gambling getting out of control

pe1998

hello again

spent most of yesterday in and around the forums on gamcare

pretty eye opening, saw a good number of people with a similar attitude to what mine was when i opened this thread. The advice they got, on the whole, was similar to what's been said on here, if in a slightly more sympathetic tone

I guess i didn't see myself in them as i'm not in debt and have never been in debt. There were a lot of stories about guys and girls physically not being able to walk past their high street bookies. Most due to FOBT I didn't know what that meant, but turns out it's Fixed Odds Betting Terminal. The video casino games.

But it's the mindset of chasing losses that seems to connect everyone who is a problem gambler.

As to my deposits and withdrawals, for what it's worth, since october 1st i've deposited £4040 and withdrawn to bank £6287. So that is a £2247 profit. What caused me to start this thread was the fact that before last wednesday my profit was £3447. In the last week i've given back £1200 and all that is going through my head is to bet more to "win" that money back, a sense of anger/embarrassment that I gave them that money back.

I'm going away to europe this weekend and will mostly be without internet so that should allow enough time to pass without betting that this feeling should dissipate. Clearly my attitude to gambling needs addressing, quite how i'm going to do that as yet i don't know.

itsanne

pe1998 wrote: »

hello again

spent most of yesterday in and around the forums on gamcare

pretty eye opening, saw a good number of people with a similar attitude to what mine was when i opened this thread. The advice they got, on the whole, was similar to what's been said on here, if in a slightly more sympathetic tone

I guess i didn't see myself in them as i'm not in debt and have never been in debt. There were a lot of stories about guys and girls physically not being able to walk past their high street bookies. Most due to FOBT I didn't know what that meant, but turns out it's Fixed Odds Betting Terminal. The video casino games.

But it's the mindset of chasing losses that seems to connect everyone who is a problem gambler.

As to my deposits and withdrawals, for what it's worth, since october 1st i've deposited £4040 and withdrawn to bank £6287. So that is a £2247 profit. What caused me to start this thread was the fact that before last wednesday my profit was £3447. In the last week i've given back £1200 and all that is going through my head is to bet more to "win" that money back, a sense of anger/embarrassment that I gave them that money back.

I'm going away to europe this weekend and will mostly be without internet so that should allow enough time to pass without betting that this feeling should dissipate. Clearly my attitude to gambling needs addressing, quite how i'm going to do that as yet i don't know.

I hope you don't think it's patronising if I say how pleased I am at this as a response to everyone's posts. I wish you very good luck (or is "luck" inappropriate :eek:) in tackling it!

hazyjo

pe1998 wrote: »

In the last week i've given back £1200 and all that is going through my head is to bet more to "win" that money back, a sense of anger/embarrassment that I gave them that money back.

And that is exactly how they make their money. When that penny drops is when you'll stop giving your money to them. You will ALWAYS interpret it as chasing that money back. But they are new bets, races, matches, spins, whatever. It is the fact that you have that money there, you bet on something else. Gambling is an addiction. It's the thrill of a win or lose too. I'm sure the thought of buying premium bonds with that money doesn't fill you with the same excitement.

Yes, the odd few people will pop into a casino for a night out once every 5 years or so with a group of friends and lose X amount of £s. Thousands even if they're loaded. But casinos, online betting, etc all make their money by gamblers chasing that money back. Huge bucks for them.

My BF doesn't have spare money so he doesn't have that option. I'm sure he'd have been chasing many a bet if he had money still. He's gutted when he doesn't win and is definitely keener to put money on something else. I think it's more about that thrill of 'winning' than 'winning your money back'.

For example, if you did win £1,000 then lost £600 of it by gambling - if the next thing to come in won you £1,000 again, would you stop cos you had £1,400 in the bank? Or would you see all of that money (or at least the 'extra' £400 from the first win) as 'gambling money'? It should ALL be seen as a 'win'. A gambling addict would not be able to walk away with that £1,400 in his pocket. So which are you? Only you know how bad it's got and how you see that 'win-money'. Is it 'gambling-money'? Sounds to me like you are seeing it as that and only beat yourself up about it when you lose some of it.

It's a very destructive 'hobby'. I would seriously try to stop now before it does become a lifestyle rather than a 'hobby'.

Jx

Bing1987

pe1998 wrote: »

hello again

spent most of yesterday in and around the forums on gamcare

pretty eye opening, saw a good number of people with a similar attitude to what mine was when i opened this thread. The advice they got, on the whole, was similar to what's been said on here, if in a slightly more sympathetic tone

I guess i didn't see myself in them as i'm not in debt and have never been in debt. There were a lot of stories about guys and girls physically not being able to walk past their high street bookies. Most due to FOBT I didn't know what that meant, but turns out it's Fixed Odds Betting Terminal. The video casino games.

But it's the mindset of chasing losses that seems to connect everyone who is a problem gambler.

As to my deposits and withdrawals, for what it's worth, since october 1st i've deposited £4040 and withdrawn to bank £6287. So that is a £2247 profit. What caused me to start this thread was the fact that before last wednesday my profit was £3447. In the last week i've given back £1200 and all that is going through my head is to bet more to "win" that money back, a sense of anger/embarrassment that I gave them that money back.

I'm going away to europe this weekend and will mostly be without internet so that should allow enough time to pass without betting that this feeling should dissipate. Clearly my attitude to gambling needs addressing, quite how i'm going to do that as yet i don't know.

Chasing losses is one of the classic signs of a gambling problem, there is no getting away from that.

The only advice out there in the mainstream is abstinence and for the vast majority of people I believe that is the correct advice.

Only you will know if you are ready to stop completely.

If you are not ready yet then may I suggest that you at least don't place another bet until you have thought long and hard about why you chase losses and try and put something in place to prevent it happening again.

I can reccommend a book on the subject if you want to PM me. I know this won't go down well with others on this thread but this book has helped me and may well help the OP.

If, having read this book,you still go chasing losses, even once, then it really is time to stop for your own good.

andydiysaver

pe1998 wrote: »

Hi, new user name for an old poster for obvious reasons

Firstly, I'm not addicted to gambling, I regularly go weeks if not months without doing it, but when I do to quote a phrase "I'm all in" I'm very much a binge gambler

I have been gambling a lot recently, and as the title says, it's getting way out of hand. one of my problems is this: A win of £100 means less to me than a loss of £20. So it doesn't matter how much I win, as soon as I lose any of it I throw more money at it.

Wednesday night is a perfect example. I started out with £300 in my Bet365 account and on thursday morning checked the balance (tend to bet mostly on american sports played during the night) it was £382. But from looking at my bet history I placed 2 bets late, was a bit drunk as it was a night out, for £300 and £224 respectively. They both lost. So without those bets my balance "should" have been £906. As other bets I'd placed had won. I couldn't get past the £524 I'd "given" them back and chased it, I lost the £300 and then over the past few days have lost substantially more.

I have just analytically went through my bank statement from 1st october till now there are 27 separate deposits and 26 credits.

From this I can see I have won money but all I can think about is trying to get back what i've lost.

Despite being up this level of binge gambling is unsustainable and I can't keep doing this.

This may sound like I'm in massive denial, but if I didn't have a almost pathological need to be right and could actually accept losses, I'd be a pretty good gambler.

I have self excluded from all but one of my online accounts, although in fairness it only takes one to do the damage and I've limited my daily deposit limit to £100


Any thoughts or similar experiences would be massively helpful as I know this could be/will be massively destructive if it goes unchecked.

thanks,
pe

for me it was one enormous loss and watching it unravel before my eyes having been cashing up and almost spending the winnings only a second before


second goal went in, it was that player, could not bloody believe it, enormous lay at betfair , a few people got very rich on me that night, I got very poor


and for me that's what did it, stopped me dead , in one, I knew I never wanted to feel as sh*t as that ever ever again

peleus

a few people got very rich on me that night, I got very poor

That happens some time but just bear in mind that they're always not on top. Sometimes, it's the other way around.

pe1998

an update on my situation,

Since I last posted things have been down then up and now pretty levelled off!

I gambled a bit over Christmas, I won £300 on Christmas eve but that was probably a bad thing as it quickly spiralled out of control and over the following days I lost the £300 and gave them another £700.

Absolutely hated myself for it, but part of me relished it as it almost forced my hand, as it were, into continued gambling.

On NYE things changed, I won two bets. £200 on a double which returned £700 and £200 on a treble which returned £1500.

I put on a couple of bets on Jan 4th and won £180.

I phoned gamcare soon after as I could see that despite being "up" I was falling into the same pattern. Spoke to someone for probably an hour and got a lot off my chest, similar to this I guess.

I haven't gambled at all since Jan 4th, 24 days and counting.

I do miss it and I still find myself checking odds when watching live sport. The australian open tennis was particularly difficult. But if all i'm doing is checking I can live with that.

Not too bothered if there are no replies to this, may use this as a kind of blog occasionally dropping in and posting updates!

sacha28

:beer: :j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j:j

You need to be commended, that's awesome (been reading this from afar, sorry)

OurKev

pe1998 wrote: »

of course there is, what are professional poker players?

A true professional poker player doesn't really gamble - he competes against gamblers with less knowledge/skill than himself.


He won't win every hand/every game, but in the long term will take advantage of lesser players.


There are not many professional poker players making a decent living!

itsanne

pe1998 wrote: »

I phoned gamcare soon after as I could see that despite being "up" I was falling into the same pattern. Spoke to someone for probably an hour and got a lot off my chest, similar to this I guess.

I haven't gambled at all since Jan 4th, 24 days and counting.

I do miss it and I still find myself checking odds when watching live sport. The australian open tennis was particularly difficult. But if all i'm doing is checking I can live with that.

Not too bothered if there are no replies to this, may use this as a kind of blog occasionally dropping in and posting updates!

:T :T

That's great! Well done.