Can you convince a depressed person to get help?

belfastgirl23

I really think helping them to get moving and get out of the house is helpful. If you push for anything too much you're doomed to failure but if you can get them day by day to just take a tiny step further over time you can make a huge impact. My goal longer term would be to encourage them to take up yoga or some form of uplifting physical activity.

It's also worth helping them think about their nutrition, I think it's very easy to get into a downward cycle of feeling awful and eating badly. And eating badly definitely links to feeling bad.

But I wouldn't start with thinking about the doctor - this is a huge step for a person who is depressed. Start with a walk round the park. And make it about you - you need to lose a few pounds or you have a problem with your leg muscle and need to stretch it out or whatever!

Netwizard

Also, a lot of people just plod on through life on anti depressants thinking that this will fix things. I was talking to a staff member only the other day who said she had been on anti depressants for the majority of a 20 year period.

Whilst I work in mental health, i'm not qualified, but i do think anti depressants are not the answer to everything. They are only a short term fix and really people should try and go down other routes like counselling / CBT rather than rely on the happy pills to take care of things.

meritaten

it took a couple of years of me and my kids to convince OH he was depressed and needed to see his GP. I went with him and within twenty minutes she had him on board! she was brilliant. he went because he wanted to prove me wrong! I challenged him by telling him if GP said he was fine I would leave him alone. (I actually meant I would leave as I couldn't stand living with him). he left the surgery with a prescription, another appointment and my support. in six months he improved no end. and his GP saw him every two weeks monitored his progress and I really cant praise her enough. she was careful with his medication and he came off the Seratonin as soon as she thought it was starting to have an 'adverse' effect. I didn't say that she 'talked' to him! she really seemed to understand his issues and a counsellor couldn't have done better - I have trained in counselling and she taught me a lot!

zaksmum

My mother in law was a fantastic lady but was seriously depressed. That was just part of her personality. Nothing anyone said or did made a shred of difference. She wouldn't talk or interact with anyone who tried to help. She would ring several times a day to say how depressed she felt, her opening line being "I'm so down in the dumps...!"

She would fondly recall childhood incidences where a doctor would tell her parents that she just didn't want to live.

She made over 20 suicide attempts by taking overdoses of medication, writing a suicide note and being found and treated just in time, and would announce "It was a cry for help".

Her two sons and her grandkids were demented with worry about her. They tried everything to help her. She was visited every day, taken out for meals, looked after to the best of everyone's ability. No family could have done more.

She developed cancer and suddenly decided she did want to live after all, but sadly the cancer took her.

She was a wonderful mum to her boys and her depression overshadowed the happy childhood memories of her.

Nothing could have reached her to persuade her to get help. She was trapped in her own world with the depression and rebuffed all offers of assistance.

FBaby

The way I got out of depression in my early 20s was by taking very small steps and only focussing on these with people pressurising me to get a move on. One guy especially helped me. He couldn't understand why I felt this way (rightly so) and pestered me to join him to evenings out. I always refused and one day, refusing became more tiring than saying yes, so I went ahead with it, thinking I would just bare it and wait until it was time to come back...except that I surprised myself that I actually enjoyed myself, so it was easier to say yes again the following time. I then use the little energy this gave me to turn towards other areas of my life and again, took it one step at a time and gained a bit more energy and positivism each time until I had enough mental energy to fight the bad feelings.

I had times after that when I felt the dark mist falling over me, wanting to stay in bed and do nothing but cry. I remembered every time that the only medicine that works is to force myself from the start to do the last thing that I feel like doing before my energy ends up completely depleted. It has always worked and after a few days, the mist goes away again.

marisco_2

Netwizard wrote: »

Whilst I work in mental health, i'm not qualified, but i do think anti depressants are not the answer to everything. They are only a short term fix and really people should try and go down other routes like counselling / CBT rather than rely on the happy pills to take care of things.

I agree with this. I think drug treatments can be beneficial, but it's by no means the only answer and shouldn't be relied on long term. People need to be guided to seek alternative ways to work through their depression without drugs. They are more likely to address the route cause of how they are feeling, and to attempt to overcome the issues that way.

paulineb_2

Anti depressants helped me when I was at my lowest point and struggling massively from anxiety. I felt better as soon as I had taken the first tablet. I don't mean a magic wand and everything was fixed but the anxiety lessened and I was able to get on with things

I spent the best part of 15 years suffering from work related stress which had a knock on effect and led to me suffering from anxiety and latterly reactive depression and I firmly believe if I had had a short course of anti depressants when things were at their worst for me, I wouldn't have spent years just existing, plodding along, doing the minimum and not having a proper quality of life

My insomnia also wasn't taken seriously by my GPs even though I was very clear on the fact that when the stress was at its worst, so was my insomnia, getting 2 hours a nights sleep didn't seem to touch a chord with my GPs, I was simply left to get on with it

I did go to counselling, I did exercise, but there were spells and long spells where all I could do was work, eat, sleep and repeat.

Im a firm believer that medication does have its place. I also don't believe it should be relied on in the long term, but if someone does have to take an anti depressant for life so that they don't suffer, its obviously beneficial for them

Because sometimes stress, anxiety and depression are caused by external factors which aren't immediately fixable, mine weren't, but you still need to try and function in the meantime and that can be incredibly tough.

Takeaway_Addict

Netwizard wrote: »

Also, a lot of people just plod on through life on anti depressants thinking that this will fix things. I was talking to a staff member only the other day who said she had been on anti depressants for the majority of a 20 year period.

Whilst I work in mental health, i'm not qualified, but i do think anti depressants are not the answer to everything. They are only a short term fix and really people should try and go down other routes like counselling / CBT rather than rely on the happy pills to take care of things.

Unless she is changing what she is taking they will have little effect now and you're right, they shouldn't be seen as a life choice but more as a crutch in getting yourself better overall.

Racheldevon

As others have said medication has a place, but it's not going to address the route cause. Talking therapies can be hugely beneficial and it's why there's so much investment in the IAPT schemes across the country, however this is CBT based, time limited therapy. For a lot of issues longer terms therapy is needed - there's a huge range of therapeutic models out there from gestalt, psychodynamic, integrative, CBT, etc etc - it can take time to find both a therapists you can work with, the relationship is fundamental, and a model that works for you.

Most towns have low cost counselling services available - google to find the nearest one, these tend to be from £5 per session, aren't time limited and you don't have to be on benefits to access them. Also, many training institutes often have similar services.

There's things like http://www.beatingtheblues.co.uk/ which is a free computerised CBT programme for depression

Also Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy (an 8 week programme) is available on the NHS in partnership often with universities (Bangor, Exeter & Oxford are three flagship centres I can think of), and this is NICE guideline recommended for recurrent and relapsing depression with studies showing it to be more effective at preventing relapse than antidepressant medication.

zouzou

Many, many thanks to all for your replies. I know that everyone on this thread either suffers themselves or knows someone who suffers from this horrible condition. Thank you for your perspectives and for the very useful practical suggestions. Wishing things turn out well for you and your loved ones.