Desperate. Worried I may do something stupid.

Own_My_Own

You can put all your details in here to make sure you are getting all the benefits you are entitled to.

http://www.turn2us.org.uk/benefits_search.aspx

HTH OMO

xe0n

Firstly, I try not to lecture you and tell you why do you have two kids, plus one from a pervious relationship and one on the way on that kind of salary, but it's too late and I can see you're trying really hard to rectify things and give your kids a good life

[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]Thanks,Yes, I know. Unfortunately i was not the most mature of people a number of years ago. My daughter in Birmingham was from when I was 17. She is not a mistake as she is my world but unfortunately not with the right person. She cheated...... ah well. At-least I met the woman of my life and we are happily (well nearly happily) married with two wonderful kids. (one of which is my step son, my wife and I had similar past experiences..)[/COLOR]

Rent: 750 (Paid upto date) Your right the area might be expensive and moving isn't cheap either but that's nearly half you joint income

I know, living in the South is not nice. I am a midlander originally but moved down south 5 years ago with the missus. Its still our only option at present as we cant do another move yet.

Council Tax: 130 (Missed the last 2 months)

Electric: 150 (Missed the last 4 months) Way too high even if everything is electric, or does this already include a repayment plan for previous debt?

[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]Nope that is per month we have had the landlord check over the house for faults with a sparky as we are out all day, so how can it cost that much is beyond me. 95% of our electronics are low powered items or portable so minimum charge required.

To pay the "usual" and what is owed they are asking for c.£200 PM which is impossible.[/COLOR]

Water: 45 (Paid upto date)

My car insurance: 120 (cheapest available and 100% required for work) £120/month still sounds an aweful lot but I guess it depends on the car, your age etc.

[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]I only have one year NCB with cars, (only been driving a car for a year, its nothing fancy, an old 2005 Citroen C4 [ex CAT C right off so worth nothing resell value]) so until next year NCB in March14 I need to bite the bullet.

The real car insurance figure is £113 per month and the other 6.99 per month is my motorbike insurance (I have 6 years no claims for motorbikes), I did put in the last post that the bike is not mine to sell, its lent from a family member for emergency transport. Unfortunately there is no sidecar for the kids! nether the less its still a way to cut down on weekly fuel bills running @ 60mpg compared to the car 35mpg.[/COLOR]

Wife car insurance: 80 (Going to be off road in October) Good, that'll save a bit for a while

Internet/Mobile/Landline: 52 (Total cost for all 3, all upto date as internet is required for my job) when does your contract end though?

[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]It was an 18 month contract that started January 2013, so 9 months. [/COLOR]

Fuel (ME): 200 per month (work commute)

Fuel (wife): 80 per month not anymore from October I guess? [COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]yup[/COLOR]

Child Care: 60 per week, 240 per month.

Food: 350 per month (feeding 4 people, one dog) See previous advice, cook from scratch, Aldi and LIDL are you new best friends etc.

[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]Taken onboard, the reason it costs more, and I know some will find this amusing here but I CANT COOK lol, my wife makes amazing food but recently with her being ill and myself looking after the house etc its been ready made meals ....
[/COLOR]

My bank charges: 30 per month

Wife Bank charges: 25 per month

Ccard charges: 15 per month.

Traveling to see my daughter (set by courts) £60 per month (she lives 160 miles away each way)

Student loan payments: 20 per month.

All the best and keep your head up

thriftylass

xe0n wrote: »

Electric: 150 (Missed the last 4 months) Way too high even if everything is electric, or does this already include a repayment plan for previous debt?

[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]Nope that is per month we have had the landlord check over the house for faults with a sparky as we are out all day, so how can it cost that much is beyond me. 95% of our electronics are low powered items or portable so minimum charge required.

To pay the "usual" and what is owed they are asking for c.£200 PM which is impossible.[/COLOR]

Could you get a smart meter? Check some other boards for advice on this. They should be free (I think, depending on you electricity supplier) and tell you which appliance uses how much. Especially now with no heating and the hot water maybe on a timer etc it should be lower. Take regular meter readings, which I guess your doing anyway. What tariff are you on? We pay £55 for 3 people in a detached house just now (summer) and that includes electricity and gas. What appliances do you use daily etc (oven, washing machine etc)

Your doing great. I really hope you feel better soon and things improve for you and your family.

DreamerHelen

I didn't want to read and run....

I can only echo what other people have said - Please please Call Step Change or CAP....and also change to a Basic Bank Account with a Bank that you owe no money to....that way they can't take any money from you....

I hope things settle down for you hun....I'll be thinking of you... x

AlexLK

xeon - I didn't want to just run from this post. However, I am not in the right state of mind to respond to this at the moment but I will do my very best to write a decent response tomorrow.

AlexLK

xeon: I apologise in advance for the incoherence of my post but here goes my response as promised:

*Please do listen to the people on this post who have much better advice than I could regarding your situation.

*If you have things that are worth a significant amount of money if you were to put them up for sale please do. I know it is difficult as I am having to sell quite a few things I am attached to in order to clear my own debts.

*Stop taking out these payday loans! Honestly, so long as you are ALL fed, the other stuff CAN wait until you get paid.

*I would be inclined to make sure you are also getting all the benefits you are entitled to, you are on a very low income so should be able to receive some help.

*Another thing that could be worth looking into is if you could maybe go on the waiting list for a council house until you have got yourself back on your feet. I don't know how this works so perhaps somebody else could help with this?

*As far as your rent goes, always try to keep up to date. Priorities in my mind are food first, rent second. However, it would not be particularly easy for a landlord to evict you and your family quickly.

*Write to ALL your creditors with an attached SOA, including the utilities and council tax.

*Start to look for a better paid job.

lhead123

Just a quick note to say... My neighbour is a Virgin salesman. I've spoken to him and he says that although you are tied into a contract with them, you can upgrade OR DOWNGRADE at ANY time throughout your contract, that includes TV, Internet, phone and mobiles. So it might be worth your while phoning them up and downgrading to the most basic TV package and reduce your Internet and phone too. That should save you a fair bit every month x

dancingfairy

xe0n wrote: »

Hi all.

---

BILLS COMMITMENTS PER MONTH

---

Rent: 750 (Paid upto date)

Council Tax: 130 (Missed the last 2 months)

Electric: 150 (Missed the last 4 months)

Water: 45 (Paid upto date)

My car insurance: 120 (cheapest available and 100% required for work)

Wife car insurance: 80 (Going to be off road in October) this will help

Internet/Mobile/Landline: 52 (Total cost for all 3, all upto date as internet is required for my job)

Fuel (ME): 200 per month (work commute)

Fuel (wife): 80 per month this will help

Child Care: 60 per week, 240 per month.

Food: 350 per month (feeding 4 people, one dog)

My bank charges: 30 per month [COLOR="rgb(255, 0, 255)"]ignore for now[/COLOR]

Wife Bank charges: 25 per month [COLOR="rgb(255, 0, 255)"]ditto ignore for now [/COLOR]

Ccard charges: 15 per month. [COLOR="rgb(255, 0, 255)"]ignore for now [/COLOR]

Traveling to see my daughter (set by courts) £60 per month (she lives 160 miles away each way)

Student loan payments: 20 per month.

There is maybe some more than above, however that is what I can think of right now. Again I know I have messed up and I need to fix this and get it under control and I don’t know who to turn to or who to talk to. My health and most importantly my wife’s health and our unborn child AND children are all suffering due to this stress and I feel like the worst person on earth, its my job to fix this somehow but I don't know what to do, im scared about all of-this and I am worried with my current health issues I may end up doing something stupid and I don't want to do that to my family.

Many thanks for taking the time to read this.

Xe0n.

Desperate

O.k so your essential outgoings (excluding your wifes travelling expenses which will end soon and her car etc and all the charges) are 2117 a month. Hopefully any benefits you are entitled to will cover any shortfall here, and will you be needing childcare if you wife gives up work as she is pregnant? That would obviously save you a massive amount per month.
You need to calculate accurately your income, including any benefits you are entitled to as a starting point.
You need to set up a new basic bank account (no credit check) with a bank not connected with anyone you owe money to. Your priorities to be made are obviously rent, council tax, water etc.
Contact one of the debt charities for help and assistance. Several have already been suggested - CAP, National Debtline, StepChange or CAB for example. You may want to set up a payment plan to your creditors but it is vitally important that you are in control, and you set the amount you can afford to repay each month (not the creditors) otherwise you will end up in a worse mess. Your priorities to catch up on first should be council tax and water I think it was? If everybody else has to accept a token payment of 1 pound per month then they will have to like it or lump it. DO NOT under circumstances give out details of your new bank account to set up a DD or give out your card details to any of your creditors.
Best of Luck
df

[Deleted User]

dancingfairy wrote: »

Your priorities to catch up on first should be council tax and water I think it was?

Shouldn't electricity take priority over water, because, AIUI, they can cut off the electricity, but not the water?

Maitane

I'm afraid I don't have anything new to add really except seconding the advice here about getting yourself a budget in order, checking that you're getting all the benefits you're entitled to and looking at ways to cut down on spending.

Also, have you heard of the Skint Foodie? In a nutshell, the writer suffers from mental health issues and loves food - it's a healer for his soul whilst on the cheap because he receives benefits. Between that blog and the Old Style board on here (a very friendly bunch), you can get some tips for the kitchen.
The Old Style board also has some tips about other household areas to save on like cleaning.

Good luck to you, well done for facing up to the situation and I truly hope that it goes well for you. Remember that if you're feeling low or need some advice, come back here as there will always be suggestions, support and helpful tips for you.