a little update

Confusedheart

Hi all,

Just a little update.

Sunday OH admitted he had feelings for a girl at work. Although said he loved me and is confused.

Sunday night after he finished work he said he'd been thinking and that he'd never cheat on me. He said he was confused and that he doesn't think he likes the girl in 'that' way. Just she pays him a lot of attetion and is nice to him. He says he was just confused and that the feelings werent the same as when hed met me and he likes her as a friend. Shes the first girl friend hes actually had so maybe a possibility that confused him.

New problem - I cant get this out of my head. He refuses to let me talk about it. He expects me to just forget he ever said it.

Could you get over your OH saying that?

Cotta

I think he has some more explaining to do. You're right to not be satisfied and why on earth did he bring it up in the first place if there was nothing more to it?

Personally I would take a short break in the relationship but that is just me and then come together for a proper discussion.

Whatever you decide - good luck.

Bazey

What you really need to know is whether the other girl is hotter than you. This could happen time and time again a bit of new crumpet starts at his work.

If she's bang tidier than you then you need to dump him.

maman

Cotta wrote: »

I think he has some more explaining to do. You're right to not be satisfied and why on earth did he bring it up in the first place if there was nothing more to it?

Personally I would take a short break in the relationship but that is just me and then come together for a proper discussion.

Whatever you decide - good luck.

I can understand that he might be musing on the new experience of having a female friend but deciding to 'think aloud' was immature and selfish IMO.

aileth

I've just skimmed your other thread.

Honestly, seems like he is f**king you about and keeping you there while he gets his ducks in a row and decides whether he's going to elope with this other lady.

Or, he admits he has feelings for her on Sunday, asks her at work on Sunday if she wants to do the horizontal shuffle, she rejects him, all of a sudden, "No of course darling, I'd never cheat, I only have eyes for you, I was totally confused about how I felt."

Pull the other one.

Jenny484

I haven't commented yet but I was following your initial thread. The first thought in my head when I read your story was "another woman". I think you need to remove yourself from the situation. He is taking you for granted. This might make him realise how much you mean to him. That is of course....if you still want him.

Right now he is probably keeping his options open with you and stringing you along in case the other woman doesn't work out.

Jenny484

Aileth my thoughts exactly.

LEJC

Hes got feelings for someone else and at the moment hes not sure what she makes of him...

Hedging his bets IMO

clearly fancies her but if she doesntfeel the same hes still got you as a fallback...

Win win to him.....or so he thinks

Why dont you show your hand now and show him the door.....

If your relationship was solid then she would be nothing more than a co worker,clearly in admitting he has feelings for her is an indication that all may not be well in the relationship you have with him.

Errata

Hedging his bets? It sounds more like having his cake and eating it.

tinkerbell28

No, I'd dump him. But that is me.

You'll always in life pass opportunity IMO to cheat, or get closer to someone than you should. It's the beauty of being human. If he can;t handle a woman flirting with him, then he's a no go-er.

I also think he "went for it" and got kicked back.

marywooyeah

I'd show him the door otherwise you're always going to be wondering what he's up to and you'd have to live knowing you were the second choice in his eyes. You're worth way more than that x