Is it possible to stop being a moaner?

GwylimT

I don't understand moaners really, why waste your life moaning when you could be doing something about your problems/niggles.

Arlandria606

HPoirot wrote: »

What is the point of it all, is moaning so enjoyable?

No, it's not. But sometimes, something is annoying enough to need to do something about it. If there's nothing you can actually do, sometimes telling someone that it happened, how you felt about it, and having them say "yeah, that sucks, what a <insert expletive here>. Ah well, let's put dinner on, <insert mutually enjoyable activity here>, and improve the day" helps.

pukkamum wrote: »

My husband could moan for england, he loves it and once he's on one it can go on forever.
I have to stop him and usualy do so by talking about my friend who's little girl is battling leukaemia or my other friend who's little girl has just had a major hip op.
It usually stops him in his tracks.

I just wanted to say that having a big, ongoing, serious problem like that doesn't mean that the little annoyances don't matter. In my experience, if the big thing is happening to you, or someone close enough to you to need your support, (or even both at the same time,) it can make the little things even harder to deal with and a good moan even more therapeutic. Sometimes it's too hard to talk about the big stuff, so you focus on the little things instead.

Not saying that perspective isn't a good thing - just that playing "my problem's bigger than your problem" isn't always helpful.

marisco_2

This probably wont be a popular point of view but I cant bare people who moan. All that monotone droaning on and negativity makes me immediately zone out and not wish to give them the time of day. It grates on me like the sound of a toddler whinging and whining.

If something is niggling someone they should talk it out with the person most likely to listen well, and be willing to give a fuller perspective to the situation. Approaching them in a calm and reasoned manner will get a far better response.

meritaten

I think what you really miss is your mum. you got into the habit of phoning her for a moan then you would both have a laugh and you felt better! the problem is where your mum didn't take you seriously and knew you just wanted to vent and then have a laugh about it - your OH DOES take you seriously and wants to fix things for you!

so come on here and vent away! in fact I think we should have a 'dedicated moan thread' - where people can come and just vent away without a huge discussion afterwards!
Perhaps its a female thing - but sometimes I just want to rant and when OH insists on offering 'solutions' I could scream! I don't want 'solutions' I want to rant! just to get it off my chest - I can see the funny side of it myself later once its out there!