Manager work issue

claire16c

I thought I was being thick but apparently not

Op your post is written in such a confusing way and in an odd manner, it makes no sense as to who is saying what to whom.

Maybe English isn't your first language but if you are working at a fairly high level and running projects surely it must normally make more sense than this!!

Goldiegirl

OP perhaps you could come back and start at the beginning, and tell us clearly what the story is and what the problems are - I don't think anybody has understood your post

sharnad

What was that about?

eschaton

Amanda23 wrote: »

Met my boyfriend at company, works for a different team to me,. My bf got involved with a new project, travelling to US with manager. Few months later I got asked. I was so excited, great opportunity. I worked hard and in UK I moved over to new project.


Manager asked bf if I could return to US as was needed. At lunch/dinner felt that the manager felt uncomfortable around us. On the Saturday manager text BF, asked if we'd had dinner. Manager said we were too far away to meet and BF thought he was annoyed by something.


The next week, manager spoke of next visit plans to my BF only whilst I was there and asked him to book his flight/hotel. Felt sad I wasn't going again and a little ignored/unwanted especially as I thought my role was so needed. BF bluntly told me he didn’t expect me to return either. Felt at meetings, he was saying no to my ideas/suggestions where he always seemed all for them. Bumped into him on Saturday, we chatted and then he thought we were trying to get rid of him. Later invited him out and he said he was ill, our tour on Sunday was cancelled, still ill, but saw him in town from a bus !


On way to company meal, manager jokingly asked if I wanted to return. I joked back in a nice way as was taken back/surprised. BF thought he was just joking too. Wine was being drunk, manager saying to others or to me how I didn’t want to go back etc I emphasised I never said No. After meal he suggested more drinks, manager was saying how I could work in Hong Kong for a time for example if project was a success and the bonuses that could be had.


That final week, I couldn’t say anything right. Other team members thought my ideas were good but no they weren’t happening. Some work I had carried out on my own initiative (liked by another team member) wasn’t happening, He wanted the old way. We nearly got into an argument. His body language was saying come on lets argue. Subject got changed. Later, I got very upset speaking to boyfriend and was looking forward to not returning.


In UK, after a meeting manager called me back and said joking aside, with his head bowed, I know I've joked but did I want to return. He thought I was really useful out there but thought/felt I didn’t want to be there sometimes. I did mention about the mixed messages I felt I received about my return but he didn't say anything.


As much as I don't want to go, I want to see through the final stage of the project. My relationship with my BF is breaking as we talk work 24/7 and end up arguing. I'm really not sure what the next 3 weeks will bring and I'm confused and hurt.

Thank you

And thank you for giving me a sore head.

Is there another version of this story that makes sense or is this all we are getting?

Errata

sharnad wrote: »

What was that about?

Nasty hangovirus?

Brallaqueen

BF gets a job opportunity, OP gets same job opportunity, Manager is upset about something and favours BF above OP, OP feels unwanted, BF seems to act funny and a bit two faced not supporting OPs ideas in front of the manager then I got lost