Interfaith marriages-do they work?

Torry_Quine

lostinrates wrote: »

Many 'Christians' are Christians in name only, and go along with a spouse in name only. They are agnostic, or like the music, or just accept it as part of routine. Is that more acceptable than being an over non Christian?

I've read the last sentence a few times but still confused.

However if someone is just saying the right things then the other person has no way of knowing that and can only go by what they they are told.

Torry_Quine

Angelicdevil wrote: »

Oh I see! You only pick the parts of the bible that suit you! Ignore Leviticus et al because it doesn't fit your version of "nice new" Christianity.

Anyway, that's my two penneth and I'll say no more as I know our views on religion are poles apart.

I wish you could see how a loving marriage between two people of different faiths works and how it enriches both people without compromising their inner faith.

I have said on MSE many times as have others why Christians are not bound by many OT 'laws'.

I'm sure that marriages between people of different faiths can work and people can be enriched but it's to me too dangerous a risk.

Angelicdevil

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I'm sure that marriages between people of different faiths can work and people can be enriched but it's to me too dangerous a risk.

I don't understand that, to me that comment makes it sound like your faith is fragile?

lostinrates

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I've read the last sentence a few times but still confused.

However if someone is just saying the right things then the other person has no way of knowing that and can only go by what they they are told.

Over should have read 'overt'.

I think the point is, torry, it doesn't really matter what we are told, or what other people think. People who act as Christians may or may not be them really. If there is a a god, only he will know if they were or not. Just as only he will know if any of us, believers or not, were 'alright'. A lot of people walk and talk like ducks, but are hunters decoys.

Torry_Quine

Angelicdevil wrote: »

I don't understand that, to me that comment makes it sound like your faith is fragile?

Not mine personally at this stage of my life. However I was a fairly new Christian when I married and the 'world' and it's ways can be very inticing.

lostinrates wrote: »

Over should have read 'overt'.

I think the point is, torry, it doesn't really matter what we are told, or what other people think. People who act as Christians may or may not be them really. If there is a a god, only he will know if they were or not. Just as only he will know if any of us, believers or not, were 'alright'. A lot of people walk and talk like ducks, but are hunters decoys.

Totally agree with you here. We can only go by what we are told and trust in that. God himself knows the truth and is the ultimate judge.

I knew someone who herself a Christian and married someone who as you say 'walked like a duck' but turned out not to me and then turned violent (not that violence is exclusive to any one type). Sadly many in her church said that seperating from him and ultimately divorcing was wrong!!:mad: I told her that she had no obligation to him and God did not expect her to remain in the marriage which was a great relief to her.

lostinrates

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Not mine personally at this stage of my life. However I was a fairly new Christian when I married and the 'world' and it's ways can be very inticing.



Totally agree with you here. We can only go by what we are told and trust in that. God himself knows the truth and is the ultimate judge.

I knew someone who herself a Christian and married someone who as you say 'walked like a duck' but turned out not to me and then turned violent (not that violence is exclusive to any one type). Sadly many in her church said that seperating from him and ultimately divorcing was wrong!!:mad: I told her that she had no obligation to him and God did not expect her to remain in the marriage which was a great relief to her.

Well, I think we also have to trust on ourselves, and our own judgement and crucially our ability to accept we might be wrong, and this to change our minds. Some of the best decisions I have made are the ones I have been absolutely convinced were not for me at first....like DH .

I trust my judgment that this is the right relationship for me and I love that our backgrounds are different culturally, in more respects than religion in actual fact. What I saw as complicated dynamics as a child and I now see as excellent preparation for a 'mixed' marriage now...(that I rarely think of as mixed). I love seeing things trough his experiences, and letting him see them through mine, and though we were both used to multiculturalism already, me from travelling a lot as a child, him from being a minority and also travelling but in a different way, we don't feel very multicultural we just feel like 'us'.

ognum

Well I have read through this and the good thing is that those who feel that they can only marry someone of their faith can do just that and those who choose to marry someone of another faith or not marry and live as partners can do that too.

The big problems start when/if others tell people what they can and cannot do.

OPs question is slightly strange because clearly these marriages can and do work, they are all around us. THere will also be some that don't but the key to this is tolerance.

sharnad

Angelicdevil wrote: »

So do you also only wear garments of one thread? Do you never eat pig? Have you stoned your children for being stubborn?

Nah didn't think so.

It's about love, that trumps beliefs.

She's a fairweather Christian that only belives in the part of the bible that suit her though she is still extreme compared to some Christians. She is entitled to her beliefs though.

lostinrates

sharnad wrote: »

She's a fairweather Christian that only belives in the part of the bible that suit her though she is still extreme compared to some Christians. She is entitled to her beliefs though.

Is there need for this sort of thing?

Person_one

Torry_Quine wrote: »

No it wouldn't. I honestly can't get my head round sharing my life with someone who doesn't share the very essence of who I am.

For once Torry, I almost sort of agree with you!

I'm an atheist, and I can't imagine sharing my life or raising children with someone who had such a vastly different outlook and perspective on life and the whole universe. I have lots of friends who are religious, my dad is a Christian of the very vague, non church attending but owns a bible and had us baptised variety and he and my atheist mum are happily married. But my partner? That's different to me, and while it clearly works for other people, I would want someone who shares my world view.

I wouldn't marry a Tory or a cat person either!