Dilemma over sons mobile?

Melonade

LEJC wrote: »

In fairness you posted the comments about your son being assulted after I had made the comment over not accepting calls from friends mobiles..I think perhaps what you should try and encourage him to do is make calls from his phone not friends phones...

is he being bullied at all...other son went througgh a phase where he wouldnt take his phone to school or switch it on because he was receiving a few uncalled for texts ....it might be something to consider.

I'm sorry I didn't mean it to sound like it did. I actually agree with what you said. Infact I did tell him after the assault that I've told him over and over to use his own phone to call me. Also he went onto a contract after it happened (if I remember right) because he had used all his credit so didn't take the phone with him.

I'm pretty sure he's not being bullied, but it's something I can talk to him about, Thankyou

pops5588

There's no point in shouting and screaming at him, I don't get why you're about to "flip your lid". Just maybe calmly ask him to try and not be as forgetful when it comes to the phone as it is useful in emergencies and you never know when you're going to need it. Why all the drama?!

And if there is an emergency, he will let you know somehow if he can. You don't need to call him after school everyday just to check nothing bad has happened.

P.s. I've been there being the kid whose parent gives them a phone and says "I want to hear from you x times a day" and getting berated for not doing so when I didn't even need the phone in the first place. It feels rubbish.

P.p.s actually why are you even looking through your son's room like that if you have no specific concerns to do so? If the phone was off it wouldn't have rung so you clearly went through all his stuff to be able to find the silent phone under his pillow?

sacha28

How did we ever get through life as children without mobile phones?! How did you contact your parents when you were 14?

Just to pick up on one point....he's allowed to take a mobile into school but it's not allowed to be switched on? So what's the point in taking it in?

I would personally cancel the contract and get a free PAYG sim card. I think you may be clouded by misplaced anger. Your son is 14 and isn't permanently attached to a mobile.....great! If he needs to get hold of you he does.....great! He's sensible and uses another form of communication if he's going to be/wants to be late.....great!

Sounds like you have a very sensible young man to me

Scrapaholic

I'd stop the contract as you're paying for something he doesn't use . Get him a cheap PAYG for emergencies . £120 a year is a lot of money to waste !

Melonade

pops5588 wrote: »

There's no point in shouting and screaming at him, I don't get why you're about to "flip your lid". Just maybe calmly ask him to try and not be as forgetful when it comes to the phone as it is useful in emergencies and you never know when you're going to need it. Why all the drama?!

And if there is an emergency, he will let you know somehow if he can. You don't need to call him after school everyday just to check nothing bad has happened.

Lol I'm not about to scream and shout at him :rotfl: I had the conversation with him yesterday when he didn't take his phone again. It's getting old to go over the same thing every day with him.

I'd have to start a new thread about his other antics lately for everyone to understand why I'm about to "flip my lid"

I did say earlier that I don't mither him on the phone or call him everyday after school. But sometimes I'm not here when he's due home and have to let him know. He doesn't have his own key because he's lost one already.

sacha28

Melonade wrote: »

Lol I'm not about to scream and shout at him :rotfl: I had the conversation with him yesterday when he didn't take his phone again. It's getting old to go over the same thing every day with him.

I'd have to start a new thread about his other antics lately for everyone to understand why I'm about to "flip my lid"

I did say earlier that I don't mither him on the phone or call him everyday after school. But sometimes I'm not here when he's due home and have to let him know. He doesn't have his own key because he's lost one already.

So leave one with a neighbour?

krlyr

I'm not sure I agree with punishing him for not having his phone on him, but I think you're right to not spend out on a new contract/better phone if he can't be trusted to look after it. I would probably let the contract come to an end and if he wants to use the phone, he has to get a PAYG sim and top it up himself (do things to earn pocket money, or get a part-time job). Ditto if he wants a fancy phone, it's a great lesson to teach teenagers that they have to save for things IMO - I think they appreciate it and look after it much more if it's cost them time/effort/money!

nzmegs

We had a similar problem for a while. I got into a habit of asking my son each and every morning if he had his phone with him and making him put it in his bag before he left the house. Eventually it became a habit.

Of course, forgetting to charge it, switch it on after school etc are now the issues - but we will get there!

I think that a cheap pAYG which you look after and hand him every morning might be a good idea. You can charge it yourself, top it up when necessary and put it in his bag. Job done and he can leave his own phone at home whenever he likes.

nzmegs

We had a similar problem for a while. I got into a habit of asking my son each and every morning if he had his phone with him and making him put it in his bag before he left the house. Eventually it became a habit.

Of course, forgetting to charge it, switch it on after school etc are now the issues - but we will get there!

I think that a cheap pAYG which you look after and hand him every morning might be a good idea. You can charge it yourself, top it up when necessary and put it in his bag. Job done and he can leave his own phone at home whenever he likes.

Melonade

pops5588 wrote: »

P.p.s actually why are you even looking through your son's room like that if you have no specific concerns to do so? If the phone was off it wouldn't have rung so you clearly went through all his stuff to be able to find the silent phone under his pillow?

Are you for real or even have a clue what actually happened?

I rang his phone good 20 minutes after school finished (his school is a 1 minute walk from home) and it went to voice mail. I thought he's either still got it switched off because he's doing football after school or hasn't taken it.

I then walked straight upstairs and into his room, lifted his pillow and found the phone!! That quickly!!

Did I say I rifled through his room to find the phone? Maybe you imagined I went in police style doing a drug search... dragging out drawers and flipping the bed upside down, maybe even lifting the carpet up after I'd checked behind the pictures on his wall?

Anyway I've just spoken to his grandad about it (who knows him a lot better and knows how he's a been acting lately) and he agrees that he's been taking the p*ss and it's the one thing I insist on from him.

My own fault really, unless you know he's a spoilt brat that thinks the world revolves round him and thinks he's hard done to no matter what he is bought/given and can be very immature I suppose anyone would stick up for him :rotfl:

Maybe "would you pay £10 a month for someone to not use the phone?" would have been a better question lol