This Time I'm Really Going To Do It

LadyWithAPlan

Well done on getting the past paid off and now to look forward to your new happy life!

On the gluten free - I went on and off Gluten for years as its hard especially when you travel. I knew I had an issue but sometimes it was easier to yes in the short term and feel awful.
 The only way to do it I think is to go completely strict for 3 months and then see how you feel.. maybe keep a diary.
For me I would never go back - i feel so much better in every way. - even though having to say no to loads fresh baked cookies and cakes when I travel is hard, the pain and discomfort of having eaten GF is not worth it.

I made the mistake of watching on the plane yesterday an interview with Dr Daniel Amen - the brain doctor... it actually might be the last straw on me being able to 100% give up my sweets and crisps - apparently its so bad for your brain ... argh 

ajmoney

Watty1 said:

Paid my accountant for filing the Capital Gains Tax £300 and paid the tax bill which was just shy of £15500 and just like that my savings accounts are depleted and everything to do with the ex is now ticked off and done.

I had until the 12th to pay but I wanted this done as it was the final piece of drawing a line under matters with the ex and the 1st of the month seems a great day to start afresh.

WattyDog has a trip to the groomers then I am planning a small bottle of something fizzy and an early night to celebrate.   60 mile an hour winds forecast overnight so the bottle of fizzy will be very small just in case of an emergency tonight.   

I now feel I can really plan to rebuild savings and come up with a financial plan for the future and of course enjoy the life I have built.

We could have our own little re-build saving plan Watty, different circumstances and ways of getting here but we can do this. You are inspiring me to actually do rather than think about doing things x

Humdinger1

You are wonderful @Watty1! Congratulations on your glorious fresh start.  Onwards and upwards love Humdinger xx 

Watty1

Well perhaps not quite so glorious, I picked up WattyDog from the groomers yesterday and burst into tears as I did so.

WattyDog was in a mess, I knew that and I had rung around looking for a groomer to take him in and luckily this place had a cancellation.  The ex had had  his girlfriend do it, and I  knew she was not that thorough but I really believed he was going to take WattyDog and so hadn't really been paying much attention to his coat.  I admitted when I booked him in that he was in a state and when they looked at him they agreed and priced accordingly  (£110 - he is a long haired German Shepherd and we live in the South East so I had thought it would be about £120)

When I went to pick him up he looked years younger, like a teenage dog and was probably half his size!  All the matts I had been trying to comb out where gone, he was soft, fluffy and I just stood and cried.   Partly to get my dog back, partly with relief it is all over and I will admit partly with sadness that the ex who I believed adored this dog will not see him looking so gorgeous.   I imagined how he would have responded in better times and I think I was crying for that too.

The groomers just thought I was overwhelmed at seeing my dog restored and said my response made their work worthwhile and I left them thinking that.  But truthfully it was overwhelm.

As I sat in the living room yesterday, restored wood burner alight, WattyDog asleep from his spa session and my cat snoozing on the back of the sofa and one of those (non MSE) tiny bottles of wine that are about a glass and a half, I felt completely overwhelmed that I had made it to this point.

Watty1

ajmoney said:

We could have our own little re-build saving plan Watty, different circumstances and ways of getting here but we can do this. You are inspiring me to actually do rather than think about doing things x

Yes lets!  Give me a day or two to settle from the overwhelm and I'll come up with my re-build savings plan.  I know I can and will do it and KK is going to remind me to push forwards with the course too hopefully so that will be a start

daisy_1571

Glad to hear wattydog all matt free, his skin will feel a lot better as the matts will likely have been pulling.   Hope now he's done you and him are able to keep on top of it with brushing as thats quite a bill to have every so often.   Give him a wee cuddle from me please when he wakes and congratulate yourself once again that you are dealing with things on your own terms, getting your (metaphorical) house in order the way you want and not having to wonder if, when somebody says they will do something, whether they will.   Thats no way to live your life. 

Like a bereavement you are still going through the 'firsts' so you can tick another thing off your 'first time I...' list.  Next time something good happens with wattydog you won't get overwhelmed,  it'll just be something nice thats happened with you and your dog.

Continu to be kind to yourself

Daisy  xx

Slinky

£120 for your German Shepherd may seem expensive, but it compares very well with my friend's tiny (think no bigger than a sliced loaf) Yorkshire Terrier which costs £40 at the groomer.

Humdinger1

As @daisy_1571 so rightly says @Watty1, this is bereavement and firsts will be painful.   Then it gets better...ex perhaps couldn't help it in some ways but he's a fool. You are worth a better life - which you now have- and so does wattydog, which he has thanks to you.  Love Humdinger xx 

KajiKita

Hugs for the overwhelm. Everyone is right - you are battling through firsts. But with every one of them you learn a little something more about what matters to you and where your values lie, gradually reminding yourself of who you are, piece by piece. WattyDog is lucky he has you as his human 😊

KK 

Watty1

You are so wonderful and helpful.  I had never considered that day as a bereavement and WattyDog going to the groomer was a big first as that would have, in a previous life been something we would have shared and enjoyed.

That makes so much sense that it is a first and a big first so thank you all for reminding me of that.

Hope everyone reading survived the storm. Luckily for us no damage at all although the yard tap broke yesterday.  I cannot blame that on the storm, it has been a little loose for a while.  The barn tap has been broken for over a year and the garden tap leaks badly but luckily I have an "emergencies only" frost free tap in the field that never freezes so was very thankful for that last night.    That was another of those " I so miss the ex" because there is no-one to help out moments and I felt sorry for self but then I realised all I needed was tools and new taps and daylight.  Was so thankful I had found that nice chap to repair the field stop !!!!!! a few weeks ago as the water can be turned on and off now.    Then even more grateful to the VNM who said he would change the tap for me if I went and bought a replacement so yesterday evening £40 spent on 4 garden taps.   That should replace the three that are not working properly and allow a spare.  (I'm not sure he realises he is going to replace all 3 but he will have the tools out so I'm sure I can ask him to teach me what I need to do).