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Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.
Comments
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It's not so bad since I changed practices, been given some different pills to try, at least this time I'm not rigid with the fear of losing control. Mind, she could treat me any time she wanted.
No, it's plastic that compels me to spend, doesn't feel like "real money", not that using cash stops me entirely.2018 totals:
Savings £11,200
Mortgage Overpayments £5,5000 -
Friday 3rd January, 2013.
Day 128.
Dear Diary,
Today has been really quite mixed, on the positive side I've secured an order with the customer from yesterday, son has spent some quality time with his mother and the doctors visit was not so bad. However, on the negative side I'm not feeling very well again, my wife has gone out for the evening and I have not quite managed to put four hours into the business.
Next week Mrs. K. goes back to work and son goes back to nursery 3 afternoons per week, so I'm sat here reflecting on the past 10 days. Generally, things were not as good as they could have been and if I'm truthful I'm somewhat annoyed today to see my wife enjoying her newly found money. There, I've admitted it, I'm somewhat jealous.
On the debt busting front, I'm sad to say I have yet again managed to get absolutely nothing done.
Two things to be thankful for:
A no spend day on my part.
I managed to lose myself within a book for a couple of hours - quite a feat for somebody whose concentration has been awfully low for a good couple of years.
Summary:
+£30.00 Music.
-£0.00 NSD.
Yours Faithfully,
Alex.2018 totals:
Savings £11,200
Mortgage Overpayments £5,5000 -
Thank you, I can't say I much like the idea of senior school being started at 11 as I think it's too young.
Hi Alex
Happy New Year to you.
I am rather surprised by your views on education at 11. To give you some context, I went to one of the *best* private girls' schools in the country at the age of 11, having attended a wonderful state primary school. It was ok to start with, but I did not really fit in, was bullied and could not wait to get out of there. They were not interested in me because I didn't want to be a doctor or lawyer (fellow musician!). I receive information from there about what amazing things my class-mates ended up doing, and each time I think: you may be a great doctor/lawyer/whatever, but you were not a nice person. On the other hand DH went to the local comp because his parents had no idea that the state grammar school was free :eek: He ended up teaching himself one of his A level subjects, but still has a PhD and many research papers to his name.
With our daughters, I looked at every primary school in the area, state & private. The girls both went to an excellent nursery so had a flying start to their education. In the end we chose a small village school with 10 kids in each year and mixed-age classes. Yes, there were some less desirable kids there, but my 2 had enough sense to avoid them. The friends they made there are still friends now, even though they are 14 & 12. I kept reviewing our choice, and when we moved house, looked at the local school, but stuck with our original choice.
By the age of 10, both girls were fed up of primary school. They needed the challenges that secondary school posed. We gave them the choice of where they wanted to move to, which luckily was the same as ours! They started at a state grammar school at 11 and haven't looked back.
I have been doing some part-time teaching in a local prep school. There are some lovely kids there but they are no more lovely than my daughters' friends. Equally, there are some who are only interested in what car or phone you have, and use that as the basis on which to judge. Sorry but that's not what I wanted for my children. They get to 13 thinking they know it all, and have a rude shock when they move on to public school. At 11 they are less arrogant, and in my experience (I teach mostly 11-18) mature far more quickly in the secondary environment.
Don't keep getting so hung up on sending little K to your old school. It may have been wonderful then, but as they say in the adverts, "past performance is no guarantee of future success"! He needs to learn all the life-skills that you and his nursery are working on, and then he'll be fine wherever he goes. You should do as others have said and go to visit as many of the options as possible. For me, that first phone call booking an appointment was a huge clue as to the nature of the school. One refused to yield on a visit time by 10 minutes as both DH & I were teaching/lecturing so couldn't be there for 2pm, but 2.15 would have been fine. They refused to see us at 2.15 - school ended up in special measures not long after. Another asked if we could go at 9.30 instead of 9 because "the Head takes assembly in church for the whole school and it doesn't finish til 9.15, then they all need to walk back". That was the one we ended up with.
Sorry, this is an essay! You have plenty of time to choose, so choose wisely. Now is the time for your DS to mix with a variety of other kids. If he's bright and motivated, he'll get into any school at 11 (or 13), you'll have saved a fortune and done something different from your parents. They have had their chance, now it's your turn with Mrs K, so enjoy!0 -
Hi Alex
Happy New Year to you.
Happy New Year also.I am rather surprised by your views on education at 11. To give you some context, I went to one of the *best* private girls' schools in the country at the age of 11, having attended a wonderful state primary school. It was ok to start with, but I did not really fit in, was bullied and could not wait to get out of there. They were not interested in me because I didn't want to be a doctor or lawyer (fellow musician!). I receive information from there about what amazing things my class-mates ended up doing, and each time I think: you may be a great doctor/lawyer/whatever, but you were not a nice person. On the other hand DH went to the local comp because his parents had no idea that the state grammar school was free :eek: He ended up teaching himself one of his A level subjects, but still has a PhD and many research papers to his name.
My views are only based on my own experiences and personally, I was not ready to move on from prep at 11. However, I was not a child who was particularly keen to "grow up", nor did I know what I wanted to do with my life. I did get on with my peer group well at the time. (What instrument(s)?)
I'm still in contact though do not see my old class-mates, however, almost all have done much better than I. Can't say I was a "nice person" in school, nor now really although these days I at least try. People change; some of the bullies may no longer behave in the same manner and may well deeply regret their actions.
Good for your husband, I would have loved to have taken my education further.With our daughters, I looked at every primary school in the area, state & private. The girls both went to an excellent nursery so had a flying start to their education. In the end we chose a small village school with 10 kids in each year and mixed-age classes. Yes, there were some less desirable kids there, but my 2 had enough sense to avoid them. The friends they made there are still friends now, even though they are 14 & 12. I kept reviewing our choice, and when we moved house, looked at the local school, but stuck with our original choice.
By the age of 10, both girls were fed up of primary school. They needed the challenges that secondary school posed. We gave them the choice of where they wanted to move to, which luckily was the same as ours! They started at a state grammar school at 11 and haven't looked back.
I have been doing some part-time teaching in a local prep school. There are some lovely kids there but they are no more lovely than my daughters' friends. Equally, there are some who are only interested in what car or phone you have, and use that as the basis on which to judge. Sorry but that's not what I wanted for my children. They get to 13 thinking they know it all, and have a rude shock when they move on to public school. At 11 they are less arrogant, and in my experience (I teach mostly 11-18) mature far more quickly in the secondary environment.
With all due respect, I do think girls are ready for secondary education earlier. However, it sounds like you've got two daughters who will do well. As far as I am aware there are no state grammar schools in my area, not looked into it that hard though.
I was one of those children who judged,, admitted my family are about as nouveau as they come so no surprises there really and yes I did get rather a shock myself at 13.
Don't keep getting so hung up on sending little K to your old school. It may have been wonderful then, but as they say in the adverts, "past performance is no guarantee of future success"! He needs to learn all the life-skills that you and his nursery are working on, and then he'll be fine wherever he goes. You should do as others have said and go to visit as many of the options as possible. For me, that first phone call booking an appointment was a huge clue as to the nature of the school. One refused to yield on a visit time by 10 minutes as both DH & I were teaching/lecturing so couldn't be there for 2pm, but 2.15 would have been fine. They refused to see us at 2.15 - school ended up in special measures not long after. Another asked if we could go at 9.30 instead of 9 because "the Head takes assembly in church for the whole school and it doesn't finish til 9.15, then they all need to walk back". That was the one we ended up with.
My main issue is trusting he will be fine and that my wife and I are good enough parents. Thank you, yu have confirmed my thoughts in certain areas.Sorry, this is an essay! You have plenty of time to choose, so choose wisely. Now is the time for your DS to mix with a variety of other kids. If he's bright and motivated, he'll get into any school at 11 (or 13), you'll have saved a fortune and done something different from your parents. They have had their chance, now it's your turn with Mrs K, so enjoy!
Thank you, I suppose it's not so easy with my situation with parents, I have to admit I do not wish to explain myself to them when they have offered to cover all the costs for his education.2018 totals:
Savings £11,200
Mortgage Overpayments £5,5000 -
So you have earned from music and had a no spend day. You have gained an order (that you didn't expect to). To me that is a win. So how is that not debt busting? You may not have actually paid off a debt but you have set the wheels in motion for it to happen. What more do you expect of yourself? Realistic expectations are the way to go with this and you have achieved them. If you try for unrealistic outcomes you are only going to disappoint yourself and land up in an ever-decreasing spiral - that is not the way to go!! Do you realise how well you have done, how much you have achieved since you first started on here? If you don't, then there are many reading who do - that's why we are still here - rooting (sp) for you.0
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So you have earned from music and had a no spend day. You have gained an order (that you didn't expect to). To me that is a win. So how is that not debt busting? You may not have actually paid off a debt but you have set the wheels in motion for it to happen. What more do you expect of yourself? Realistic expectations are the way to go with this and you have achieved them. If you try for unrealistic outcomes you are only going to disappoint yourself and land up in an ever-decreasing spiral - that is not the way to go!! Do you realise how well you have done, how much you have achieved since you first started on here? If you don't, then there are many reading who do - that's why we are still here - rooting (sp) for you.
It's not debt busting as I will not use that money to pay off the debts.
I expect to try and sort my life out after what has been nigh on five years of doing nothing. When I first set the business up I didn't take it seriously, it was a bit of an excuse really and well, being a "company director" sounded better than "unemployed". Frankly, it was nothing but a title to give myself whilst still trying to live the lifestyle until the cars went, that's when I started believing the business could actually achieve something.
Though I agree on the unrealistic outcomes, it is quite a problem for me - always has been and I've no idea how to stop having unrealistic expectations.
Thank you for the encouragement though.2018 totals:
Savings £11,200
Mortgage Overpayments £5,5000 -
Hi Alex
Happy New Year to you...
...You have plenty of time to choose, so choose wisely. Now is the time for your DS to mix with a variety of other kids. If he's bright and motivated, he'll get into any school at 11 (or 13), you'll have saved a fortune and done something different from your parents. They have had their chance, now it's your turn with Mrs K, so enjoy!:TUtterly brilliant post, Madmel!:TFWIW Alex, all our local kids from Year 6 (III form) seemed more than ready to move on to secondary school, with no noticeable difference between the boys & girls in adapting to life in the "big pond"! During a chat with other mothers, we were all astonished at how our DC's had adapted & generally got a grip on life so quickly: doing homework on their own, catching buses, not forgetting half their possessions at school each day & not having to be reminded 500 times to get gym/ school bag etc...
Of course if the pastoral care is pants at the secondary school, the kids will suffer but they would if it were at prep school too!
You both need to chuck your preconceptions out of the window, write a joint wish list of what educational & pastoral criteria are essential / desired & then go inspect everything available, of course if they are rude & unhelpful on the phone like in Madmel's post, then no need to bother, eh?!
But you've got plenty of time before secondary school worries - just keep a weather eye on the options for now!:)0 -
Granariesgirl: Thank you. We have plenty of time, indeed. Funnily enough my parents have been on the 'phone this morning, saying we should transfer our son to my old school for nursery. We didn't send him there as the "day" finishes at 3.20pm and if I recall correctly it was very expensive for him to stay later. Now he's settled at the current nursery, enjoys it and is getting on well. I also realise I was pushing a bit too hard with trying to get him to be better than what is predicted for his age. It seems to have done him good to be away from me some of the time.
I was a day pupil so didn't have to worry about forgetting things as I was at home during the evenings. No bus to catch either as my parents always planned around my schooling, I plan to drive son to school and we will not consider him boarding until 13, then it probably won't happen, so not much to worry about with regards to pastoral criteria.
I do know what I want with regards to educational criteria from a school.2018 totals:
Savings £11,200
Mortgage Overpayments £5,5000 -
Hello Alex!
Just popping in to wish you a lovely weekend!
I shall rather not talk about education in England! :-) ha ha ha!
My kids go to a state school! They both are fluent in English, French, and Spanish! One is in year 8 and has achieved 7a in all her subjects and my 10 year old has 6as, he is maths genius ha ha ha!! He loves a book owned by his dad, Engineering Maths by Stroud! Ha ha ha
They are very young and they have travelled around the world already!
As far as I know, EDUCATION starts at HOME!!
Regards,No debts 🙌0 -
Couldn't resist telling you about an article in Tatler. It's about how you can succeed in life by going to a state school and it lists the top ones. Admittedly if you look at it with a professional eye it's a bit of fluff about how various 'celebs' have made their way in the world and reflects the postcode lottery that is education. But my granddaughter goes to one of them!:rotfl:
I'm delighted that you're happy to leave LittleK settled in his current nursery but, for the future, you do need to make an informed choice.
P.S. On a more serious note, while I don't know the context of the call from your parents, might they be angling for LittleK to go for more days/longer hours as they're finding him tiring?0
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