The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

shaggydoo

February:

= 7 Days AF

= 14 days AF

= 21 days AF
= 28 days AF

= 29 days AF

= target achieved


Alcohol Free Days

Alex

Barny1979

CathyBird /15

CountingPenniesClaire /23

DansMam

DebJay /29

DizzyImp /25

Doshwaster

Effyb4 /14

[Deleted User]

Gien

Honey Bear /29

HR_money

JHiggins

Jjef

JulieTheMuse

Lincs

Mackeroo

Maggie /15

Maman /10

Mari

NewMe /20

PenniesFromHeaven

Piggles /18

Poppety

Pricey

Satchmo /29

SandyPan

Shaggy /17
SmallHoldingSister

Smiley_77 /29

StuPotStu

WBF /10

Yellowmonkey /15

Alcohol Low Days

Shaggy /21




Everyone Welcome! It's never too late to join....

Please highlight your AFDs in Red

Don't hesitate to let me know if I've made a mistake!

shaggydoo

Roll up, Roll up. A New Month, A New Challenge.

SET YOUR

29 days up for grabs!

Everyone Welcome!!!

Dizzy_Imp

Sorry to read your post SPS. Been there with the feeling of guilt many times myself and also with the "undercover" top ups and shots that I hid from potential witnesses. {{{BIG HUGS}}}

I've never been to an AA meeting. I'm hopeful that my drinking didn't impact enough on other people that they think I should've asked for help. I've not been violent when drunk, just giggly and easily led, which has led to several awkward situations :eek: but I do accept that I can and do often drink a lot of alcohol, more than is safe and definitely more than is socially "normal".

I'm doing Dry January and if I'm honest, I've really struggled, but I've enlisted the support of family and friends. My DH was dismissive to start with, but now is encouraging me to get the full 31 days alcohol free and I've just had a major break through in my way of thinking about drink and cancelled my subscription to a wine club that I was clinging on to. DH will be pleased. I feel strangely sad, as if I'm losing a friend, but I know that in reality I'm just ridding myself of the little devil on my shoulder telling me I'll always have another case of wine on order to look forward to. Plus, more money in my bank, which is always a bonus...

Anyway, my point is, don't give up trying. Each little victory (and blip) is a step on this difficult journey. X

maggiesoup1

Think of the glorious 10 AF days you gave your liver

I'm now 15 dry days (not in a row) the first time in years and disappointed that I still have bags under my eyes .... as if years of abuse is going to disappear in one month!!!

We all have blips Stu, and I'm sure I will come off the Sun-Thurs wagon on many occasions in the future, but I just have to remind myself that I can do it if I get into the right frame of mind.

Good luck for the rest of the week.

piggles1

maman wrote: »

As a cutter down I find it hard to understand why you're so hard on yourself when you've had a drink when you're not planning to give up. Now you've set a target for February, would it not work to tell yourself that you'll be delighted if you achieve that and any more will be a bonus? Or what about mapping out the AF days so you know which days you plan to have a drink so that, on those days, you'll be kinder to yourself. I am trying to understand, honest;).

thanks maman I wasn't hard on myself and it was understandable I had too much on the funeral day.

But having two AFDs and then having nigh on a bottle of wine the next day (which is what I'm up to again now) isn't what I was aiming for at all.

It is good to look at the total at the end of the month and see how many days I didn't drink. Just got to work on the ones where I do!

cathybird wrote: »

Piggles, all I can say is well done you for getting through the funeral more or less intact - funerals can be such difficult occasions and you seem to have done incredibly well to me. All any of us can do anyway is one day at a time and the main thing seems to be to just keep putting in the effort, which you are doing, just by being here and trying.

Cravings are tricky things - I find when the urge to have a drink hits that it helps to just say "no, not tonight", and the thought of "perhaps tomorrow" is enough of a relief to make it go away. Only of course when tomorrow rolls round it in its turn becomes "not tonight". But maybe other people feel differently, or have other ways of dealing with them? They do pass but they can be incredibly hard to deal with, especially if you are tackling other emotionally draining things, which you are.

thanks cathybird yes it's the initial feeling of wanting a drink isn't it. If I can get past that then it's all fine and after the third cranberry juice I'm perfectly settled in not drinking.

I'm not sure if, now, I'm not trying very hard, or only having AFDs because I know I'll carry on where I left off next time I drink. It started off easy at the beginning of starting to drink much less, and was a nice novelty, but now my brain's started finding sneaky ways to do that and then drink loads as well other days. It doesn't actually work the way I'm doing it! I'll try your 'tomorrow' thing and see how I do

Thanks for your thoughts as well Wanna Bee Free

piggles1

Honey_Bear wrote: »

I heard a breast cancer specialist and a liver specialist talk about the effect of alcohol on our bodies years ago on two different Radio 4 programmes and when the day came that I made the decision to stop altogether, knowing what they'd said was incredibly helpful when the (short lived) cravings reared their ugly heads.

Piggles, oh Piggles, I'd love to give you a real life (((hug))) but as I can't, have a virtual one instead. :hug: I don't know your full circumstances but one thing I thought when I read your post - you can congratulate yourself and feel good about the fact that you went to the funeral, you coped, and you survived to tell the tale. You managed something you knew you would find difficult, it was difficult and you have every right to feel good about that, even if your illness prevents you from remembering how you coped. Keep posting, you're doing really well.

thanks Honey Bear the bolded part above was one of my main motivations for slowing down or stopping. I'd forgotten it, so thanks for the reminder, and the virtual hug

I started drinking way back because of the things that I couldn't cope with as a child, and then because I was actually unwell mentally but no one noticed so there was no help. All I wanted, back then, was for someone to say 'what's the matter?' and protect me. Alcohol became the substitute for that. I think I still use it for that reason but then it becomes a thing in itself doesn't it, needing to be fed.

I would like, not saying I'll manage it, to go as long as I can without a drink. To give it a really good go, get my tolerance down again. My brain, long used to alcohol, makes a load of reasons why it's ok, or a good idea, or it suits me, or it's no bother really.

There's a little blip in my plan though. I've got to meet my friend who said 'but you never got drunk' (I had a huge tolerance! ) and saying he must stop when he doesn't have a problem. He won't drink if I'm not, and he can't go to the pub if we're not drinking so our meetup never happens, then he says what's wrong with a couple? then he says well howabout a half, then he says ok, none and we won't go the the pub, so we don't meet at all, etc. etc. It goes round in circles. Why can't he just have a pint and I'll have none? But he won't do that either. There's nowhere else to meet and I'd like to go out. I feel pressured by it though that I have to drink because he is.

stupotstu, that makes sense to me as well. 10 days AF though, wow, keep hold of that thought. One thing I've learnt on here actually is that blips don't outweigh achievements.

Is there an alternative to AA where you are? I remember once having sessions with a counsellor who dealt with alcohol addiction. I could talk about stuff around it, not just the alcohol, and find my triggers. Well done for going to AA though, takes some gumption

I've had another AFD, so now I'm on 17/18 AFD please shaggy

New_Me

maman wrote: »

I use the 'put the kettle on' technique new me.

Appologies maman couldn't remember who the tip originated with, but it's too good not to pass around

juliethemuse

Wow I forgot all about this thread, have been so busy but I have had
25 A/F days this month :T

smallholdingsister

Dizzy those spiders need to diet!

27/31 please Shaggy.

24 for February please.

yellowmonkey

27/31 please Shaggy