It's all too much - need advice on where to start :(

Soworried

Hi littlestranger
You sound like your where I was 2 years ago. You can move forward, it is just learning that you will not be able to do it quickly or every single day.
The way I did it was by doing 3 minutes an hour on the task that was ticking me off the most. That sounds like you will get nowhere but you do. Within 3 hours the improvement motivates you
I only did it on non work days during working hours. I still use this method on my down days and I find it helps my mood as well if I force myself to do a task for 3 minutes.
Sometimes I would count the 3 minutes down , sometimes I get lost in it for over 20 minutes :A
I still use this method and the house is a lot better for it. I can open the front door now without hiding away:o
I'm even thinking of decorating if I can get help :eek:
Keep posting and don't feel bad x

Gwendolyn

I really understand your post.
I find it very hard to do stuff. Some days I can't make myself tidy anything or do anything at all.
I have proper OCD (and that's a whole thread in itself) and I can be extrodinarily fastidious sometimes but then I can numb myself to the mess, clutter and dirt (as a result of not being able to clean properly die to stuff).
Small steps is the way to go. For me, light exercise gives me more energy and time to think things through .

nimbo

Big hugs - it can be really hard, but like everyone has said small steps....

I like to play the Benny Hill music in advert breaks - i'll be there with a bag (for rubbish) and two boxes, one for charity shops, and one for storing.... It works a treat... managed to sort a bag for the rubbish earlier, only
to realize that I have NO space in the bin outside... Haha... My house has been taken over by crafting things, (and piles of laundry, and just 'stuff'), but I will get it sorted.

I too study, and am finishing my degree, so tend to focus on that - but I do find that when doing an assignment I can do small things - so earlier on a wee break I stripped the bed, and put the sheets in the wash... Then next pee break i made the bed again as it gives me just a few minutes away from the PC..Then next break I hang the washing out... When you get a coffee do the washing up while the kettle boils... It doesn't make a huge difference in one day, but it does keep on top of stuff...

My other favorite is to clean the bathroom while the bath runs (we have no shower)... The first time it takes a while, but after chucking out all the old toiletries that may have been there for a few years (some of my sisters have dust, and I bought them for her 3 years ago - I want to just throw them out, if she hasn't used them yet she never will...) It's the smallest room in my house, and makes me feel like I have achieved something...

I can have issues with the thought of germs, and after having in the past having to have treatment for bleaching my hands after clening the bathroom, I find it useful to clen before my morning bath or shower (I won't have more than two baths a day, and they have to be at different ends of the day). One you have done the first big clean this will hopefully get better though...

good_advice

Def. a little at a time. I have been doing that all day.
We have been away so unpacking and wash mountain.
Tomorrow I shall be taking the decorations down a little at a time.
one room at a time.

ButterflyKisses

I just wanted to add to the great advice you've already received, that I find when having a sort out it often seems to get worse before it gets better. I have a pile about 4 feet high in front of my airing cupboard at the moment waiting to go to the charity shop/recycling centre etc!

I just wouldn't want you to feel discouraged if you feel you have been working hard at it and can't see much difference. Maybe take a few photos of some of the bits you want to tackle first (you don't have to show anyone!) and then compare in a month or so, so you can see how all the little bits have added up.

nitnurse-not2

You need to remember "you can't eat an elephant in one bite";)
Little and often.:) Choose one room, or even one small area. When you set a small goal and achieve it, that can spur you on to do the next thing. :jMaybe choose the room you really want to change. Write a list of everything that you want to achieve in that room.
Blu tac it to the door and every time you complete even the smallest thing, you get a tick:j:j:j:j.....Its a bit like using star charts for children.;)
The ad break idea works, as does the timer one.
I often tidy the toiletries around the bathroom as I am brushing my teeth....or even when having a wee if they are in reach:D

Whatever method you use please believe me, it can be done.
I was once in the position you are in ( without the cats;)).
My life is far from perfect now but with determination you can achieve small things that add up to very big things.
Good luck.xxx

MummyBobble

You are most definitely not alone! I too suffer from depression and there are days when I find I can do nothing, sleeping is often the only thing I can manage but then I feel worse about doing nothing useful... I am totally rubbish at cleaning, tidying and generally keeping on top of things.

I try to make a habit of simply taking something and putting it away, or taking a piece of rubbish and putting it in the bin whenever I go up or downstairs (single mum to DD16 and DS13 and seem to be the only one of us actually capable of using the outdoor bins... To be fair they will take rubbish into the kitchen but for some reason it gets left on the side and never quite makes it into the bin!). Some days I'm so enthusiastic I head off with a carrier bag in hand and fill that with rubbish :T

My biggest problem is dealing with the "stuff" that has possibly any value. I have large debts to deal with and am constantly putting it all to one side to ebay/carboot or whatever, but never get around to it because there's always too much else to do (though I did donate a very large number of hats, scarves, gloves, jumpers etc to our local homeless charity a couple of weeks ago).

As others have said, stick with babysteps and over time you will begin to see a difference. I can see some of my bedroom floor now :j. Good luck, and stick around here because you will get lots of support.

VfM4meplse

monnagran wrote: »

I set it for 10 or 15 minutes, choose one small area to clear and go for it. I am always surprised at how much can be achieved in 10 minutes if you are focussed on getting something done before the timer goes off.

Love all your tips monnagran! My version of this is to stick an upbeat CD on (preferably something I can sing along to that the neighbours won't object to too much!) and just get on with it. I try and get as much done as possible during that time, working fast and if I haven't run out of steam by the end of it, I just keep going with another CD until I do. Another rule is, I touch it, it's to clean it or throw it out, not to put it back where I found it because that would be a wasted action.

The reward at the end is a good cup of tea in a less cluttered environment. Just an hour a day during the week means I don't have to waste my weekends doing it.

coffeycase

As previously, briefly, mentioned, look up flylady.net

The site gives you daily tasks and monthly habits to establish like a month of tips to help get the laundry sorted

Worth a glance and believe me you are not alone, bloody telly has us all believing we are doing everything less tan perfectly!!!

bluebag

Another one here putting her hand up to being overwhelmed at times.
It's such a defeating feeling, so fed up of it all and yet stunned into inaction by the magnitude of it.

Try flylady, she is very likeable, gentle and understands the problem.

The other lady I found helpful is Julie Morgenstern with her book organising from the inside out.

Keep on trucking.