Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

heartbreak_star

Hurrah, you're getting the moneysaving buzz! Great feeling isn't it

HBS x

AlexLK

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Okay Alex, I'm going to put my nasty mean tough-love sports coach head on.

GO BACK TO THE DOCTORS. It has been said before, but you need some professional help - depression really is making you see negatives.

At the moment, you seem to be stuck in the "oh, I'm a failure at EVERYTHING" mode and sometimes it's making you sound like a melodramatic teenager

As Eleanor Roosevelt said "No-one can make you feel inferior without your permission". You need to stop giving that permission, and some professional help might sort that.

Okay, mean head off

We all have blips on our journey (although as a Northern lass the fact a pub meal can be £40 shocks me, lol). You can't do anything about it now, so let it go Hope the food was good though - and here's a secret...whenever it's OH's turn to cook we mysteriously end up with a takeaway, so you're not the only one haha!

It really does take time to get into an MSE mindset. Have you cut up all your credit cards etc? Sometimes doing something symbolic like that can help.

Lots of continued good luck and good wishes!

HBS x

EDIT: Oh yeah - enjoy that wine, savour every sip!!

HBS: So sorry I missed this post before: perhaps I was posting at the same time

Thank you, I am starting to see that my behaviour is perhaps not entirely "normal", the last thing I want is for my son to grow up seeing me in the state I got myself into both yesterday and today. Doctors is being rang on Monday, that is not to say I don't feel sick with nerves at the thought of actually going in though.

LOL, am I only a pretend Northerner then? As far as the cooking goes, I didn't get let off tonight for the meal out last night. I made a lasagne from scratch (OK, OK the pasta was bought) and we all really, really enjoyed it. Making it wasn't all that bad either.

Yes, I cut the cards up (even though I couldn't use them anyway). We have a count down on our fridge from the £32,000 we owe to £0, Mrs. K. says if anyone comes round we can just tell them we are raising funds for a bigger house or for renovations as she knows I am rather embarrassed about the debt.

As for the wine it has both been savoured and saved, looking forward to the other half tomorrow evening

7roland8

AlexLK wrote: »

Funnily enough my father's grandfather was an Irish immigrant. Nothing to be proud of there

Nothing to be ashamed of either. I'll bet he had a really hard life and had to survive loads of struggles.

Glad you got through the first week ok - and well done on the lasagne. Also its good every so often just to use up whats in your cupboards and freezer.

AlexLK

7roland8 wrote: »

Nothing to be ashamed of either. I'll bet he had a really hard life and had to survive loads of struggles.

Glad you got through the first week ok - and well done on the lasagne. Also its good every so often just to use up whats in your cupboards and freezer.

Oh my, I've just read that back myself and that was not what I meant . I meant my wife says I'm a terrible snob and there's nothing to be proud of there. From posting on this board and speaking to people of all different backgrounds (some of which, I admit I would perhaps not normally speak to) I have realised as per the Wonga entry that it is wrong to judge others before actually knowing them.

I'm not ashamed of my ancestry, even though I know I am descended of paupers rather than the gentry. Yes, I once had a massive issue with it but not for some time now.

We have been doing that hence such a little amount spent on groceries this week!

bess1234_2

A man that can cook is a very sexy thing.

I have never had the will power to leave another glass of wine. Another thing on your positive list.

Born a pauper, will die a pauper, but the clever paupers in this country are still ruled by the rich but dim. Public schools get you in the old boys network, nothing else at all. Welcome to the clever but normal class . It's so much better :T

7roland8

bess1234 wrote: »

Born a pauper, will die a pauper, but the clever paupers in this country are still ruled by the rich but dim. Public schools get you in the old boys network, nothing else at all. Welcome to the clever but normal class . It's so much better :T

Saw programme on Workhouses - Charlie Chaplin was born in one - his mum committed to Asylum - be made it and got her out.

Also saw one on all those Private school types who go to Oxford and do this certain degree - then into Westminster as assistants and then become MPs - now what life experience is that - talk about a cloistered world.

AlexLK

bess1234 wrote: »

A man that can cook is a very sexy thing.

I have never had the will power to leave another glass of wine. Another thing on your positive list.

Born a pauper, will die a pauper, but the clever paupers in this country are still ruled by the rich but dim. Public schools get you in the old boys network, nothing else at all. Welcome to the clever but normal class . It's so much better :T

There is no end to my talents.

I didn't think I had until I realised it was a toss up between scoffing the whole bottle now or getting to enjoy a glass tomorrow.

7roland8 wrote: »

Saw programme on Workhouses - Charlie Chaplin was born in one - his mum committed to Asylum - be made it and got her out.

Also saw one on all those Private school types who go to Oxford and do this certain degree - then into Westminster as assistants and then become MPs - now what life experience is that - talk about a cloistered world.

"PPE" by any chance, LOL?

fc123

AlexLK wrote: »

Well after a rather awful start to the day, it has not ended anywhere nearly as bad.

In response:

wegle: Thank you for this response, I am going to book into the doctors next week. Today, I completely flipped out after our neighbour's son was spotted for the first time in ages and he innocently asked if I'd sold my Range Rover. Well, to say I took it the wrong way would be an understatement. Feel rather stupid now about that.


Lannie: Monday is the big day to speak to the creditors so I shall have more news on that front then, an initial letter has been drafted to each of them explaining I am in financial difficulty. I have been a little naughty in attaching my original SOA though as I'm hoping for the interest to be frozen.



fc123: Thank you so much for all your help.

My main business has some online presence, nothing on the teaching front though this has been going less than a week. Not sure about organising concerts yet, it's an awful lot of work and frankly I'm struggling with feelings of being overwhelmed as it is at the moment.

The chairs are on Mrs. K.'s list of things I need to get rid of. Will be sad to see them do but I suppose the £800-900 will be better off our debts.

Yes, exercise has been suggested in the past. Fortunately, that has been happening recently with the walking which is also saving money.


.

Eh? What did you say to him about the car that was so bad...it can't have been that bad?

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No, I know, it's too much for now as every idea is being planted and it's just week 1. But it's one for a future day if you need to rustle up more customers.

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Good luck Monday. If you have time watch an episode of The Call Centre' on catch up. I know they sell diff stuff but the actual call centre won't be much different. It's a good image to have in your head if they are being difficult. (;))


Do not make a payment over the 'phone. When the interest is frozen and the DMP set up (they can email you), you will pay the 1st instalment. If they are difficult just say, ''oh well, thanks for trying. I'll take it directly to the Ombudsman instead and see if they can persuade you to make an arrangement''. You may get transferred to a supervisor.
Be NICE + sweet the whole time as I did nearly lose it with one once and it didn't help my case.

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I think Mrs K and I would think alike on some things

AlexLK

OK so here goes with the diary ...: (I really do need some amusing stories over the next week to make it a little more easy going, as I promised it would be in the first place).

Saturday 7th September, 2013.
Day 6.

Dear Diary,

Yes we are up to six days now and I cannot quite believe just how time has flown, it was this time last week I asked for help in regard to my debts and justify reasons I "needed" a bottle of wine a night and a collection of expensive pens to you all, who were having NONE of it!

Today has once again been eventful for reasons both good and bad but all in all mainly good. Not to mention I GOT MY WINE! Hmmm, I enjoyed that glass of red so much I decided I couldn't possibly forgo tomorrow; so the bottle has gone back half full (shall we say to keep on a positive note) to consume the rest tomorrow. I call that a win, win situation.

Staying with the positives, the V8 Land Rover is going to a new home at the end of next week and whilst my business has stumped up £1,000 to exchange it for a diesel one of similar vintage, it will be paying much less out in fuel from now on. I even got a pat on the back from my business partner for this decision for he had long hated funding my 12MPG truck. The diesel drove almost identical to the petrol and was only missing a few ponies; not to mention the new truck has only 61,800 miles on the clock whereas the previous V8 one had 125,000, again, I call that my second win-win of the day.

Which swiftly brings me onto the less positive aspects of the day; I have realised I can be a real pompous idiot at times: looking over the "peasants" of this world from my lofty position of pretend wealth carved from numerous sources of finance I cannot pay for and previously from my overly generous parents . I cannot face even an innocent question of whether I have hit on hard times and am personally offended that anybody in real life could ever suspect I don't have so much as a pot to p*ss in with all my debts taken into account. Frankly, I have come to the conclusion I need to grow up. There are people in this world, hell even this country who are struggling to keep a roof over their head not bemoaning they cannot buy yet another expensive trinket piece and run a car which does an abysmal 12MPG. However, that said, just how do people deal with the guilt one faces when reading some of the posts on here? I almost offered one poster money that I most certainly do not have as I felt so disturbed by the situation they were in.

Summary:
I'm declaring a Spend Free Day (YAY, my first) as the car was agreed between my business partner and I as a business purchase.

Yours Faithfully,
Alex.

AlexLK

fc123 wrote: »

Eh? What did you say to him about the car that was so bad...it can't have been that bad?

---

No, I know, it's too much for now as every idea is being planted and it's just week 1. But it's one for a future day if you need to rustle up more customers.

---

Good luck Monday. If you have time watch an episode of The Call Centre' on catch up. I know they sell diff stuff but the actual call centre won't be much different. It's a good image to have in your head if they are being difficult. (;))


Do not make a payment over the 'phone. When the interest is frozen and the DMP set up (they can email you), you will pay the 1st instalment. If they are difficult just say, ''oh well, thanks for trying. I'll take it directly to the Ombudsman instead and see if they can persuade you to make an arrangement''. You may get transferred to a supervisor.
Be NICE + sweet the whole time as I did nearly lose it with one once and it didn't help my case.

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I think Mrs K and I would think alike on some things

I didn't say anything awful to him, I just made myself look a complete fool.:mad:

Thank you for all your advice thus far.

Will watch "The Call Centre" on repeat. Advice re. dealing with the banks / collection agencies duly noted. Hopefully, we are on our way to making our first payment. Another improvement over last week as I was honestly hoping somebody on here would tell me not to worry and just to carry on ignoring it all.