I was supposed to be getting married in 6 months..

Seanymph

I don't think he should have to pay the bills if he doesn't live there - and if they are in your name then I can't see how you can make him.

I'm sorry that this has happened to you, is there any chance that he will change his mind?

kacie

I'm sorry to hear this, no advice but I understand the pain of the relationship ending when you are due to be getting married soon. Mine ended a few months ago, and I still haven't got around to deciding what I want to do with my bought and paid for wedding dress.

LandyAndy

Polmop wrote: »

But there is nothing you can do if you lose your keys!!!. You have to change the locks

Stupid advice. Don't do this. While it is his house as well he can get a locksmith to break in and change the locks again. This is not the way to go.

C_Mababejive

How can you "throw him out" of his own house? That would be illegal and a possible assault wouldnt it?

LandyAndy

C_Mababejive wrote: »

How can you "throw him out" of his own house? That would be illegal and a possible assault wouldnt it?

It certainly isn't 'enforceable'.

valk_scot

I-Heart-Me wrote: »

Yeah I am dealing with the shock at the same time as trying to protect myself. I have thrown him and all his stuff out but I've read I can't legally change the locks so I am scared to leave the house in case he comes back and takes stuff

Change the locks anyway. Might not be 100% legal at this point but you're going to have to doo it soon anyway and you can always plead ignorance. If he wants access to get other things that belong to him I'd cooperate with this but have your dad or a friend there with you at the time.

aileth

Seanymph wrote: »

I don't think he should have to pay the bills if he doesn't live there - and if they are in your name then I can't see how you can make him.

I'm sorry that this has happened to you, is there any chance that he will change his mind?

Change his mind about leaving? I interpreted it that OP threw him out after she found out he had an affair and that he had expressed doubts before this, but they hadn't separated.

itsanne

Seanymph wrote: »

I'm sorry that this has happened to you, is there any chance that he will change his mind?

Why on earth would the OP want to take him back if he did?

Upsetting as it is just now, she's well shot of him and ultimately far better off than if this had happened after the wedding.

itsanne

I-Heart-Me wrote: »

I jointly own our house with an accountancy company. My dad is going to pay the £5k to satisfy the accountancy & Bankrupcy Scotland and that will allow the house to be transferred into my dads name jointly with mine as long as the mortgage company agree.
Currently he is still on the joint mortgage.

Does this have any bearing on changing the locks?


OP, will the change be done with or without your ex's agreement? I'm assuming he would have to agree. The reason for the question is that if he is in agreement with it, it seems unlikely that he would be trying to return to the house anyway so you wouldn't need to worry.

It's great that your father is willing to help and impressive that you're sorting things so quickly at such a horrible time. It might be more difficult, but wouldn't a clean financial break be easier in the long run? It's difficult to see how, given his previous finances and new situation re court, you'd be able to force your ex to pay up even if CAB are telling you he is liable (which sounds unlikely given that the bills are in your name and you are not married).

Good luck.

paulineb_2

Get advice, this is what happens when posts like this go up, you get people saying, change the locks, dont change the locks, get proper legal advice on what your next steps should be.