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How much is enough 'spending money' for a month?

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  • Kayalana99
    Kayalana99 Posts: 3,626 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker I've been Money Tipped!
    Gillyx wrote: »
    R.e the drinking, is he doing it to escape? Does he dislike his job or are there other stresses in his life? It's very easy as tolerance levels go up, for people to start drinking more and more. I speak from experience.


    I see your points their, we will take it as it comes I guess I would always put the kids(17month/4month) first.

    No to all, he literally does it because he enjoys drinking, as he calls it its his hobby, he is subscribed to some beer festival thing, knows everything about beer/ales etc you can imagine loves to try new ones etc etc.

    His Dad is the same - hence where he got it from, but his Dad and Mum have had no end of problems because she doesn't agree with it and is tea total ...yet he is still drinking and they are still arguing...20 years later.. I know its not normal to drink that much (I have told him this) but he has grown up with it and its normal to him.
    People don't know what they want until you show them.
  • Gloomendoom
    Gloomendoom Posts: 16,551 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    In his defence, he could just be drinking beer for no other reason than it tastes nice.

    I like beer, I brew my own (very MSE), and I drink it because I like it, not because I am stressed or unhappy.
  • mouche
    mouche Posts: 902 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    OH and I get £90 'pocket money' per month (and we are reasonably high earners) and we struggle to spend it! In fact we both save from it so that if we want something more expensive, we can. E.g. OH just bought himself a £100 pair of boots from his pocket money savings.

    True, we don't drink much and have no expensive hobbies so we may be exceptions. I think it's worth thinking about what others have said about the upcoming change in your circumstances though - getting used to spending £200 a month will be hard to get un-used to when the income goes down.
    Mortgage (original/ current):193,000 (23/09/11)/ £102,500 (07/11/2019)
    2019 Challenges: Make £300 a month: £9.71/£300 (January)
  • paulineb_2
    paulineb_2 Posts: 6,489 Forumite
    In his defence, he could just be drinking beer for no other reason than it tastes nice.

    I like beer, I brew my own (very MSE), and I drink it because I like it, not because I am stressed or unhappy.

    Of course, but hes drinking way too much. Unless its low alcohol lager it looks like hes drinking 4 times as much as the recommended alcohol units he should be having in a week.

    Hes looking at possible health problems in the future if he doesnt make an attempt to cut down.
  • Gloomendoom
    Gloomendoom Posts: 16,551 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    paulineb wrote: »
    Of course, but hes drinking way too much. Unless its low alcohol lager it looks like hes drinking 4 times as much as the recommended alcohol units he should be having in a week.

    Hes looking at possible health problems in the future if he doesnt make an attempt to cut down.

    I don't disagree with that.

    I wonder how big his tummy is. :p
  • Person_one
    Person_one Posts: 28,884 Forumite
    Tenth Anniversary 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    In his defence, he could just be drinking beer for no other reason than it tastes nice.

    I like beer, I brew my own (very MSE), and I drink it because I like it, not because I am stressed or unhappy.

    Unfortunately, your liver and your stomach don't care why you are drinking it.
  • Kayalana99
    Kayalana99 Posts: 3,626 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker I've been Money Tipped!
    I don't disagree with that.

    I wonder how big his tummy is. :p
    Kayalana99 wrote: »

    I don't know how he does it, he does take a packed lunch spends £2-3 quid on breakfast at the local van round from work...goes down the shop and buys extras and yet he is stick thin despite all the drinking and snacking !!


    I'm putting it down to high metabolism (You should see his dads tummy give him a few more years to catch up :p)
    People don't know what they want until you show them.
  • Kayalana99 wrote: »

    No to all, he literally does it because he enjoys drinking, as he calls it its his hobby,

    There's your problem right there! Drinking is not a hobby!!

    As others have said, people build up a tolerance to drink and they think because they're not getting rat arsed every night, then they don't have a drink problem.

    How would he cope if he had to go without it even for just one night?
  • Gloomendoom
    Gloomendoom Posts: 16,551 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    There's your problem right there! Drinking is not a hobby!!

    It can be. I would say that it's one of mine, yet I don't hit the magic '4' on Person One's chart.
  • paulineb_2
    paulineb_2 Posts: 6,489 Forumite
    I think to be blunt, if he doesnt look at reducing his alcohol intake you could be looking at problems within your relationship particularly as your kids get older and want to do more things as a family.

    I personally made the decision to stop drinking because even though I wasnt always drinking very much, it had become a habit. Many people who have no problems with alcohol can take or leave it, can go a couple of days without a drink every week and can go a week or two at a time without having any alcohol.

    If he were having 1 can a night, it would still be a habit, but one that would potentially cause him less problems with his health.

    You sound understanding but just because this is the way its always been for his mum and dad, doesnt mean its got to be the way its to be for you and him.
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