Reeling from the Reality Check

PlymouthDad · 19 February 2014 at 9:49PM

Hi wanted to say hey and well done in all you have achieved so far. I am i the same boat as you debt wise and have decided on using stephange for a dmp. Im not going to start mine yet as i need to swap bank accounts and also change a joint to a solo,but have contacted my creditors using a template from puzzcat stating i can only make token payments whilst stepchange sort my dmp. I too am worried/anxious/scared and cant wait to be 6 months down the line and making regular paymebts whst staying in my agreed budget.

Historybuff · 20 February 2014 at 9:17AM

Hi mf,
This is just me. I am responsible for all these payments. Mortgage full. Food...I allowed for £70 per week. Council tax is ten months. Phone is part of phone, internet, tv package £42 per month. I got this down from £75 that I was paying. Clothing is a guess and could be lowered. Petrol is high because I have a 36 mile round trip every day to work. I generally use a full tank each week @ around £50 to £60. Pets. Two dogs and the insurance is £20 + for each one. Can't move it or else current medieval conditions won't be covered. Buildings insurance in with contents. Got a good deal. Took out more mortgage so need additional life assurance. Mortgage rate high because got locked in to a ten year fixed rate when rates were high! Was a good deal at the time, now not so.

So I'll have another look and adjust some of the figures n see how that looks. Am definitely up for cutting as much costs as possible to pay more off. The holidays, clothes, entertainment budgets were all guesses. Can't cut it all...need a bit of slack!
Plymouth dad stay in touch. Our situations sound similar. We could maybe be a support to each other? Im just waiting on the joint to sole decision before going forward with DMP. X

PlymouthDad · 20 February 2014 at 9:40AM

Morning Hb,

Yes would love to stay in tough. Ive kind of been at the start of a Light bulb moment before (not a DMP though) and find I fizzle out after the initial stage as it gets harder to keep foucused, buit hopefully going the DMP route will keep us going. I'm going into town today to get the forms for LLoyds and get me off the joint account.

Keep smiling....the sun is out!

Historybuff · 20 February 2014 at 4:33PM

Thanks PlymouthDad,
Good luck with the forms and DMP.
I'm just waiting for tomorrow when my wages hit the bank account, so I can go out and get some FOOD! One good thing is that we are getting to the end of the freezer stock. I was so pleased to find a couple of boxes of chicken nibbles and potato wedges today for tonight's tea! All that stuff that has been hanging around has now been eaten, but, my goodness, it's hit home not being able to go and pick up a pile of stuff from the supermarket when you want to.
Well today I posted off the mortgage endowment letter to try to claim for a mis sold policy. Might be too late, but thought it was worth a shot.
I also rang the mortgage people to see what the redemption figure would be to try to get a better deal than our 5.18% fixed. It would potentially save a couple of grand in the two and a half years it's got left to run, so could be worth doing. Something else to consider.
My new bank account details have arrived, so this month once the DD payments have been taken out the old bank I will transfer them to the new one. I'm going to do them as they get paid out because I thought it would give plenty of time to get sorted out, so no payments get missed. Didn't do the bank led switch as I wanted to stay in control of what went over when. Right, so mind set is still focused...I will be so pleased once I can start seeing the totals going down.

Historybuff · 21 February 2014 at 3:23PM

Well it seems that today is the day...I had to phone one of my CCs because the interest added has taken the balance over the credit limit. I decided to talk to them about struggling to make payments, which has resulted in me sending them my budget and offer of monthly payment to them. Hope I've done the right thing. Seems like I'm managing my own DMP then.
I'm now waiting to see what their response is. The guy I spoke to said he would try to get an agreement on freezing interest and taking lower payments sorted today. Hope he is telling the truth. I'm now a nervous wreck not knowing if I've done the right thing. Eek!

there_is_a_light_2 · 21 February 2014 at 4:15PM

Hi HB, just caught up on your diary and felt like I was reading my own story from 8 months ago, so just wanted to drop by and offer my support. You sound like a very positive can-do person and I am sure with help and support you can get through this.

Your reasons for getting into debt are totally selfless, sounds like you have only ever wanted the best for your family, and well done for tackling this head on now.

Regards your OH - this really struck a chord with me too. I remember so clearly the day 8 months ago when I sat my OH down and explained our situation. It helped that by that time, I had a plan in place and could show him that with careful budgeting we could still lead an OK life but would have to plan and budget for any fun things. He was surprisingly very supportive and in some way relieved as he knew I had been stressing about money for so long, he was just happy that we could keep the house, pay the bills, eat and go to the odd footy match. Since then, he is totally on board especially with food budgeting (he moaned at me the other day because I went to the co-op instead of Aldi).

I also took the very good advice of Stepchange. I'll never forget the feeling of relief after speaking to them, after all attempts at reconciliation had failed, with all credit cards up to their limit and resorting to emptying the change jar to get us through the week. How many times that week did I say to the people on the till 'you don't mind if I get rid of a bit of change do you' as I emptied the pennies out.

Now I am 6 months into an IVA which was the best option for me and one which I took for the sake of my health, sanity and family.

Changing bank accounts was fairly stressful I remember, but I used it as an opportunity to speak to all companies I had DDs with and managed to negotiate savings on most of them at the same time.

I must say, even though money is tight each month and I'm desperately trying to build up an emergency pot, it is the best thing I could have done so please don't despair if you get any set backs, it's a long journey with many bumps on the road, but it is one worth taking.

Hope the ebay sales go well and good luck, will stay in touch.

Historybuff · 21 February 2014 at 7:43PM

Thanks so much there is a light,
It's so good to hear from other people in the same boat who are further along with things. Glad to hear your solution is working for you, but an IVA wouldn't work for me because of my job.
I heard back from the CC guy just now and he has agreed to my payment offer and has frozen all interest and charges on the account from today to be reviewed in six months. I feel like a massive weight has lifted! I am now galvanised to approach the other creditors, which I will do on Monday. Glad I've decided to do it myself. Hope the others are as accommodating.
It was payday today, so I've been able to stock up the food cupboards...finally! I am going to try to get us to survive on £45 per week, so we can get through the month on budget. Today's bill was £81, which is for two weeks worth. I will just have to stock up on bread, milk and a few veg...£9 and any cash I make at Sunday's carboot sale will have to see me through till a week on Friday. Wish me luck!

there_is_a_light_2 · 21 February 2014 at 10:33PM

Well done on the CC, that must be such a relief. I remember when I first started getting calls from creditors being surprised at how human and sympathetic they were.

I think if I'd spent more time on this forum earlier I would have felt better equipped to tackle the debts myself one by one, and with hindsight I wish I'd at least given it a go. Even though the IVA felt like the only option I had at the time, I sometimes feel like its kind of a cop-out and I feel in awe of some of the inspirational stories on here of people managing it on their own.

Good luck with your other creditors and hope the situation with OH bank account gets resolved. I opened two basic bank accounts, everything goes in and out of the main one - the other has been sat largely empty apart from the odd transfer in and out just in case they close it down due to inactivity! From this month I am starting using the other one for things that have been budgeted for (school meals, travel, petrol, school trips, car fund). Hoping this gets me organised as I desperately need to start putting money aside (and not dipping into) for things like the car and school trips.

Have a good weekend

in_need_of_direction · 22 February 2014 at 4:18PM

Maybe this is a really stupid question but why are you responsible for all the bills?

Historybuff · 23 February 2014 at 12:14AM

It's because I'm the one that earns the money now. OH was made redundant and is now semi retired. That's how the debts got so big...me trying to keep things going the same for the last five years as when he was working full time. His money just about covers some home and car maintenance, his phone, the rent on his garage and his hobbies.