How does one start a new life.

sebastianj

Once retired and separated, how does one start a new life? Is it possible? I think financially it will be a disaster and survival very tough. Has any one done it? What needs to be taken into account?
Any thoughts most appreciated.
sebastian

whitewing

With a deep breath and a smile.


For me, I find reading books helps - something to spark new ideas, comfort me when I'm down.


Retired people I know suggest some kind of routine makes life less dull in that it stops them all merging into one long day, so maybe have tasks and pleasures that are done on particular days of the week. A couple I know always do day trips on Wednesdays.


You could also think about the seasons and maybe start to build some new traditions in for particular times of the year.


When you have things that you do, and enjoy doing, it is easier to extend the hand of friendship to someone else to join in, and if you are doing it anyway, it becomes less of an issue if they decline your invitation.


Also, maybe a good declutter and changing things around will help.

whitewing

Also, reading this thread may help give you some ideas. The circumstances are different to yours.


https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4835961

Laurajo_2

I suppose it depends on your definition of 'a new life'.

It all starts with a simple question; what would you like to do?

Try and envision where you would like to be in a month, six months, twelve months and five years time; then look at ways of achieving this. Don't be too hard on yourself, though - life often throws unexpected obstacles and your ideas of what you want will change and evolve over time.

Dunroamin

Most people face being alone for a good part of their retirement, even if that's from bereavement rather than separation.

Do you actually have to retire at the present time?

belfastgirl23

I would recommend as a starting point taking a look at 'the happiness project'. I found it was helpful in making me think about what makes me happy and how to do things in life to support this.

thorsoak

To quote from the Walt Disney film "Finding Nemo" - just keep swimming, just keep swimming!!

My planned retirement plans were scuppered when my DH died just two years after we retired

Nearly three years later, I'm still in the same home - fortunately when we retired we had downsized and so I'm mortgage-free at least. I also took on a part-time job - completely different to what I had done previously - very little money, but also very little responsibility!

My advice is to find a pace that suits YOU ....try everything once - its as important to know what you don't enjoy, as well as those activities that you do enjoy. Learn to say "yes, why not" as well as "no, sorry, that's not possible".

And come back and tell us how you are doing - remember - just keep swimming, just keep swimming!

ukmike

Well,seeing as your separated,why not try online dating? Lots of free ones,Plenty of Fish is by far the largest & it's free!

System

I made a few new friends, went out occasionally and bought a few new clothes which gave me a bit of a boost.

sebastianj

Change in circumstances and facing them is difficult. It can be very lonely especially when time not on your side.
Seb.

thorsoak

sebastianj wrote: »

Change in circumstances and facing them is difficult. It can be very lonely especially when time not on your side.
Seb.

You don't know how much time you have - so time is precious - don't waste a day of it! Talk to everyone and anyone - listen to what they say - believe me, don't waste time on feeling lonely - it just doesn't help. Do something- anything! You don't have to ask the permission of anyone else to please yourself!