Funeral flowers

FiloFilo

Would anyone be able to provide some guidance on this. My mum is a struggling pensioner and is trying to arrange the funeral for my stepfather. We are looking at flowers and don't know what would be 'apt'. We like one horseshoe arrangement which is about half a metre, and that will be £70. Should we include something else to go on top of the coffin? We don't want it to look bare, but at the same time, don't want to spend too much money she doesn't have on flowers as he will be cremated and ashes returned to my mother so nowhere to display them afterwards.

joerugby

You don't need any flowers at all.

Your mum may wish to donate (say) £20 to her favourite charity instead but this is not essential

Battybird

My neighbour had a single rose placed on her husband's coffin. It represented the love they'd shared.

She donated money she'd have spent on a wreath to the hospice where he had died.

paddedjohn

Funeral flowers are a big rip off, £70 for a wreath that is forgotten about by the following day. Do as suggested above and ask for donations instead of flowers.

Savvy_Sue

You can also have something 'sensible' / arrangeable and ask the funeral directors to return it to you before cremation.

We put a wreath from Mum on Dad's coffin, a bunch of flowers from the children, and a basket arrangement from the grandchildren. Only the wreath went with Dad, we had the rest home for Mum (at her request).

Also don't be afraid to ask for quotes from more than one florist.

madbadrob

Flowers if you choose to have them could be donated to a church after rather than left. I would personally not bother with flowers

Rob

John_Pierpoint

Flowers tend to be a bit like Xmas cards and the bereaved get a bit of reassurance/empathy seing flowers from those who cannot make it to the funeral and retrieving the little cards. It also gives the other mourners something to do as they mill about..

In terms of a value for money, it is a bit like the wedding industry - you might find someone operating with low overheads on the interweb..

dandelionclock30

Go to the market ad get a bunch of the persons favourites and place them yourself on the top of the coffin. Or like someone said get a single flower. £70.00 is far too much for something that costs a few pounds.
At then end of the day the person has died and most people wouldnt want their relatives getting ripped off at this time.

In_a_spin

When my parents died they asked for no flowers and donations to be made to a named charity. We did have a Red Rose placed on top of the casket. You don't notice there are no flowers.

The undertaker was given the donations and later we were given a list with names of who had contributed and the total sum raised.

It was also nice to receive a letter later from the Charity thanking us for the donation.

elisabeth76

Like other contributors, my husband and I felt flowers would not have been a good use of people's money when our son died, he certainly would not have approved. He was a keen hill walker so for us it was an easy decision to ask if people wished to contribute, to donate to the Mountain Rescue Organisation.
On the day of his funeral, we really did not notice the absence of flowers and when I have visited the cemetery where he is buried, I notice on other new graves, expensive wreaths lying wilting and am more than pleased that we made the decision we did.

madbadrob

Mountain Rescue and RNLI are in my opinion the only two charities worth donating to. Having been rescued myself by the mountain rescue team out of Ambleside ( I was an air cadet and we managed to get lost in a fog on returning from Scafell Pike and yes we checked the forecast) I have nothing but admiration for what they put themselves through for those of us who have little experience on the fells. The RNLI well nothing needs saying about what those guys do.

Rob