Should my daughters contribute to the house?

jackyann

I do think that you need to think about your own finances; then discuss them with your daughters.
I think a lot depends on family values: I come from a background where education was subsidised as it was seen as useful for the future, and my parents (and I, as a parent) thought it was important to concentrate on studying and not be too distracted.
I know that for some of my friends, studying was seen as an indulgence, to be done at evening classes, after you had spent the day earning your living!

I have known students (especially those doing sciences, medicine etc) who really have very little spare time. I have known students who can get part-time jobs that give them good practical experience that supports their learning ( various vocational courses) and I have known some students who appear to do very little.

A lot of families who can afford it, don't take board from working children living at home on condition that they save towards a house deposit / education etc.

So I think a lot depends on how much you can afford to subsidise either daughter; what your family feels is important; and what the consequences are for your daughters.
What I have learned is that it is best if you can discuss & explain why you have arrived at your decision, then stick to it and enforce it!

Kapoww

I stayed at home when I was in Uni, I payed my mum £100 a month (VERY CHEAP) compared to student accomodation which is usually around £80 a week minimum.

Now working full time I pay £160 a month - again very reasonable for everything included.

PintAndAPie

Fatkitten wrote: »

I have now lost CB and CTC and i was wondering how i go about working out how much they should contribute to the house as my wages alone cannot support all three of us?

I don't see what alternative you or they have. If there is not enough money then it's got to come from somewhere.

double_mummy

12.5% of council tax per child
going rate for a room in your area
1/3 of all other bills
1/3 of food
if you clean their rooms £10 per hour
if you do all the cleaning in the house and they dont help the entire time it takes you to clean they pay £3 per hour each

k12479

double_mummy wrote: »

12.5% of council tax per child
going rate for a room in your area
1/3 of all other bills
1/3 of food
if you clean their rooms £10 per hour
if you do all the cleaning in the house and they dont help the entire time it takes you to clean they pay £3 per hour each

Genuine question for you: What do you expect to happen at the other end, i.e. when you're old and need help with things around the house, shopping, etc.? Do you expect your children to do things for free, or to pay them or to pay other people the going rate to do them?

CKhalvashi

k12479 wrote: »

Genuine question for you: What do you expect to happen at the other end, i.e. when you're old and need help with things around the house, shopping, etc.? Do you expect your children to do things for free, or to pay them or to pay other people the going rate to do them?

This was the point I was going to make.

I'll chuck my DD's a fiver for cleaning my car, but at the same time, I don't charge them for me to clean their rooms etc.

Mine are a lot younger than yours (going into yr8 and going into secondary), but at the same time, there shouldn't be the 'everything for money' policy, whatever their ages.

CK

double_mummy

if her time can be better spent not tidying their rooms or all of the house by herself to make another little income for the family such as ebaying or crafting then i think that they should pay for that time

they are not children anymore if i want my bedroom tided i either have to do it myself or pay someone to do it juat as in the rest of my home my suggestion was to give them the same choice people who live on their own have (at a highly discounted rate)

at the other end i expect these people to remember the 18-20 years where parents did everything for them without payment because thats what parents do if the kids choose to ignore that and blame a struggling mum to charge them for things that are perfectly reasonable that is their own stupidity

cabbage

Hi

I would be tempted to work out my bills and then show them how much it would cost them to split it all three ways. The Money Advice Service has a useful budgeting tool.

Then I would look at how much it would cost them to move to their own accommodation and run a flat with the same facilities you are offering eg broadband, sky etc.

I would charge the one that's working more than the one at uni as you have to pay to do courses now.

Its easy for me to say this but harder to put it into action but you are preparing them for when they move on but this way its with a safety net of bank of Mum if things go wrong. Its better for them to learn the value of money now than get into debt later and lose their home

good luck

sukysue

What about if they pay you what you have lost in your revenue ie the ctc and cb you would be getting if they were still in school? That seems fair to me I know you prob don't want to make money out of them and if you managed comfortably on that income before well seems fair all round yes?

lushlifesaver

When I was working part time alongside study and living at home I paid one utility bill, £40 per week 'cover' and paid for 85% of the groceries (because I love to cook and bake) - I also did the washing and cleaned the kitchen/bathrooms.
On top of this I paid for my own contract phone, monthly travel pass, all educational costs (incl 10% of my post grad fees, books, etc) and anything else I wanted plus 1 meal a month out for my parents.

I'm lucky as I'm very much a night in rather than out person which gave me the luxury of spending money on good food and staples as well as homey pieces which are all now either in the home I share with bf, or waiting for us to get a bigger house!

I don't think it should be as cut and dry as 'one utility bill plus...' or just enough to cover what you are now short off. Sit down with them and discuss what amount you each feel is fair