Mums, do you make time for yourself?

YORKSHIRELASS

I have been thinking recently that I get very little time for myself and I should do something about it.

My life is probably similar to a lot of other Mums, I work 25 hours a week (2 jobs), care for a son with health issues, have another teenager, do voluntary work and do all the associated domestic stuff that comes with a family. I love being busy and have a lot to be thankful for but get very little time for myself.

I keep thinking that I should schedule in some time to do something that I really want to do - preferably out of the house. I have two afternoons a week when I dont do paid work and keep thinking that even if I made time once a fortnight it would be something. Even my weekends are taken up with ferrying the kids about, doing housework and doing things for other people.

So what do you do? Do you actually set time aside in your week for yourself or do you just snatch a bit of "me time" when you can. I am not sure whether I want to join a structured activity or just make a space in my diary to just do whatever I feel like.

masonsmum

I dont do anything without my family, I come in from work make the next days sandwiches, then dinner, bath and bedtime routine then the most time I get is half an hour in the bath at night once kids are in bed.

To be honest thats my own choice though I like my nights in after work especially in the winter months, in the summer we usually go a walk/play in the garden with kids after dinner. At the weekends its always family time whether it be days away or a lazy movie/pyjama day! x

karren

I didn't but last year I sort of burnt out so now I try doing something for me daily if I can, even if it's a bath or reading a chapter in a book, try mindfulness x

Louise84

Nope no time here as a mum of 3 little ones. My choice though and I dont know what to do with myself when I have no children! sad but true

mummynorth

Its a fact that you should always set time for yourself. It can help to de-stress you and of course gives you more things to talk about with your husband. It keeps the relationship alive. I spend every Thursday afternoon going to a Zumba class and then have a coffee with my friends afterwards. It's not a lot, but it makes a massive difference to me and my sanity.

dizziblonde

I've got two under 2... what's time?!? Seriously though - if I'm really feeling the pressure then my husband will take over when he gets in from work so I can just run out to Costa or somewhere and go grab a coffee and a bit of a sanity break.

DigForVictory

Good Gods yes!

When they were littler it was easier - I could send husband into supermarket with cutie and last week's till chit whilst just fed baby snoozed beside me in the car as I read the next twenty minutes of Harry Potter! (Father & small child a devastating combo for getting supermarket help! Saved me a packet as he was released with all the essentials on the list & all the relevant promotions!)

Now, they're in school & I work full time while he's the SAHP. Over that threshold I'm the driver, tech troubleshooter, wife, mother etc so time to myself is trickier - when am I going to see the lads if not when I get home? So I make little gaps between work & going home to see friends for a coffee & a laugh, and it's lovely.

But even if you choose to stay home with a brood, you do still need a few minutes now & then & if that means hiding on the loo with a book (& a pinger), so be it!

dingdongsaving

I sometimes find it's the tiniest things...

I work full time as a teacher. Leaving at 7 if my hubby can do the school run or 8 if I have to and rushing home so I get a nice evening with my family (always try to be home by 5)...but the cost of that is I bring home about 2 hours of school work every night (marking, assessment, sorting resources, planning etc.) I do that once my son's in bed.

I never leave school work for the weekends though...just the house clean and food shop.

Things I slip in daily to feel like my real family and school family don't rule my entire life are:

*Getting up at 5:30 instead of 6 means I can have 30 minutes of the internet or tv with a cuppa before the madness begins (or anyone else is awake!)

*Using my school lunch clubs to allow a hobby...running club 1 day and sewing club another)

*Enjoying a jog with hubby and dogs and our son on his bike keeping our pace up.

*Going to an exercise class every few weeks (totally alone!)

*Having 1 nice loooooong bath with a book or dvd on my laptop (propped on the laundry hamper beside me!) each week or two. I 'book' this with my hubby so he knows it's coming once I've made tea and washed up.

*Keeping the family enjoying things we can all do - long dog walks, riding our bikes together, playing in the garden while I join in/wash the cars/do a bit of gardening...

All very old school but I rarely feel like I need any more time and it only costs £4.50 a time for the exercise class when I choose that.

balletshoes

When my daughter was a toddler/at primary school my OH and I worked kind of opposite shifts, so as a result I didn't have any "me" time in the week, as OH was always working in the evenings. I got my time at the weekend though, sometimes it would be family time, but sometimes I'd get out and window-shop, go for a coffee with a friend etc.

My DD is at high school now, she doesn't do quite as many organised activities/clubs as she used to, and we're on a direct bus route into town, so I'm not required for taxi/babysitting duty as much as I used to be. So now I get more "me" time - I'm thinking of taking up swimming and community choir again, both things I used to enjoy doing before becoming Mum.

YORKSHIRELASS

Some interesting stuff there. I have decided that I do too much and need to say no a bit more. I am going to give up one of my voluntary job at the end of this financial year and just keep the one that I really enjoy.

What I really crave is a little time alone, without friends, family or work colleagues. That may sound selfish but I feel thats what I am lacking. Just a little space to think things through and be by myself.

Its encouraging that other people do make time for themselves though.

WantToBeSE

Yes I do!

I think its seen to be very 'perfect' to be constantly doing stuff for everyone else and having no time for yourself.

I never used to, but for the last 8 or so months, I have been taking 1 afternoon a week to do something for me. I don't do much, have a bath, do my nails, read a book, go shopping, have a nap, but I love it