Positive Changes and Life's Lessons

marisco_2

The_Hurricane wrote: »

Hi All,

Just following on from another thread I started in relation to people not getting what they want from life etc. My question is, has anyone changed their life around for the better and what did you have to do?

Finally what were the key lessons learnt?

I changed my life around for the better seven years ago, by walking away from an abusive marriage. My very young children and I moved to a different part of the country. It took time to feel settled in the new area and to build a whole new happy, secure and fulfiling life for all of us. My sons are confident, happy little boys who are doing really well at school and have a lovely group of friends. They are living the childhood I had always planned and wanted for them. I have a job which I love and that gives me the quality of life I worked years for.

The key lessons I have learnt is that I have the strength and resilience, to face whatever life throws at me and to not be beaten by problems. Something I would not have believed about myself just a few years ago. Living happily and making the best of where you are at and what you have, is a sign that you will not let the past beat you

shays_mum

PinkLipgloss wrote: »

Despite having a close (and huge!) family as well as friends in Scotland I wasn't happy living there. So I travelled.

I've lived in Australia for one year, Spain for 2 years, Mainland Japan for 5 years and have now permanently settled in the little island of Okinawa.

Key lessons include:

- it's amazing how much you can communicate without speaking a language (this applies to when I first moved to Japan - I've since learned to speak Japanese!)

- travel really does broaden the mind!

- there are, unfortunately, some people in life who seem resigned to sticking to their daily routines despite being completely unhappy with their lives. When challenged to make changes they react like you are insane. It's better (for all involved) to accept this and leave them to get on with it.

- don't concern yourself with what other people think of you (I was told I was "mad" for not wanting to stay in the UK). It's YOUR life, live it. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

- waking up across the road from a beautiful beach every day is awesome :cool:

- it is possible to get lots of home treats (e.g. Irn Bru) online

Mate! that is sooooo cool, good on you can we come & stay?! lol!

shays_mum

((((((hugs to you all, some really inspiring stuff!!)))))))))) xx

johnwilliam_2

Me trying very hard to change my self from the depressions i have but i cannot change it. How hard i try to change but the same continues.I think i should undergo the pain thought my life .

shaz77_2

johnwilliam wrote: »

Me trying very hard to change my self from the depressions i have but i cannot change it. How hard i try to change but the same continues.I think i should undergo the pain thought my life .

Don't give up friend.

PinkLipgloss

shays_mum wrote: »

Mate! that is sooooo cool, good on you can we come & stay?! lol!

I'd love to have visitors to speak English to LOL!

I speak to my son a lot, but at 2 years old his responses are somewhat limited

This is across the road from my house....

kjp

Thank you for starting this thread and for everyone sharing their stories - I'm in the midst of a massive life change, my partner and I split up after 7.5 years three months ago, and I'm about to leave my job of 9 years, moving 100 miles away from my family to a place I know no one to take on a whole new challenge and three more years of exams! I can't wait but have wobbles every now and then, so it's so good to see positive stories.

And I am immensely jealous of that view!

The_Hurricane

kjp wrote: »

Thank you for starting this thread and for everyone sharing their stories - I'm in the midst of a massive life change, my partner and I split up after 7.5 years three months ago, and I'm about to leave my job of 9 years, moving 100 miles away from my family to a place I know no one to take on a whole new challenge and three more years of exams! I can't wait but have wobbles every now and then, so it's so good to see positive stories.

And I am immensely jealous of that view!

Well done you, only good things lye ahead.

Counting_Pennies_2

For me, I have been depressed for as long as I can remember.

Born to two depressed parents, it was my destiny to be depressed.

Everything happens to me, it always goes wrong, I mustn't get carried away if anything good happens because something will come along and shoot me down, so might as well keep myself grounded and then not get hurt.

I was conditioned that way, if my parents lived that way, there was not other alternative for me to base my life against.

I have lived that way for 30 odd years.

I have had the odd high, but generally slogged it out through school, getting a job, and getting through the lows relationships. Everything has been about getting through to the next obstacle.

I have had two children, and I have slogged my way through that too. Bad pregnancies, postnatal depression.

Now I have finally got to the stage that I don't have to live that way. I am fed up with battling through.

I have found another way to be happy. The realisation that being unhappy, being grounded as I believed to be the passage of life is not the way I want to live.

I am breaking through the best way I can. For the first time in my life I am starting to feel happy times. I can laugh out loud, dance to a song on the radio, sing to the point my voice vibrates around my kitchen. I am finding joy in my children, and getting to have the time with them that I love, as opposed to having to get through another day.

I have had years of counselling and that has kept my head above water, determined not to take tablets, as that is what my parents did and it would mean I wasn't them if I didn't take them.

My break through seems to be hypnotherapy, I am having counselling through hypnotherapy. All the unhappiness, the injustices in this world are brought to the front of my consciousness, spoken out loud, then filed. Never to have to dwell on them again. It is taking the load off my head. I used to physically sway due to the weight of my depression.

I have 30 years of weight to lift, but I am feeling lighter. I am no means there yet, but I feel lighter by the day.

My lessons are to take it slowly, not to expect too much of myself and look to enjoy my family and my life.

Tiddlywinks

This is a great book:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/S-U-M-O-shut-Up-Move-Brilliant/dp/0857081292/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1374271001&sr=1-1&keywords=sumo+shut+up+and+move+on

It's really light hearted and focusses on the fact that stuff happens, it's how you react to it that matters in the longer run.