....


P.s can I just ask... a lot of youmention day centres, wood work etc etc - where do you find out about this type of thing and how much does it tend to cost?

BigMummaF

Morning Peeps! It's a bit of a pizza morning thus far

---

deep pan crispy----just how Good King Wensaslas likes 'em!:D Heard on the 7 0'clock weather that it's trying to snow in Zummerzet, so watch your petals Tulip!

A little glimmer of hope..my bil's wife has agreed to let me take her shopping:T Like most of us, she is a very determined, independant soul who does not ask for help. I can completely understand that, but tried to explain that she needs to take care of herself too if she wants to care for her husband. If she knocks herself out trying to be the superwoman expected at this time of year---as well as come to terms with very new, very raw, emotions of facing the new year with a terminally ill partner---she will only end up in the bed next to him in the hospital!
So we've hatched a plan:shhh: At least one, more likely both, of the wailing warblers[aka his sisters!] will be visiting him tomorrow. The wife will call me when she's [had enough]ready & I'll pick her up to go shopping, & bil will be in the company of family!
If it happens that we can't find a trolley so the staff suggest visiting the store's coffee shop:whistle: for a warming brew.......;)

Better go check my cupboards see if I've forgotten anything:undecided

Stay warm & Peaceful Minds folks. BMFx

gillette147

It's xmas in 30mins.
Work stops and I am piggin' out at the firms xmas lunch.
Big hugs to you all.
xxxx

Toothsmith

Miroslav wrote: »

Hopefully they won't fob me off, but if they do, not sure what I can do.

My dental practice is funny. Wants to see people every 4 months, not 6 and will only sort 1 thing at a time, even if 2 issues.

I then find out, they only get paid a set amount every 4 months before a new cycle starts and they can charge higher another fee again - all to do with NHS charges.

They are rubbish and taking the pee, but the only NHS practice in my town.

Ring up the PCT and speak to the dental person.

Report what is going on. Your name needn't be brought into any complaint, so the practice will not find out who raised the issues.

The PCT holds the NHS purse strings for the NHS practices now, and they can have a lot of 'influence' on how things are run.

Yes - one patient causing trouble could be de-registered, but the PCT looking closely at their working practises and threatening to withold funding or remove their contract would be very frightening to a practice that relies on NHS trade.