The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

Ellsbel

Hi, I've been lurking on these boards for a loooong time now, but am popping my head out of my shell to ask if I could join you?
Feeling like I need to make a few changes and could do with some group support on some of them!
I'm not an everyday drinker, but when I open a bottle of wine, I'll invariably finish it off, I'm embarrassed to say. I'm also shamefully in the habit of cracking open the wine to relax/destress/cheer myself up - you name it and I'll find an excuse to do it.
I really want to eventually cut it out completely and find another way to relax, so with that in mind, I'd like to start with a target of 22 for the remainder of December, if you'll have me!!

maman

Barny1979 wrote: »

5/15 AFDs for last night, currently on anti-biotics got to have injections for a potential clot, which I'm being scanned for on Monday, was supposed to have been flying to Madrid this morning to watch the football.

Oh poor you. to missing the football but your health must take priority. Hope it's positive news on Monday.

Ellsbel wrote: »

Hi, I've been lurking on these boards for a loooong time now, but am popping my head out of my shell to ask if I could join you?
Feeling like I need to make a few changes and could do with some group support on some of them!
I'm not an everyday drinker, but when I open a bottle of wine, I'll invariably finish it off, I'm embarrassed to say. I'm also shamefully in the habit of cracking open the wine to relax/destress/cheer myself up - you name it and I'll find an excuse to do it.
I really want to eventually cut it out completely and find another way to relax, so with that in mind, I'd like to start with a target of 22 for the remainder of December, if you'll have me!!

Good to have you on board and :Tfor starting now rather than putting it off to New Year. Your story sounds all too familiar so you'll fit in well.:)

Honey_Bear

Healing vibes for you, Barny, and welcome Ellsbel.

6/31 please, Shaggy.

Barny1979

Thank you for the best wishes, 6/15 AFDs today

graemecarter

Ellsbel wrote: »

Hi, I've been lurking on these boards for a loooong time now, but am popping my head out of my shell to ask if I could join you?
Feeling like I need to make a few changes and could do with some group support on some of them!
I'm not an everyday drinker, but when I open a bottle of wine, I'll invariably finish it off, I'm embarrassed to say. I'm also shamefully in the habit of cracking open the wine to relax/destress/cheer myself up - you name it and I'll find an excuse to do it.
I really want to eventually cut it out completely and find another way to relax, so with that in mind, I'd like to start with a target of 22 for the remainder of December, if you'll have me!!

Welcome.
What else do you like doing where you can 'lose yourself' for a while? I find doing what I enjoy is mostly relaxing. For some it's baking, gardening, reading, tennis, etc etc.
I like rowing and find that I feel better after a row, and more relaxed. Any hobbies you have or have let slip that you could take up again?

Ellsbel

Thank you for the warm welcome:)
I'm pleased to report that I've chalked up my first 1/22 today!
Maman - my New Year resolutions always seem doomed to fail, so I thought I'd buck the trend and start old year ones instead:D
Graemecarter - to tell the truth, I've sort of "lost" myself a bit as far as having interests or hobbies are concerned, and this is something else I need to change; I aim to try out a few new things to see if anything fires up some enthusiasm in me:) For tonight though, I settled for a bit of a read, some TV, and a couple of diet lemonades!

Barny1979

7/15 AFDs today, calling early, but know I'll be Af.

aneres

4/26 please Shaggy.

Had two evenings of drinking. Didn't get drunk but had a few.

I must admit for me abstinence is easier than drinking in moderation. Met a friend on Thursday and had a couple of mulled wines then came home and opened a bottle of Rose which I don't even really like. I think I was thinking I'm not just blowing one of my drinking days on two poxy mulled wines (stupid I know).

Then Friday I finished the Rose (should've just poured it down the sink on Thursday) and then had a couple of Tia Maria's.

debjay

Barny1979 wrote: »

5/15 AFDs for last night, currently on anti-biotics got to have injections for a potential clot, which I'm being scanned for on Monday, was supposed to have been flying to Madrid this morning to watch the football.

Sorry to hear that. From an MSE perspective, can you claim on your insurance? Hoping for good news at the scan 👍

Honey_Bear

aneres wrote: »

I must admit for me abstinence is easier than drinking in moderation.

Weirdly (and worrying this will sounds holier-than-thou but here goes) that's exactly what I've found. In my drinking days, pretty much every single evening started with the thought, 'Well, I shouldn't, I know, but what the heck [sic], one or two won't hurt and then I'll stop and have an early night.' And I felt guilty, every single time I had more than two. I worry, sometimes, that it sounds as though I'm proud of how much I could put away, so we'll end that there.


I do still, occasionally, think, 'I wonder if just one G&T/glass of red wine/champagne....' I'm pretty sure that will always be there. But, there's another thought that follows on which is ' .... Nah. It won't be just one, will it? But that red wine does smell delish ... Oh, right, yeah, I don't drink .... Hey ho.' Finding AF alternatives was the key to that for me.


With hindsight, on the very few occasions I had a stab at going AF just for a short while, I wish I'd tried the non-alcoholic alternatives until I found one I liked. If I had, I could have had AF evenings regularly and that would have been a brilliant alternative.


Just as an aside, Sainsbobs muddles up AF and low alcohol beers, which I didn't realise. I mistakenly bought and drank a single bottle of 0.5% beer a few weeks ago, and didn't realise it until I checked the label the morning after, as I was recycling it - because I didn't particularly enjoy the taste and wanted to know what to avoid in the future. It's the only alcohol I've had since I stopped completely and ... it didn't lead to anything.


I'm starting to get very curious about something. When anyone stops drinking completely there is often a reaction on the part of others of, 'Stopping drinking is only the first step. The problems that led to the excessive drinking will need to be addressed, or before you know it, you'll be back on the booze.'


Really? Day 135 here. And I'd guess I'm no more or less screwed up than anyone else on the planet. Rather happy, busy getting on with stuff, not achieving as much as I'd like, irritated by small things that are sent to try us - like splinters or dog hair embedded in the carpet - but coping in a normal sort of 'Let's just get on with life,' kind of way.


I don't know anything at all about addiction, but I do know that my drinking was a really, really bad habit that was probably heading for addiction and I'm so glad that's behind me.


If I thought I could get away with drinking in moderation I'd be doing it, but I have found this is a lot easier and that has surprised me hugely.


Just wanted to put that out there.