who has secret savings????

Prothet_of_Doom

When my sister's ex husband went through divorce proceedings my sisters legal advisor found he had $20K stashed away, and the court in Dayton, gave him 14 days to list other hidden assets or potentially go to prison. He "Found" an additional $200K he'd forgotten to put down.

Basically he put away $1000 every month over the time they were married without telling her.

nicke20

When my wife filed for divorce i found out by looking back through our joint bank account that in the previous 2 years she had taken £16000.00 out of cashpoints (yes i know i should have spotted it, but we where never close to overdrawn so i didnt worry) anyway once the cash is out and hidden, forget it its gone!!

BUT

if its found and wasnt declared your in the doo doo

Biggles

This is a rather sad thread in its way.

I'm not criticising any individual, just wondering what the general pattern of answers says about our society, I guess.

Before you ask, we had everything in joint accounts (except where tax-advantageous, of course) and shared it all.

somethingcorporate

I share everything 100% with my wife but it does always make us feel guilty because even though we earn similar amounts it always feels like we are spending someone else's money. It makes us pretty tight!

I do like the idea of a secret stash although I wouldn't go for it, I'd like my wife to be able to trust me, even if it is for something that could be quite positive (or negative if it is your running away fund!).

traineepensioner

I have a little stash that I think my other half doesn't know about....and she has a little stash that she thinks I don't know about

Melaniep101

pelirocco wrote: »

I assume you would be quite happy for him to have a secret running away savings plan too?

Off course the truth is if you were ever to divorce you would have to declare your savings ( as I understand it )

He saves money separately too, and I don't question it, or what he is saving it for.

I don't think there is anything wrong in having savings that my husband doesn't know about, for all he knows, I could be spending my money on shoes and handbags.

I did state that I had no plans to run away, but this is a security blanket for me. And yes, I know that should we divorce, I would have to declare my savings.

latecomer

I find the idea of secret savings a little odd TBH if you are in a long term relationship - you either trust the other person or you dont.

OH and I earn about the same and have had a joint credit card pretty much since we've been together. We are both careful with money although not overly so (at least OH isn't - I'm tight ) and neither of us is particularly materialistic.

I have some shares in a previous employer that OH keeps forgetting about - is that the same thing

p00hsticks

Biggles wrote: »

Before you ask, we had everything in joint accounts (except where tax-advantageous, of course) and shared it all.

Did you never want to surprise your other half with a weekend away or an extra special birthday present and not want them to know how much it cost ? And if so, how did you manage it using only a shared bank account ?

I have a joint account with my OH that we both pay into but we also have our own individual accounts - as westy says, I think it's important that we all have access toa bit of money that we can spend as we like without being queried on it.

My OH has recently been made reduundant - at the moment he continues to pay into our joint account using his redundancy money and JSA. If and when this runs out, if he has not got another job, as 'breadwinner' I will then make sure that he always has something in his own account that he can spend as he wishes (and buy me presents with ! :-) ).

Biggles

p00hsticks wrote: »

Did you never want to surprise your other half with a weekend away or an extra special birthday present

Absolutely, and did so frequently.

and not want them to know how much it cost ?

Why, when it's our money, would I not want her to know how much it cost us? We were both paying for it. The surprise was what counted. Or, to put it an the manner of the well-known phrase, "It's the thought that counts".

bugbyte_2

Before I got married to my OH we had a chat about money. Her mum and dad split all the bills and had separate accounts. They appeared quite resentful of each other as her dad always had more to spend on himself. I really did not want this, so I argued for a joint approach where whatever I, or she earns is joint. We can spend what we want, but out of respect anything out of the ordinary over £50 unless it is a surprise we discuss if we can afford it first.