The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

Dizzy_Imp

25/31 for me please Shaggy x

maman

Target day for me today and hoping to get some more bonus days in too.


Forgive me if this sounds a like a bit of undeserved self congratulation on achieving a low monthly target (which it probably is:o) but I joined the thread determined to get social drinking under control. So I've settled on about 150 days a year with moderate drinking on the non AF days.


My DH has chosen to do Dry January, so I'm waiting to see whether he'll go back to daily drinking in February and beyond. I'm not pushing him one way or the other as it has to be his choice. Any thoughts from others doing Dry January?


10 AFDs please Shaggy.

Honey_Bear

maman wrote: »

Target day for me today and hoping to get some more bonus days in too.

Forgive me if this sounds a like a bit of undeserved self congratulation on achieving a low monthly target (which it probably is:o) but I joined the thread determined to get social drinking under control. So I've settled on about 150 days a year with moderate drinking on the non AF days.

My DH has chosen to do Dry January, so I'm waiting to see whether he'll go back to daily drinking in February and beyond. I'm not pushing him one way or the other as it has to be his choice. Any thoughts from others doing Dry January?

You don't sound at all self-congratulatory, Maman, and I think that you should be allowed to anyway! Why shouldn't we share and be proud of our victories? Jolly well done, by the way! :T:T:T

OH wouldn't be able to do dry January and struggles with not drinking one night a week, let alone what the guidelines are. I could stick my fingers in my ears and sing 'La la la' but I'd rather recognise what that means and let him know when his drinking is completely out of control (twice in 23 years together and it stopped immediately) and point out (once) that the reason he doesn't sleep well may have something to do with alcohol. That's it; anything more would be seriously counter-productive.

He's an intelligent man, a happy drunk when he has more than he should, and has cut back by at least two thirds if not three quarters since I stopped. I think that anyone who sees an alternative pattern of behaviour and recognises that it looks positive or attractive for any reason would be more likely to think seriously about their own habits if they're already finding them a bit uncomfortable.

26/31 please, Shaggy and 29 for February.

maggiesoup1

Wise words Honey Bear.

My partner has never given me a lecture on my (hopefully past) daily drinking habits either, he's just been supportive and non judgemental as I think he too knows that it would be counter-productive, but I see the sadness and concern in his eyes when he's putting the empty wine bottle in the recycling bin then having a cup of liquorice tea at 10.30pm and I'm continuing with a large Bicardi & coke.
We are lucky to have such loving people in our lives.

I'll go for 15 again for February please Shaggy.

shaggydoo

Morning :hello:

1 more AFD for yesterday.



Shaggyx

shaggydoo

January:

= 7 Days AF

= 14 days AF

= 21 days AF
= 28 days AF

= 31 days AF

= target achieved


Alcohol Free Days

Alex 7/28
Barny1979 22/25
CathyBird 25/31
CountingPenniesClaire 20/27
DansMam 21/31
DebJay 25/31
DizzyImp 26/31
Doshwaster 17/24
Effyb4 9/20
[Deleted User] 21/31
Gien 21/31
Honey Bear 26/31

HR_money /31

JHiggins 3/23

Jjef /18

JulieTheMuse 18/24

Lincs 4/31
Mackeroo 10/10
Maggie 11/15
Maman 10/10

Mari 1/20
NewMe 19/23

PenniesFromHeaven 6/23
Piggles 14/18

Poppety 7/11
Pricey 14/20
Satchmo 24/31
SandyPan 14/29
Shaggy 12/17
SmallHoldingSister 23/31
Smiley_77 17/31
StuPotStu 21/31

WBF 3/10
Yellowmonkey 25/31
Alcohol Low Days

Shaggy 19/23




Everyone Welcome! It's never too late to join....

Please highlight your AFDs in Red

Don't hesitate to let me know if I've made a mistake!

Dizzy_Imp

Honey_Bear wrote: »

You don't sound at all self-congratulatory, Maman, and I think that you should be allowed to anyway! Why shouldn't we share and be proud of our victories? Jolly well done, by the way! :T:T:T

Yeah, what she says ^^^^^

I've got through my recent few days of misery without resorting to the booze but I seriously doubt that I'm ever going to be teetotal. However, physically I feel better not having drunk for over three weeks. For me the test will be without the publically announced Dry January "thing" to cling to, I worry that I'll slip back to rewarding myself at the end of a tough day. Silly, I know, as alcohol shouldn't be used in that way, but I really like the feeling of relaxation I get after a couple of glasses.

Cathybird has terrified me on my unit consumption though with her link to how they are worked out, so I know I WILL be cutting right down, whatever I do.

26/31 for today. Won't be drinking today

shaggydoo

February:

= 7 Days AF

= 14 days AF

= 21 days AF
= 28 days AF

= 29 days AF

= target achieved


Alcohol Free Days

Alex

Barny1979

CathyBird /15

CountingPenniesClaire /23

DansMam

DebJay /29

DizzyImp

Doshwaster

Effyb4

[Deleted User]

Gien

Honey Bear /29

HR_money

JHiggins

Jjef

JulieTheMuse

Lincs

Mackeroo

Maggie /15

Maman /10

Mari

NewMe /20

PenniesFromHeaven

Piggles

Poppety

Pricey

Satchmo /29

SandyPan

Shaggy /17

SmallHoldingSister

Smiley_77 /29

StuPotStu

WBF /10

Yellowmonkey
Alcohol Low Days

Shaggy /21




Everyone Welcome! It's never too late to join....

Please highlight your AFDs in Red

Don't hesitate to let me know if I've made a mistake!

shaggydoo

Roll up, Roll up. A New Month, A New Challenge.

SET YOUR

29 days up for grabs!

Everyone Welcome!!!

piggles1

Hi all

I've got to admit I'm struggling. I read a handful of posts people saying they struggle with the stop button even after having AFDs, and I'm having that trouble as well. It seems to get worse for me after a period of AFDs.

The funeral was the hardest thing I've done in a very long time. The whole day had loads of things in it that frighten me, plus I struggled to hold myself together, but did sortof. Also, with a trauma illness (like I have), exposure to things doesn't make it any better, so it's not like wow I did that, and feel better. That doesn't really happen, it's a case of ok that's done, can't remember it, because the brain dissociates during the triggers and doesn't store the memories where they can be recalled.

But it did let in enough to show me something about where I've come from and been. And how I always wanted to be versus how I was/have been generally. I am and have been both at the same time, and it's the same with alcohol where sometimes I have no alcohol and I've changed things around and it's great, and then alcoholic me is always waiting in the wings with all the old stuff it promises to give respite from.

I did manage to only drink one unit at the actual funeral, which was much easier than I thought, but when I got home I had way too much wine. It's not surprising, having had a very whirlwindy day emotionally. And I'm a solitary drinker, not a social one.

I've done that a few times, thinking a beer/some wine is a great idea, it's who I am really and I look forward to it, but soon as I wake next day I regret it. It's like being on a thin ledge, one side unknown but good, the other very well known but a false temporary comfort.

I've read lots of posts and wanted to comment on them at the time and say well done, but they're too far back now so I'll just say well done everyone and I can see a great effort on here and many achievements in with the struggles :T It's not easy is it?!

I've had some more AFDs, so now I'm on 16/18 AFD please shaggy

For February I'll stick at 18 because I'm nervous of making it any higher at the moment.