Regret number of kids?

anotherMaggie

I would love to hear opinions of over 50s on whether their lives would be better or worse now if they had more or less kids.

I'm wondering whether to have a third and while of course there are the obvious money and time factors what I'd really like to know is what it might be like as we become an older couple; would 2 probably visit more as they would have grand comfort and space at home or might it be best to have more kids and then up our chances of more grand kids etc? I know you just can't tell how it might work out but would like to hear opinions of those with adult children as its v easy to say how great kids are when they're still cute and cuddly.
Thanks.

zygurat789

anotherMaggie wrote: »

I would love to hear opinions of over 50s on whether their lives would be better or worse now if they had more or less kids.

I'm wondering whether to have a third and while of course there are the obvious money and time factors what I'd really like to know is what it might be like as we become an older couple; would 2 probably visit more as they would have grand comfort and space at home or might it be best to have more kids and then up our chances of more grand kids etc? I know you just can't tell how it might work out but would like to hear opinions of those with adult children as its v easy to say how great kids are when they're still cute and cuddly.
Thanks.

It would have saved me a lot of money if we had not had 3. We had no tax credits and no tax relief we had to pay thehole lot out of our own pockets.
But is this really a moneysaving subject?

chesky

What a strange question. Perhaps you should think more about the number of children affecting the overall world-wide population, rather than how they will look after you when you're old and grey. After all, your children don't necessarily owe you anything - they may all emigrate thousands of miles away, in which case you'll be on your own anyway.

pollypenny

We originally wanted four kids, but stopped at two when I went off to do a degree.

They grow so quickly, we do wished we'd had at least one more. Our family is getting smaller.

lazer

chesky wrote: »

What a strange question. Perhaps you should think more about the number of children affecting the overall world-wide population, rather than how they will look after you when you're old and grey. After all, your children don't necessarily owe you anything - they may all emigrate thousands of miles away, in which case you'll be on your own anyway.

Or perhaps you should think of the ageing population in the UK, more children will be good for the UK in the long run

3 children is not a large amount on the grand scale of things re:world-wide population.

tanith

I have 3 and I think for me its a perfect number , one lives permanently abroad but we visit as often as we can I certainly don't expect any of them to visit as they all have busy lives and children of their own but I see the 2 who live nearby often and we speak on the phone or FB all the time.. they all have children and they are a joy to us even though they range in age from 26 down to a few months..
It does seem a rather odd question though.. you could have 4 children and they might all be childless you can never tell how life is going to pan out..

LilacLillie

I had 2 (now in their late 30's) and was sterilised because I knew we couldn't afford any more, even though I always 'imagined' 3.
The only 'benefit' was the old family allowance of a couple of quid.
I then wanted to adopt but DH didn't.
My SIL died leaving a young daughter and I thought number 3 might have been her, that also wasn't to be, she went to her Dad.
We have 3 grandsons, 6, 6, & 2, that have come late in our lives (our son's wanted to be able to afford them and be married), that we see all the time.
I haven't heard anyone for years say that they 'can't afford to have any more children' they just seem to have them??????
As for coming to visit in your old age, there is and never was any guarantee of that.
LL

Errata

In a fairytale world gownup children will visit their parents a couple of times a week, ring them every day, and distemper their ceilings.
In the real world ..................

duchy

Wow I lived in a fairytale and never knew it ...or maybe a near fairytale I never distempered the ceiling although I did paint a few for them though.

Seriously though I did speak to my parents almost every day - mostly lived close enough to visit at least once a week often more-even when I lived further away it was usually once a month, it isn't unusual in my experience -depends on the family though.

retiredlady

I came from a family of eight kids and it was something I decided quite young I didn't want for myself. I stopped at two but I did regret it and would dearly loved to have had a third. By the way I know we were very poor growing up financially but I can honestly say I didn't notice it at the time!

John_Pierpoint

http://www.breathingearth.net/
I would put a tax on child number three.
Do you really want your grandchildren to live in a fairly land like this:

Or on the edge of a continent like this:


Forget Hadrian's wall, the Great Wall of China, The Berlin Wall; you are looking at the ramparts of fortress Europe. It is becoming hard to say which side is the side of greedom.
http://electronicintifada.net/content/walls-being-built-all-sides-fortress-israel/11520