Even a basic wedding is so expensive!

Erinnire

I was thinking about this recently. I found a lovely cheap venue for the reception but I've moved away from it now... So if I can when it comes round I am going to try and hire a cottage with big grounds for a weekend. It will cost roughly the same as a reception venue I think about £1000 but I very rarely see my family and loved the idea of us all getting together and spending the weekend celebrating. We aren't big drinkers or party people so can stick some gazebos outside, music in the kitchen/lounge/dining room and everyone can just relax and enjoy. The boys can BBQ or something.

Although that is all dependant on whether I can find somewhere that would let me do that!

Gloomendoom

Erinnire wrote: »

I was thinking about this recently. I found a lovely cheap venue for the reception but I've moved away from it now... So if I can when it comes round I am going to try and hire a cottage with big grounds for a weekend. It will cost roughly the same as a reception venue I think about £1000 but I very rarely see my family and loved the idea of us all getting together and spending the weekend celebrating. We aren't big drinkers or party people so can stick some gazebos outside, music in the kitchen/lounge/dining room and everyone can just relax and enjoy. The boys can BBQ or something.

Although that is all dependant on whether I can find somewhere that would let me do that!

That is effectively what we did. It wasn't a reception in the traditional sense, just a big garden party that went on until the early hours. It also meant that we didn't have to worry about keeping to exact numbers of guests or having separate day and evening guest lists. We provided a field for guests to camp in if they wanted to. Quite a few people made a weekend (or longer) of it.

scmp

Gloomendoom wrote: »

That is effectively what we did. It wasn't a reception in the traditional sense, just a big garden party that went on until the early hours. It also meant that we didn't have to worry about keeping to exact numbers of guests or having separate day and evening guest lists. We provided a field for guests to camp in if they wanted to. Quite a few people made a weekend (or longer) of it.

This is what we are doing.
Got a cheap deal on an old farm with barns, having a hog roast, camping available all weekend and garden games. We are outdoors people and we went to a folk festival in North Wales this summer and that is exactly the style we are going for
70 adults and 20 children put the frighteners on doing a sit down meal in a hotel!!!

BlushingRose

Thanks all, lots to think about there.

I'd really like a church blessing (wouldn't feel right getting married in church as fianc! is divorced) but that's just more expense).

I know what you mean re: food - was planning to ask for money towards a honeymoon as a wedding present, then based on any amount will depend upon where in Britain we went.
Dress - I'm plus size, so not as easy to get a nice dress second hand although there are a few out there.
Don;t want the moon, but want it to be nice - house not big enough to have people back here, so either very small family and a few friends or everyone...lots to think about x

BlushingRose

oops, managed a double post somehow!

sharnad

Second hand wedding rings are nice you can get a good one for £50. Decide if you can afford a sit down meal or buffet adterwards and you needn't have a reception

ostrichnomore_2

I think it's difficult to ask people for actual cash towards the meal, or to buy their own.

I have been to a wedding where we were all asked to take along picnic food to share - the couple provided bottles of homemade wine plus some beer but if you wanted anything else you also had to take that - and it was one of the nicest weddings I've ever been to! Everyone shared out their food, it had a very nice relaxed atmosphere, and the day was a lot of fun.

so don't be scared to do something unconventional.

Likewise I've been to a couple of 'community halls/plates of sandwiches and sausage rolls' weddings as well, with cash bars, and they were fun as well.

The fancier weddings I've been to are very nice, can't deny that, but overall as a guest I've been so busy feeling thrilled for the couple and happy to be there, that I don't think the cheaper options are second best in any way.

Stephb1986_2

What do people think about including a gift list in the evening invites?

BlueMoo

Hi Stephb1986 - Gift lists are tricky and having read a few of the forums here, they seem to be very divisive.

However in my experience most people really appreciate a gift list. I know I have been to plenty of weddings and it really is helpful to know what sort of things the couple like/want. So many people now live together before they get married, that often the traditional toaster/kettle just isn't an appropriate gift. This can make it difficult to know what to get, so a gift list is invaluable.
If you feel awkward putting a list in, you could just write a small note with the website of the gift list on it.

ostrichnomore_2

Rude. Well, it breaks accepted etiquette. If people want to know about gift list/registry then they ask for the info.