The Giving Up/ Cutting Down alcohol support thread - number 13

maman

Poor_Single_lady wrote: »

19/31 pleaseI had a drink yesterday. Boo. It was a few But not too many, I remember everything, I wasn't hungover, didn't do anything remotely stupid and got home at a normal hour with all my things.
So it was everything that I aim for when I do have a drink. But still would have rather it hadn't happened. But it has so push on today is another day.
HB although I haven't managed the full month AF I think this sensible approach is down to all your help you have given me. Big thank you.

That's a very balanced way of looking at things PSL. Realistic without beating yourself up. Chalking up AF days is a very visual and quantifiable way of cutting down but it's not the only way. I'm (almost;)) as pleased when, like you, I have a couple of drinks and then stop as I am with an AF day. Unless you think giving up is for you then being sensible around booze is what we're all aiming for.


I had a rare AF Saturday yesterday. I was driving last night but the old me would have come home late and poured a bottle down my neck no problem. Not any more!!:D


11 AFDs please Shaggy.

Barny1979

16/24 AFDs today

Arkers

Good morning everyone,
16 AFD please Shaggy.
Arkers x

cathybird

Morning all, 19/21 for me please.

maman

No drinking planned for today. I'm aiming for my two week smiley by Wednesday!:D


12 AFDs please Shaggy.

Honey_Bear

Thanks PSL. OH and I went to see Tim Smit (Eden Project, Lost Gardens of Heligan) speak recently and several of the things he talked about made a great deal of sense, which isn't surprising. One of them was, 'Have you ever changed your mind because someone shouted at you?' It's a verty simple question but it really, really resonated with me. People who shout, argue and preach are, I'm afraid, not achieving what they think they are, whereas people who can stand back, think objectively and reflect before opening their gob probably stand more of a chance of making a difference. Inadvertently I can be quite aggresive in real life so I'm learning to tone it down a bit and it's making quite a difference.

I've come to believe that since giving up smoking and drinking, anyway. I lost count of the the number of people who were holier than thou about smoking, whereas the person who pointed out that if you take English mustard, eat the strongest cheddar and lots of salt on your food - basically smoking is destroying your sense of taste. Nothing holier than thou about that, just a straightforward factoid that made me stop and think.

The other bit of smoking cessation that made all the difference was, 'Never give up giving up.' Instead of feeling like a failure because I couldn't stay stopped, what that made me realise was those who succede are the ones who have another shot at it when they feel motivated to do so and keep doing so until it sticks. Eventually it worked for me but I'd been trying to stop smoking on and off for 20 years.

So, for me, stopping drinking was something that I knew wouldn't be helpful if I were part of a group that wagged fingers and told me that I was a bit of carp out-of-control human being, and very fortunately I found two places where everyone I came into contact with was incredibly positive and helpful and actually offered some practical advice. That made a huge difference, as did reading around the subject of booze generally, because I like reading.

Anything that resonates with anyone, that people find helpful is great and I think the mindset on this thread of encouragement is brilliant. That tone was already set when I joined.

And yes, there is HUGE pressure to drink nowadays, and the fact that most of us move in a social group who share quite a lot of habits and values means that what appears to be normal, may, actually, be quite abnormal in wider society. We are absolutely bombarded with images of booze consumption being the only choice so we come to believe that what we're doing by having a glass or three every day is our only choice, but it isn't - and we just need to be reminded of that.

So, if anyone is in the process of changing their habit around booze, all I can say is, keep going with rethinking drinking. It will happen if you follow the mantra, Never give up cutting down (giving up giving up); whatever's your thing. I just went that bit further because I needed to and it worked for me, thank goodness. But I didn't do it on my own. Hang on in there PSL, you're doing marvellously.

22/31 please Shaggy.

Barny1979

17/24 AFDs today

CuppaTea

12/17 please

cathybird

20/21 for me please.

sukeyboo

10/12 for today please Shaggy