Affording to have a baby

Alikay

If you have no debts and can pay the mortgage and other necessary bills you should be able to manage. Other costs like clothes, food, entertainment and holidays tend to go down when you have a children as your lifestyle changes.

TeamLowe

fluffnutter wrote: »

Once you're past the initial outlay for things like a carseat, somewhere for the baby to sleep and a pram they don't cost much, particularly if you breastfeed and resist the temptation to dress them in expensive outfits (they shit all over them) or buy them toys (they're not interested). The nappies they use are easily covered by child benefit (assuming your OH doesn't earn more than £60K).

You'll never go out again once you've got a baby, you don't buy any new clothes because you're a funny shape and you've got no time for books or new music so you'll probably find your expenditure dramatically reduces.

If you have no debt and you want a baby, have one. Life's too short to worry excessively about money and once you have kids it will feel even shorter.

I keep thinking you need to write a book with all your sage advice on the whole baby experience, from trying to them being around. I would like to see the word mooer in print one day

OP I (like everyone else in the world thinks about themselves) think my DH and I did things the right way round, in that we thought about what we want out of family life, two or three kids with the option for me to stay at home with them, and made our financial decisions based on that.
For example, the bank said on our combined wage we could get a mortgage for £250k. we've just bought a little 3 bed terrace for £97k, which means the mortgage payments and household bills are easily affordable on DH's salary alone.
Of course, we're lucky in that we live in the North so cheaper house prices and DH is on a very good wage indeed for someone of his age.

In comparison, I know a woman who's desparate for kids but 'can't afford them' as she's mortgaged up to the hilt as just spent a lot on a kitchen extension (not needed, just wanted a bigger kitchen), has a holiday a year that would come in the 'dream' category in between holidays to Italy at least twice a year and both her and her husband have very expensive cars and are always eating out at fancy restaurants.

If kids are a priority to you, make them a financial priority as well, if you can. If those decisions have already been made and it'll still be hard, then it'll be hard but you'll manage and your kids will be none the wiser. Don't think any of us who were brought up on a low income are worse off for it and I for one had a very happy childhood

notanewuser

Bangton wrote: »

I had a baby 3 weeks ago. When I found out I was pregnant in January this year I thought we'd be screwed financially. However, because we'd (luckily) paid some debts off we had quite a bit of disposable income meaning although we'd have less money we could make the SMP work by cutting into this disposable income and accepting it was no longer disposable!!

I earn around £900 on maternity leave as work top up the SMP with 10% of my annual wage and I opted out of my workplace pension for 3 yrs so I get paid this as part of my salary until LO goes to school so this also topped up the SMP. I also get full pay anyway for three months. It could be something your workplace does too.

Did you take advice about that? That is going to make a HUGE difference when you retire.

LannieDuck

sulphate wrote: »

This is not something OH and I are thinking about atm but we want to have a baby within the next 5 years probably. I'm sure this topic has been done to death on here so apologies. I have spoken to several friends over the years who say "if you waited til you could afford children you'd never have them".

We have no debts other than a small mortgage (well, small in comparison to some) and student loans. Neither of us earn a fortune, not to support the other 100%. Saving up to cover maternity leave is feasible, what happens after that? I haven't looked into it enough but I doubt we'd be eligible for anything other than child benefit. Both sets of parents have offered to help us if we had a baby so we would have minimal childcare costs, so one of us would work part time... I still don't think that would be feasible financially. Currently we can save a reasonable sum per month so I am not concerned about the cost of things like prams, cots etc (which can easily be bought cheaply anyway) - my main concern is the drop in income which would be around £800 a month.

Yet we are still in tough economic times and almost all the women I know who are between the ages of 25-35 have either had a baby within the last year or are pregnant now.

Genuine question - how do people do it?

Thinking about these things in advance is very sensible. It sounds to me as if you're in a pretty good position to manage, actually.

You can cover maternity leave, then you have the potential of part-time work and minimal childcare costs. So you'd probably end up with 1 1/2 salaries, free childcare from grandparents, child benefit, and possibly child tax credits?

If you can save a reasonable amount over the next 5 years (or however long before you decide to have a baby), you should be able to cover the baby costs no problem. And perhaps your salaries will rise a little during that time too?

thriftylass

I think everybody can afford kids if they want to. It's up to you what you want them to cost. For us the biggest spend is childcare (£1000 a month atm, 2/3 of my income, going down to £500 next year due to DS going to uni nursery) and we still have number two on the way (together they'll prob cost my salary in chidcare but only for a year). We got most clothes, beds, toys etc second hand (apart from the car seat, that was new). As we don't have anyone close by like grandparents we have to fork out loads of money to pay for childcare but opted for it so I can keep my career going too which will have benefits in the future (part time is not possible). We just make the most of the time we have together (quality over quantity I guess).

You're life style changes dramatically. I still can't believe that before children we were skint at the end of each month (going out mainly) whereas now with childcare and me having a slightly lower salary than before we are able to even save money. Other spending aspects change too. I plan my food shops better, look for deals or make my presents nowadays. I buy cheaper clothes (as mentioned above, they get ruined by puke or crawling on your knees anyway) and shop around more for better utility bills etc which I didn't do before.

If you think too much about it there is never the right time. Also consider your age and that it might take ages to actually conceive (DS took 18 month after a miscarriage and number 2 took 10 months).

Okydoky25

Something to consider as well is how many you ant. We were more than prepared for 1 child but as soon as I was holding him I knew 1 I wasn't going back to work anytime soon and 2nd I wanted another and asap.

It's been a struggle going from 2 good salaries to 1 and from 0 babies to 2 in 2 years but we cope. No more holidays abroad. No nice cars. Budgeting the bills and food shopping is a must and savings have gone out the window for now but my god I would give up all that and more again to have my boys and to be at home with them.

Things I've saved money on without thinking are little things like cancelling the window & bin cleaner. Shopping around for insurances rather than taking the renewal. (Assuming if your on this site you do this anyway?)
No longer do I clothes shop in expensive shops and rarely high street tbh it's primark & tesco now. No one sees you for most of the week and you get covered in sick & poo
Local Afb selling pages are great for picking up baby bargains and selling stuff you no longer need as well. Wish I had known about them with my 1st!

Prothet_of_Doom

Me and my wife, did all sorts of calculations when I was earning £15K and her £12K and we worked out that we needed an income of £20K (in 1991) in order to survive, but a guy at work told me to save like mad, try and live on that £20K and save the rest, because technically we'd never be able to afford having kids. Whilst spending 12 months trying to have a child and the remaining 9 months, we saved £7K. Then we attempted to live on my salary of now £16K.
We couldn't, but we had those savings, but 20 years later I wonder what all the fuss was about.
The problem is that having kids is a massive financial and emotional commitment, and you will never be ready.
I see alot of 30 something graduates, who want to make sure they are at a particular point in thier careers (both male and female) who are living a DINKy lifestyle, and personally I don't think the delay is that healthy.

hgotsparkle

I have the issue that my OH wants to be in the position that we can afford to have children, but I don't ever see us being able to afford it. My argument is that you just find a way to cope financially. My overly broody self is still not winning.....

thriftylass

hgotsparkle wrote: »

I have the issue that my OH wants to be in the position that we can afford to have children, but I don't ever see us being able to afford it. My argument is that you just find a way to cope financially. My overly broody self is still not winning.....

Exactly, if he's waiting for that you'll never have kids as you always think you can't afford it on your current life style as you usually don't change it before hand. Although the way Prophet of Doom did it is a great test. Maybe he is not ready and uses that as an excuse. Because if you want kids you make do. (unless your debt repayment are eating 50% of your salary it would be a bit different). Also the older you get the more comfortable you get in your ways and having all your money to yourself etc......

hgotsparkle

thriftylass wrote: »

Exactly, if he's waiting for that you'll never have kids as you always think you can't afford it on your current life style as you usually don't change it before hand. Although the way Prophet of Doom did it is a great test. Maybe he is not ready and uses that as an excuse. Because if you want kids you make do. (unless your debt repayment are eating 50% of your salary it would be a bit different). Also the older you get the more comfortable you get in your ways and having all your money to yourself etc......

We have no debts, just renting a very small place that is council tax free as its the cheapest option. We're both mid 20s but he thinks around 30 is the right time. He does always say 'when we have a baby....'.