Positive Changes and Life's Lessons

The_Hurricane

Hi All,

Just following on from another thread I started in relation to people not getting what they want from life etc. My question is, has anyone changed their life around for the better and what did you have to do?

Finally what were the key lessons learnt?

flutterby_lil

Hiya, good thread.

Well I changed my life in June 2007. I had been with a no good waste of space for 10 years, the last straw was when he was arrested for (secret) drug dealing. He wasn't good around the house, or in bed for that matter (LOL) or good to me. I put up with it for soooo long, was pregnant, got engaged (after he has stayed out all night and come home about 7am and asked me to marry him - had told his friends it was so I wouldn't have a go at him!), had bought a house and a car, so tried my best with him.

He had cheated on me numerous time, got a girl pregnant behind me back, the list goes on!

I met a lovely man, fell head over heals in love with him, (he was so different to loverat A), got pregnant very quickly, got engaged....then he became loverat 2 when he left me after having my scan and didn't want anything to do with me or our son!

I was happy being on my own and providing for my little man.
When my son was 8 months old, I met my current partner, he is just amazing. We have our own daughter who is 15 months and he recently adopted my son. Life is good, he works BL00DY hard, I am back at work after maternity leave, we have a good routine going and everybody is happy.

Suppose the moral of the story is, if your not happy, don't settle for second best. I wasted 10 years thinking I could change loverat A, but i never did. I was even working 8-4pm in one job and 5-9pm in another to save up for our wedding, he wouldn't let me use OUR car, I had to walk to both jobs!

My partner now is my perfect man, a happy ending for this kid

PinkLipgloss

Despite having a close (and huge!) family as well as friends in Scotland I wasn't happy living there. So I travelled.

I've lived in Australia for one year, Spain for 2 years, Mainland Japan for 5 years and have now permanently settled in the little island of Okinawa.

Key lessons include:

- it's amazing how much you can communicate without speaking a language (this applies to when I first moved to Japan - I've since learned to speak Japanese!)

- travel really does broaden the mind!

- there are, unfortunately, some people in life who seem resigned to sticking to their daily routines despite being completely unhappy with their lives. When challenged to make changes they react like you are insane. It's better (for all involved) to accept this and leave them to get on with it.

- don't concern yourself with what other people think of you (I was told I was "mad" for not wanting to stay in the UK). It's YOUR life, live it. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

- waking up across the road from a beautiful beach every day is awesome :cool:

- it is possible to get lots of home treats (e.g. Irn Bru) online

flutterby_lil

PinkLipgloss wrote: »

Despite having a close (and huge!) family as well as friends in Scotland I wasn't happy living there. So I travelled.

I've lived in Australia for one year, Spain for 2 years, Mainland Japan for 5 years and have now permanently settled in the little island of Okinawa.

Key lessons include:

- it's amazing how much you can communicate without speaking a language (this applies to when I first moved to Japan - I've since learned to speak Japanese!)

- travel really does broaden the mind!

- there are, unfortunately, some people in life who seem resigned to sticking to their daily routines despite being completely unhappy with their lives. When challenged to make changes they react like you are insane. It's better (for all involved) to accept this and leave them to get on with it.

- don't concern yourself with what other people think of you (I was told I was "mad" for not wanting to stay in the UK). It's YOUR life, live it. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

- waking up across the road from a beautiful beach every day is awesome :cool:

- it is possible to get lots of home treats (e.g. Irn Bru) online

Wow, good on you! Long may your happiness and beach gazing mornings last

pukkamum

I changed my life by letting go of the past, I accepted I could do nothing to change what had happened but I could certainly stop it affecting the rest of my life and that the biggest 2 fingers up to the people who had hurt me would be for me to make the rest of my life as happy as I could.
And I have, all I ever wanted was to be part of a happy loving family and rather than mourn the fact I didn't have it when young I have created my own, since letting go of the hurt I have lost 6 stone, I no longer get depressed and I dont sweat the small stuff.

flutterby_lil

pukkamum wrote: »

I changed my life by letting go of the past, I accepted I could do nothing to change what had happened but I could certainly stop it affecting the rest of my life and that the biggest 2 fingers up to the people who had hurt me would be for me to make the rest of my life as happy as I could.
And I have, all I ever wanted was to be part of a happy loving family and rather than mourn the fact I didn't have it when young I have created my own, since letting go of the hurt I have lost 6 stone, I no longer get depressed and I dont sweat the small stuff.

Fantastic nice to hear. Well done on the weight loss. I too lost 6 stone, and still have kept it off 8 years and 2 children later. Shows how being unhappy can affect weight. Mind you, now I am happy I just want to eat lol but it is under control

pukkamum

Wow flutterby are you me mine was 8 yrs and 2 kids ago, and although I only managed to be a size 10 for 2 mths, ( got pregnant the month I hit goal) I have stabilised at a size 14 and am very happy with that.
I still get urges to pig out and do but just can't physically eat as much as before.
Well done to you too, just being happy with what I see in the mirror is a massive boost everyday even after all these years.

flutterby_lil

pukkamum wrote: »

Wow flutterby are you me mine was 8 yrs and 2 kids ago, and although I only managed to be a size 10 for 2 mths, ( got pregnant the month I hit goal) I have stabilised at a size 14 and am very happy with that.
I still get urges to pig out and do but just can't physically eat as much as before.
Well done to you too, just being happy with what I see in the mirror is a massive boost everyday even after all these years.

I am a 12 and (relatively) happy, just wish some of my size 10s fit me

Well done on maintaining a happy and comfortable size for you. Did you do weight watchers by the way?

pukkamum

flutterby_lil wrote: »

I am a 12 and (relatively) happy, just wish some of my size 10s fit me

Well done on maintaining a happy and comfortable size for you. Did you do weight watchers by the way?

Yes I did, it was perfect for me I always believed that all I needed was to be told exactly what and what not to eat and I would lose weight and ww's did that.

YoungBusinessman

15/16(had it early) and breaking the law every weekend(to quite extremes) , drinking on the streets, leaving school the minute i could-was still 15 and 2 months shy of being 16 when i left, had a fight with a teacher before i left, generally hating everyone and everything until a death in the family(granda) and meeting my gf, i then took a weeks trial at a "random" pysical job just too keep me busy and stop thinking about my granda plus needing the money to go see new gf. Fast forward 6 years, qualified in my job for past 2 years, won 3 awards for it, me and OH have bought our own place, i drink reasonably now and try to accept my granda was my best friend and would be proud at least one good thing came of his death.

The_Hurricane

Some very inspiring stories here.