'Living Simply' with children

arbroath_lass

Araboo27 wrote: »

it makes me laugh how strangers think it's acceptable to be so rude when it's done via a forum like this. You see it all over MSE and, quite frankly, it disgusts me! People come on here for support and advice, if you can offer neither then why waste your time posting a comment?

I haven't read any rudeness in the replies only from yourself tbh. If you didn't want opinions, why did you ask on an open forum? Support and advice are not necessarily the same things. You will always get people who disagree with you, that's the way of the world.


If you want to do it, then do it. If you need support to do it then any internet forum is probably the wrong place.

Goldiegirl

Araboo27 wrote: »

Interesting point and I do agree with you BUT I don't think watching TV has any benefits so why have one? They can watch it when they visit family/friends or at school, we can go the cinema if there's a film they want to see. They can access the internet to research anything they need to or can use it to watch educational programmes or documentaries. I'm not suggesting a blanket ban on all technology and return to a little house on the prairie type lifestyle!! lol ;-)

Why drive the kids out of the house to watch TV at their friends house, when they could be watching God knows what, with no control or guidance?

Wouldn't it be better to have the TV at home, so you can have a chance to keep some sort of parental control?

cte1111

I just wondered why you had one in the past, if you're so certain that there is nothing to be gained from them?

I enjoy watching TV; I also enjoy sewing, going out on our boat and lots of other activities. I can't really see the point in banning one activity arbitrarily. Can see the money saving potential, but then will you end up spending on other activities instead?

My children are older than yours, they know that they have to ask before going on the computer or putting the TV on. I keep an eye on what they are watching and viewing on the computer and have no problems in saying no to anything that I think is inappropriate, it's part of my job as a parent.

One of my uncles decided that they weren't going to have a TV, when I was a child. My cousins were about the same age as me. Whenever they came over to our house, my uncle would watch sport on our TV!

Araboo27

Unfortunately I do find some comments very rude and unnecessarily critical, agree to disagree? I wrote this post to find out if anyone else was 'living simply' not to defend myself. What a waste of time!

poet123

Araboo27 wrote: »

Interesting point and I do agree with you BUT I don't think watching TV has any benefits so why have one? They can watch it when they visit family/friends or at school, we can go the cinema if there's a film they want to see. They can access the internet to research anything they need to or can use it to watch educational programmes or documentaries. I'm not suggesting a blanket ban on all technology and return to a little house on the prairie type lifestyle!! lol ;-)

I think that there are very many educational progs on TV, and if you steer them in that direction they will benefit.

That said, there is (as they get older) a place for mindless diversion, everyone needs down time. Provided they have ground rules in place (homework first, taking part in sports etc) then it has its place imo. By removing the TV though (and with boys especially) you take them outside the xbox//ps3 loop and that is not to be underestimated as a social tool.

I am the mother of fours sons and a college lecturer, and the computer game is the common ground, the teenage male bonding point. You can't turn back time, it is what it is. To remove that ( albeit parentally regulated) outlet is to put your children outside their peer group.

My sons have all played their share of games but not to the detriment of their studies or sports. Three are adults with good professional careers and the youngest is hopefully destined for medical school next year.

So, for what is is worth I can see where your concerns lie, but for me the solution would be in moderation not removal. It is in using the tv/game consoles in the way you see fit. As for the language, you just lay down rules and stick to them. If you reiterate them often enough they will eventually do a Pavlovs Dog!!

A quick anecdote. My youngest never heard a swear word in our home, we don't use them. He did hear them in school and in y7 burst through the door in floods of tears. He had got a dentention. I said it can't be so bad did you forget your homework? He handed me the slip between sobs, it read xx has to do detention because he used bad language.

I fixed him with a steely eye and said "I take it back it can be that bad" I wanted an explanation, and he gave me this; the school was expecting the visit of a renowned poet (;)) and he was so looking forward this, at break he heard the visit was not going ahead and within hearing (but not sight) of a teacher said "oh !!!!, I am so disappointed" The teacher appeared and he paled visibly and was given a detention of 30 mins.

I told him off, gave him the disappointed mother speech and took the detention slip from him. I signed it, crossed out 30 mins and put 1 hour and sent it into school with a note saying that I felt the punishment was not enough and that if there was a recurrence they should feel free to double it with my full support. I have never heard him swear since.

Of course it has now become a family joke.... but the point was well made.;)

Araboo27

Goldiegirl wrote: »

Why drive the kids out of the house to watch TV at their friends house, when they could be watching God knows what, with no control or guidance?

My children are aged 1, 4 and 6 - I can safely say there would be no 'driving them out of the house!! They only visit friend's houses if I am with them, they're not at the age where they venture out alone, lol.

Goldiegirl

Araboo27 wrote: »

My children are aged 1, 4 and 6 - I can safely say there would be no 'driving them out of the house!! They only visit friend's houses if I am with them, they're not at the age where they venture out alone, lol.

Maybe not now.... But give 'em a few more years!

arbroath_lass

Araboo27 wrote: »

Unfortunately I do find some comments very rude and unnecessarily critical, agree to disagree? I wrote this post to find out if anyone else was 'living simply' not to defend myself. What a waste of time!

Perhaps the internet is not the place to find anyone living as "simply" as you seem to want to? Can you not see the irony in that?

Araboo27

cte1111 wrote: »

I just wondered why you had one in the past, if you're so certain that there is nothing to be gained from them?

I enjoy watching TV; I also enjoy sewing, going out on our boat and lots of other activities. I can't really see the point in banning one activity arbitrarily. Can see the money saving potential, but then will you end up spending on other activities instead?

My children are older than yours, they know that they have to ask before going on the computer or putting the TV on. I keep an eye on what they are watching and viewing on the computer and have no problems in saying no to anything that I think is inappropriate, it's part of my job as a parent.

One of my uncles decided that they weren't going to have a TV, when I was a child. My cousins were about the same age as me. Whenever they came over to our house, my uncle would watch sport on our TV!

Lol, sounds about right!! I'm not certain...this is more of an idea that I'd like to try and see how it goes. There is so much research I've read through and it all just makes sense to me. To be honest, it will probably result in a reduction in how much they watch at the moment rather than a complete ban. It not just for their benefit either, I'm a nightmare for checking my emails and texting etc throughout the day which I really want to move away from....

I've had a TV in the house all through my life and it's not 'harmed' me in any way....I don't think!!

Araboo27

Goldiegirl wrote: »

Maybe not now.... But give 'em a few more years!

God, I can't wait for that - a couple of hours of peace and quiet will be heaven!!