gambling getting out of control

System

pe1998 wrote: »

I don't gamble in casinos or high street bookies, I bet on a very small number of sports. I don't count football in this as i seem to be able to differentiate between this and my other gambling.

I exclusively bet on tennis, basketball, american football and baseball. All two outcome events, betting on handicap over/under markets predominately.

I think one of the reasons for this, and my inability to accept losses, is that there is are masses of statistical data available for these sports and markets. I think I get more from being proved correct than the monetary gain.

You are showing classic signs of addiction and you are in denial. If it is all about being right then there are a million things you can do that are not harmful where you could analyse and be right.

Take it from me - this has nothing to do with you needing to be right. That is just the twisted logic of an addict to jutify what he does.

I really feel for you. You have a road to realisation that will probably be painful. I sincerely hope that you have a realisation soon and avoid the bad stuff that could be coming your way.

LEJC

i fully admit ive no real experience of an addiction other than perhaps playing candy crush too much...but joking aside


what does your partner think of your pass time?
can you afford to carry on at the level that you are doing without it impacting on your non gambling life?
if the answer to those questions are "shes/hes fully supportive" and "it has no impact whatsoever"...then my advice to you would be to carry on enjoying yourself....although I suspect that if its got to the stage that you are posting for advice on a money saving forum,then there is a problem which needs addressing whether you care to admit its a full blown addiction or not.
do not let this get bigger and take some advice now

fabforty

pe1998 wrote: »

Thanks, I have looked at a lot of the organisations that are available, and I just don't see myself in the stories people tell in the various forums. Maybe that's part of the problem.

I went a year without really gambling at all, apart from a £10 football coupon on a saturday and saved about £8000 towards the cost of our wedding.

I do think that learning to accept losses rather than abstinence would be better for me and there is nothing on any of the gambling problem websites about this.

The example I gave about Wednesday, if I didn't feel the need to win back a loss, I'd have made £82 profit. rather than a big loss.

I'm going to give gamcare a call and see how it plays out

Okay, so heres' a really simple question. Is your gambling a problem or isn't it? It's hard to tell from your posts - on the one hand you seem to think that there is a problem (as it would be pointless starting a thread to tell everyone that you don't have a gambling problem), but you then go on to say that basically everything is fine. Calling Gamcare won't help if you are calling to tell them that there really isn't a problem here.

swingaloo

'I do think that learning to accept losses rather than abstinence would be better for me'.


So how many losses would be acceptable?
At what point do you say enough?

Are you happy to accept a loss of £300 per week, £500 per week, or will you only worry when you can no longer afford the mortgage/rent and are at the point of becoming homeless.

Will you be happy that you learnt to accept the losses then.

More to the point- is your wife/girlfriend happy to subsidise you while you accept these losses?

itsanne

pe1998 wrote: »

Firstly, I'm not addicted to gambling . . . Sorry to have to say it, but you are.

Despite being up this level of binge gambling is unsustainable and I can't keep doing this . . . If you weren't addicted, you'd simply stop the binge.

This may sound like I'm in massive denial . . . It doesn't just sound like it, you are in massive denial.

but if I didn't have a almost pathological need to be right and could actually accept losses . . .This suggests you need to stop completely, not just "keep it under control".

I'd be a pretty good gambler . . .There's no such thing as a "good" gambler.

I've limited my daily deposit limit to £100 . . . So you are potentially spending £3000 per month on gambling. That's £36000 per year. You must have a very well paid job to spend that on a hobby!

I know this could be/will be massively destructive if it goes unchecked . . .Absolutely! But isn't it already?

If you put your first and last statements from here together and consider them alongside your thread title, I think you actually know you are addicted even if you don't want to accept it. That's a positive thing, because it's so much smaller steps from knowing to accepting to overcoming than starting from not knowing at all.

retepetsir

Not addicted but have made 27 deposits in only a few months?

mountainofdebt

can I second gambleaware -www.gambleaware.co.uk

tel 0800 8020 133

You think you may have a problem do you - http://www.gambleaware.co.uk/recognise-a-problem/signs-of-problem-gambling

If so then give them a ring -they're brilliant

Recognising you have (or may have)a problem is the first step

Morglin

pe1998 wrote: »

Thanks, I have looked at a lot of the organisations that are available, and I just don't see myself in the stories people tell in the various forums. Maybe that's part of the problem.

I went a year without really gambling at all, apart from a £10 football coupon on a saturday and saved about £8000 towards the cost of our wedding.

I do think that learning to accept losses rather than abstinence would be better for me and there is nothing on any of the gambling problem websites about this.

The example I gave about Wednesday, if I didn't feel the need to win back a loss, I'd have made £82 profit. rather than a big loss.

I'm going to give gamcare a call and see how it plays out

Gambling is like any other activity, in that if it causes *you* stress or disrupts your life, then it is a problem for YOU.

Instead of trying to work out a "way to accept losses", you really need to just stop doing it, and use the money for something nice!

It's obvious really that if most bookies are rich, which they are, and most gamblers, sooner or later, are poor, as tends to be the way, who the only winners are.

Lin

onlyroz

Accepting the losses is the hardest thing. The money is gone. Attempting to win it back is the ultimate foolishness. If you get the urge to gamble then find yourself something else to do - often if you can postpone it a while then the urge will disappear. Try and find yourself some more productive hobbies. Maybe sign up for a night-class, take up photography or painting, or hill-walking or whatever. Something that you can throw yourself into to keep yourself busy and the demons at bay.

dawyldthing

One of my family members has a habit of going on bingo sites when they are bored so i've started blocking gambling sites when i've logged off.If you can talk to your partner and have talktalk as your internet provider (i'm not sure if others have it too, but they might do) you can block all gambling sites so you won't be able to log on until you reset it. I have a bet when i'm bored sometimes and at times lock myself out of it too and it does help as it stops all the boredom bets due to the time it takes to get back online and would totally recommend it as its definately helped us.