Twins birthday party

Toto

Quick question. My daughter has been invited to a set of twins birthday party. The whole class is invited, so about 30 or so kids. I was just about to buy an arty kind of gift on amazon but I'm not sure if I should buy a gift for each of the kids or one between them. I'm sure the children would prefer one each but would the mum? This could potentially mean 60 presents for the girls to open.

On an entirely separate note but I might as well ask while I'm at it. I'm having a party for my daughter soon, again the whole class, hall etc. Now she isn't a girly girl at all, she likes spiderman, lego and generally everything that's traditionally thought of as boy. The last thing I want is a whole bunch of barbies or pink plastic gifted to her, is there any way I can hint that she's a bit of a tom boy? She would appreciate any gift and would be thankful but I know it wouldn't get played with, she doesn't get the point in dolls at all.

Would you notice if the invitation was a boyish one and think perhaps a book or something is safer? I'd actually really prefer it if there were some sort of donation to a children's charity rather than a whole lot of gifts, or even no gift at all but I don't think that would happen, I think the gift giving is too ingrained.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

I'd get the children a present each.


And, for your DD, I'd probably have a theme - something like a Superhero Party, which will give a pretty good clue to all but the daftest parents that My Glittery Pony Unicorn Sparklecar Hairdressing Set isn't the best choice of present.

Mojisola

Toto wrote: »

I'd actually really prefer it if there were some sort of donation to a children's charity rather than a whole lot of gifts, or even no gift at all but I don't think that would happen, I think the gift giving is too ingrained.

Some American families are already doing this -
https://www.parents.com/fun/birthdays/themes/party-for-charity/

Be a trendsetter and do the same!

gingin_2

It gets expensive but I'd get them a gift each. My daughter's twin friend's mum would always invite it on behalf of the twin my daughter was friendly with the most and make it clear that we shouldn't feel we had to buy the other twin a present. I haven't written it as eloquently as she put it across but I always really admired her for the way she did it - it was very thoughtful.

Does your daughter have something she likes, a theme, say dinosaurs, or trains? If someone sends an invite with a theme I normally base the present around that if I don't know them or their tastes very well

pmlindyloo

Toto wrote: »

Quick question. My daughter has been invited to a set of twins birthday party. The whole class is invited, so about 30 or so kids. I was just about to buy an arty kind of gift on amazon but I'm not sure if I should buy a gift for each of the kids or one between them. I'm sure the children would prefer one each but would the mum? This could potentially mean 60 presents for the girls to open.

On an entirely separate note but I might as well ask while I'm at it. I'm having a party for my daughter soon, again the whole class, hall etc. Now she isn't a girly girl at all, she likes spiderman, lego and generally everything that's traditionally thought of as boy. The last thing I want is a whole bunch of barbies or pink plastic gifted to her, is there any way I can hint that she's a bit of a tom boy? She would appreciate any gift and would be thankful but I know it wouldn't get played with, she doesn't get the point in dolls at all.

Would you notice if the invitation was a boyish one and think perhaps a book or something is safer? I'd actually really prefer it if there were some sort of donation to a children's charity rather than a whole lot of gifts, or even no gift at all but I don't think that would happen, I think the gift giving is too ingrained.

As a mum of twins (now grown up) please give each child a gift and a separate birthday card They are individuals and should be treated as such. They will probably be opening them at the same time so won't take any longer!

Can you imagine sharing your birthday with someone and sharing presents? Don't know how old the girls are but birthdays are special and sharing is hard when you are young. In fact, the only time I like sharing as an adult is when it's a meal for two or a theatre visit.

What is it about twins that people see them as a pair all the time? My particular hate was the 'how are the twins?' as if they didn't even have their own names! and as for twin cards - they should be banned!!!!!!!!!!!!

applecrumble24

Two children, two presents.

I'd take the hint from the invite, but agree with the superhero theme if you're unsure.

bluenoseam

I'd also perhaps give the kids in her class more credit - the chances are they know she's not exactly the pink sparkly stuff kind of girl, but yeah the superhero party is a pretty good idea.

Toto

pmlindyloo wrote: »

As a mum of twins (now grown up) please give each child a gift and a separate birthday card They are individuals and should be treated as such. They will probably be opening them at the same time so won't take any longer!

Can you imagine sharing your birthday with someone and sharing presents? Don't know how old the girls are but birthdays are special and sharing is hard when you are young. In fact, the only time I like sharing as an adult is when it's a meal for two or a theatre visit.

What is it about twins that people see them as a pair all the time? My particular hate was the 'how are the twins?' as if they didn't even have their own names! and as for twin cards - they should be banned!!!!!!!!!!!!

I very much agree they are 2 individual people. It really was a volume thing, I suddenly thought, this poor woman could be faced with 60 presents, that's huge!

Ok, 2 presents it is

Toto

Superhero party is a great idea. I'll go with that I think. Thanks

Toto

Mojisola wrote: »

Some American families are already doing this -
www.parents.com/fun/birthdays/themes/party-for-charity/

Be a trendsetter and do the same!

This is a really good idea. I wonder if having a box for people to donate gifts for shoe box appeals or toys for disadvantaged children at Christmas would be an idea. I really do like the charity idea. My daughter doesn't need lots and lots of things and so much of it seems such a waste. She's getting the couple of things she really wants for her birthday, plus a party. I think giving to others is a valuable thing to do. I thought maybe the toy appeals would help her to visualise what she is giving.

I don't want to send her to therapy in later life though... my mum made me give away all of my gifts!!!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Toto wrote: »

This is a really good idea. I wonder if having a box for people to donate gifts for shoe box appeals or toys for disadvantaged children at Christmas would be an idea. I really do like the charity idea. My daughter doesn't need lots and lots of things and so much of it seems such a waste. She's getting the couple of things she really wants for her birthday, plus a party. I think giving to others is a valuable thing to do. I thought maybe the toy appeals would help her to visualise what she is giving.

I don't want to send her to therapy in later life though... my mum made me give away all of my gifts!!!

If she's into Marvel characters, she'll understand that with great strength comes great responsibility. So she can be a superhero to kids who don't have the wonderful things she does.




[can you guess the sort of things I was into as a kid - and still am now? ]