Depression Support Thread

Tiff_2

judderman62!
How are you hun?
You seem to have settled in nicely and I know that the angels here will have made you feel most welcome.:T

quote=judderman62;
Hey Tiff :wave:
How are you ?
Don't think, unless I missed it in which case appologies, you have said Hi yet - so Hi :hello:
Hello to you too - I'm fine thank you hun.
I'll reassure you first jd, that you were on my hit list for today - I wasn't ignoring you angel.;)
I've been trying to play catch up with posts and I tend to do it in chronological order. Ergo, if you have a problem on page 46, you'll be fine by page 49 and I'll post my offering on page 53! :rolleyes:

So to you jd, and to anyone else who hasn't been Tiffed yet ~ most would say count your blessings and make the most of your freedom while you can!:eek: :rotfl:

Tell me a bit about yourself (if you want to)
Judders/quote
Who - me?! Aren't you already depressed enough hun?:D
I thought everyone knew the Tale of Tiff?:rolleyes: A bit about Tiff then...what to say?

I'm 42 - years and inches around!:eek: - and living in sunny (?!) Warwickshire.:rolleyes:
My 17year old DS is about to start his final year at Stratford-upon-Avon College, studying for the National Diploma in Performing Arts, Musical Theatre. Never had any lessons as a child and I'm muchly proud of him!:T He's my only contribution towards sustaining the human race. I am divorced and there's no Mr.Tiff atm.

I have a penchant for things feline (as this is a thread for mental ill health, for anyone who's worried, I do know that I'm not a cat!;) ), writing, reading, music, genealogy, catnaps, people, psychology, theatre, even bingo once upon a time!:rolleyes: Oh,the humility!:o


I've had a few ups and downs in my life, as everyone does. I try to offer support and ideas when I can for what it's worth. No-one has to face anything alone, imho.

So there you go jd, a little bit of Tiffiness as requested. Not very exciting I'm afraid.:o Although, there was that time when... Is that the time?! Right, back to Tiffing!:D

Wishing you the best of what's left of this Thursday hun.
Oops, I nearly forgot -
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

tooties

hello everyone
yeah hubby was terrified thats why he told everyone!!!!
he didnt think things were that bad.
he is comming with me later to see the psychiatrist and i am terrified to be honest but perhaps husband will be able to give them a picture of what i am like when he is around. i have wasted the whole day on this computer so far not even hung out the laundry yet and its such a lovely day.
i have hated this house from the moment we moved into it 6 years ago, it came with my husbands job and i never got the chance to see it before moving in day, i just didnt bank on it being so small. buying a house is just not an option as although i earn good money when i am at work i am a nurse i have a feeling that taking the overdose the other night might just have shot my career to pieces. i mean who wants a nurse to look after you when she cant even look after herself?
my minature house i getting in a real state because i am not motivated to clean the place up in the slightest.
i am always permanently exhausted!
as much as my husband tries to get to grips with my feelings i sont understand them myself so how can he be expected to understand me when i dont?
why dont i want to eat proper meals? i live on sandwiches and sweets just dont have the motivation to cook or eat.
i sometimes make meals for husband and children but i never eat them i simply dont fancy it after cooking it.
sorry if im not making much sense just gotta write it all down.
can anyone answer these questions for me
and what am i supposed to do at the psychiatrist today?
tooties

Tiff_2

tooties!
Welcome to the family angel - I'm sure you've found a wealth of support and kindness already from everyone here.:T :A

Yesterday, 8:42 AM #1073 tooties;

hello everyone
thought i better pop on here and see if i could get some virtual support.
i got out of hospital yesterday after taking an overdose.
have to see the psychiatrist next week and GP is now restricting my anti depressents to a weeks supply at a time ( i took 40 of them apparently).
im supposed to be fine now!!!!/quote]

I'm sorry you felt driven to taking that step tootie but I'm really glad you failed.

Have you been having any input from the Mental Health Team? Do you have a CPN? Have you had mental ill health issues for long angel?
It's standard procedure in most cases like this, for you to see a psychiatrist. It's also understandable for them to now restrict your access to meds hun.:o


quote=tooties;(new post today...)
the hard part now is going to be facing everyone as my husband told everyone all about it.
Has this happened before tooties? Who has your husband told specifically hun?

I hope my thoughts on this may be a bit helpful to anyone in this situation. Posted without malice and not aimed at you tooties or anyone personally, ok?;) Just a few Tiffy thoughts...


- Taking your own life is the hardest thing to do. Your body, including your mind, will fight against it, as it has a natural reaction to preserve itself. This is why a lot of people get drunk first. But the problem with being drunk is that most times, people (thankfully!) don't get it right.


- Not many people think about who they want to find them after their attempt. Who would deserve that? Who won't be psychologically damaged by that?
I know that people are desperate when they take such measures and that the last thing they're thinking about is this.:o But please, if anyone feels like this, call your drs surgery or A&E and tell them it's an emergency - and also what you're thinking of doing. I guarantee they'd rather see you before than after!


- No-one, to my knowledge, though I'm no professional, thinks about what will happen if they fail?
There's a fair chance that you could damage yourself seriously physically and be left with more problems and pain than you had before, which is going to make your depression worse.

On top of all that, there'll be a whole range of services who might then get involved. And just what do you say to the family when you see them at visiting time?:o


my reasons for doing it are complex and im not even sure myself to be honest. im seeing the psychiatrist tomorrow so i am going to try and persuade my husband to come with me as i will do my usual everythings fine and i will put on by usual front and pretend everythings ok if i go by myself.
That's great hun.:T Please try and keep that insight. You should even make a point of telling the dr this angel. In fact, and I may have suggested this once or twice before (:rolleyes: ),why not pint off your posts and show them too the dr hun? It can save a lot of stress and time if you struggle to be honest or find the words.;)
Now I know you don't know me hun and I'm not a professional. I'd never hurt anyone's feelings. I'm going to go through your list here angel and break it down into Tiff-sized chunks so they're easier to manage - and they taste better!:rolleyes:


i had just had enough at the end of the day i hate the house i live in because its tiny.
Your surroundings are important, yet it's a house hun. Moves are possible on medical and social grounds with housing associations/councils. Visits to your council's website or a visit to CAB can help.

i hate my job (even though i am off sick at the moment)
Again understandable. Why do you hate your job? What do you do? How long have you been off sick angel?


i am skint as usual.
If you're off work hun, that's the norm.:o However, a visit to CAB will help if you have debt problems. They could contact the people you owe for you and negotiate smaller or delayed repayments. They'll also help you to budget.

If you have been off work for a long time hun, or are likely to be, you could be entitled to DLA - again CAB are the experts with this.


i am fat.
Hunnie - just be glad I don't have a webcam!:eek:
You, me and millions of others, are gastronomically challenged!:o;)


i hate my daughter inlaw and the way she neglects my grandchildren.
Is this an accurate view angel or because you're feeling so poorly? What does your son say? Are any other family members concerned? If it is so, please talk to someone about it.

i have however decided not to have my stepsons and my daughters in law etc in my house for the moment.
my three teenage sons at home give me the usual teenagers grief and that gets me down.
Ok hun - I give up - I'll jump with you!:eek: No wonder you're so low. Seriously hun, this house sounds way too over-crowded, especially if no-one helps you!

How many children do you have hun? You're doing the right thing by trying to look after your own needs first in getting rid of the crowd that descend upon you. How old are your teenage sons? What help do you get from them, if any? Out of everyone, who do you feel would listen to you the most and support your side?


i also desperately crave another child or too but unfortunately my husband cant have anymore and its really hard living with that.
Sweetheart, realistically, the last thing you need right now is more children. I'm sure you're very kind and loving hun, but this lot have just about finished you off and you want more?:o
I do understand angel that you want another child and I do respect that. But if it can't be, then it can't be sadly.

It sounds like what you really need is some tlc, some peace and quiet and some peace of mind too, with a huge helping of love and something that's going to return you to being someone that you're proud of and like!


i suppose it looks really trivial to be depressed by that amount of supposed problems in my life but they really get me down hence the overdose with 40 pills.
regards
tooties/quote
I hope you know that no-one here will judge you tooties. We're here to do all we can for you and you're more than welcome hun. The guys here really are amazing.:A

There's nothing trivial about depression and certainly not about your problems - your pain is just as important as everyone else's pain!;) People don't just od for silly things angel - it's important to them.
What I tried to do above hun was not to show you that your problems are trivial, but that there are answers to them. Not promising you an easy, short ride though angel - it's hard work fighting depression but so worth it.;)
Accept whatever help is offered by your drs. you sound like someone who's just been worn out looking after everyone else, and that can be fixed angel.;)


Sorry for the length of this hun. I do hope your appointment goes well. Just be totally honest sweetie, because that's the only way you'e going to get all the support you need to recover.

Try and put all the hating in the background a bit more sweetie and concentrate on recovering more. Meanwhile angel - post whenever you need to and keep us updated ok? Be kind to yourself hun, please.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Tooties - Angel, please try and focus on you for now ok? Stop looking at the snowball hun.
As for who would want a nurse who'd tried to od - you'd be surprised hun - any hospital, any psychiatric hospitals, CMHT, many possiblities so don't give up - you're not the first (nurse or not nurse) and you won't be the last sweetheart. In the future, you will, I'm sure, find your insight into depression a huge help. Good luck with today angel.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

tooties

hello Tiff and everyone else

An Update!!!!

Well dear husband and i went to the psychiatrist today and was completely honest and they are going to wean me off venlafaxine over the next 6 weeks and give me yet another anti depressent its the only one i havent been on CLOMIPRAMINE i cant believe this.
i am a severly depressed suicidal woman and they basically told me to pick up medicines from my gp and take them according to thier instructions for the next 6 weeks and then come back and see them!!!!!!
is it me or is this quite unreasonable!!!!!
i feel even worse now and 6 weeks with another useless anti depressent is too much to bear.
when i was in the hospital after the overdose i had to convince them that i wouldnt benefit from being an inpatient in a psychiatric hospital and that i would get good care from the local team.
i think i made a big mistake and that i maybe woudl be better off as an inpatient. Can anybody advise me????

tooties

hello again thought i had better give a bit of background information.
married for 20 years im 36. have three sons 17,18 and 19 who live at home with me and husband who i love dearly.
2 stepsons who have now left home and are married with families of their own.
i have beeen depressed for the last 18 years or so on and off.
received no real input from community mental health team who ever they are.
was visited once by a cpn about 5 years ago and he decided i was fine and has never been back.
i have never attempted suicide before, husband told everyone we know as he was so shocked and frightened.
my horrible house is tied to my husbands job so no chance of a move anywhere and no money to buy a house.
have been off work for around a month i expect to be off for several months. i dislike my job as i am a nurse and cant get a job in the field of nursing i want so i am stuck in geriatrics.
regards
tooties

BigMummaF

I went to Iceland & I DIDN'T buy any choccie raisins--:j me! Probably more to do with Mr T being a wee bit cheaper methinks....225g 69p Mr T, & 299g Iceland? But thanks again for the heads up.

How did folk get on today? Appointments kept? Housework ignored [my personal favourite]? Me time? Any plans for this evening?

House is on tonight, & I may watch d-o-g psychology on on channel or another. Of course I'll be reading MSE again at some time. Ain't life grand...I just don't know how I fit it all in......

Peaceful Minds folks. BMFx

juno

tooties wrote: »

hello Tiff and everyone else

An Update!!!!

Well dear husband and i went to the psychiatrist today and was completely honest and they are going to wean me off venlafaxine over the next 6 weeks and give me yet another anti depressent its the only one i havent been on CLOMIPRAMINE i cant believe this.
i am a severly depressed suicidal woman and they basically told me to pick up medicines from my gp and take them according to thier instructions for the next 6 weeks and then come back and see them!!!!!!
is it me or is this quite unreasonable!!!!!
i feel even worse now and 6 weeks with another useless anti depressent is too much to bear.
when i was in the hospital after the overdose i had to convince them that i wouldnt benefit from being an inpatient in a psychiatric hospital and that i would get good care from the local team.
i think i made a big mistake and that i maybe woudl be better off as an inpatient. Can anybody advise me????

:hug:

Can you go and see you GP asap and explain your worries? Or would it be possible to make another appointment to see the psychiatrist? I know what it's like; when you see them you can just agree with anything they say even if it's not what's best for you!

Your GP should have some emergency appointments so try and get it sorted tomorrow.

BigMummaF

Ooops did it again. Sorry tooties--I don't mean to make light of your predicament but our posts crossed in the ether.

Just a thought, but if you've reached rock bottom then there really is only one way left......up. Maybe give yourself a bit of time to let your brain wander--the family are old enough to fend for themselves, & your hubby sounds very supportive, so go wallow!

I fully recognise the eating pattern, I've been living that way for years even though I know I want to change. Perhaps we could devise our own menu plans to include plenty of chocolate raisins for Andi & I, catnip for Tiff..... oooh & don't forget the cake for Tulip!

To be serious for a mo, the biggest advantage of this thread is how you can call on the first hand experiences of so many who are willing to help SO USE US ok?

Preaching over.:wave:

andipandi_2

hi tooties,me thinks you need to find out whether you are clinically depressed or suffering from a reactive type of depression,reading your posts you are obviously suffering considerably.

Have you had any forms of therapy,i had 5 1/2 years of therapy(2001 onwards) before my depression became less of an issue with regard to suicidal intent,try to work on accepting your depression rather than fighting it,this is what really helped me,(i have posted on this thread about it and dr tiff has dissected my post and offered her views also,)

i still get blackly depressed but after accepting my depression(weird thing though i don't know how i did it or made the change,that bit i cannot explain)
instead of being chronically depressed for weeks or months now it is a day or two now and then.

Regards
Andy