child leaving college and csa

his_wife

caseworker, you can not enrol on another course AFTER the 19th birthday, in order to claim child benefit, she got kicked off course in march, so in theory, they should be a gap, in child benefit from june 4th to present date. however, since both yourselves and child benefit are not listening, the whole fiasco is open to fraudulent claims,,, no wonder the country is in the mess its in!!. Its not as if she left one course on friday and started another one on the monday, there is a gap of six solid months.

She is not on another course, nor is she working, as for supporting her self, she should do what normal 19 year olds do,, get a job!!! She has no intention of completing a college course, how do we know, she has applied three years running, been kicked of course three years running!!

Marisco

his_wife wrote: »

marisco, yes, we have, and from what i can gather nothing has happened, husband has just spent another fruitless half hour on the phone to csa, they are saying they checked with child benefit, on the fourth of june, we didnt report it till 24ish,,,,then he is saying the email we sent they havent received even though he admitted on the phone he had received it!!!!

I am really at a loss as what to do next,,,,,,,,does anyone have a csa telephone number for higher up the chain so to speak!!

What about taking her to court for receiving money by deception or theft? I know that sounds a bit far fetched, but it's absolutely disgraceful that you are still being forced to pay! Or get yourself on the JK show, he hates benefit fraudsters, I'm sure he'd get it sorted! (only joking ) And with the added bonus of making the CSA look like the incompetent outfit that they are! :mad:

his_wife

you know marisco , if i could laugh i would, me and my husband, are now at a loss, and logger heads over this, it has now taken over everything in our lives, and i am just so bewildered and lost, as too why something apparently so simple, has been made to be so bloody difficult !!

Marisco

his_wife wrote: »

you know marisco , if i could laugh i would, me and my husband, are now at a loss, and logger heads over this, it has now taken over everything in our lives, and i am just so bewildered and lost, as too why something apparently so simple, has been made to be so bloody difficult !!

Are you on good terms with oh's "child"? Would she write to the CB and CSA offices, explaining that she no longer qualifies for the CM and CB? I know straws are being grasped here mind, but if you're like me you'll do anything (legal) in desperation!

Or if your oh has a good relationship with his employer, get him to explain the situation (I know you probably don't want to air dirty laundry in "public", but needs must) then stop paying (but put it away "in case", and if not needed go on nice holiday) The CSA will apply for a DEO, and ask his employers to stall, so it takes weeks and weeks, and in the meantime, you might have thought of a better way to deal with it, or they might come to their senses.

I know you've probably thought of all these things yourself, I'm just thinking aloud here, I'm getting madder and madder on your behalf!!! It's a diabolical situation to find yourself in! :mad:

his_wife

thank u marisco,, his company is a massive organisation, they wont do anything "immoral" for the want of words.

Unfortunately the "child" is blinded by her mothers offers of money for nothing if u go along with me attitude. No we are not on good terms at this moment in time.

I have cried all morning with sheer frustration, i am honestly at a loss, and husband is totally deflated, he can see no way forward than other to pay it till she is 20, and pray and hope they dont raise it again, as the course she is apparently applying for, is an hours drive away, and a three year course!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

kevin137

his_wife wrote: »

thank u marisco,, his company is a massive organisation, they wont do anything "immoral" for the want of words.

Unfortunately the "child" is blinded by her mothers offers of money for nothing if u go along with me attitude. No we are not on good terms at this moment in time.

I have cried all morning with sheer frustration, i am honestly at a loss, and husband is totally deflated, he can see no way forward than other to pay it till she is 20, and pray and hope they dont raise it again, as the course she is apparently applying for, is an hours drive away, and a three year course!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It doesn't matter how long the course is, once the eligibility for CB ceases, that is the end of it full stop... Nothing more she could ever demand and the CSA could do nothing even if they wanted too... a child's 20th (what a joke, child indeed) is the end of it...!!! So let her sign up for ANOTHER 3 year course and waste her life...

The only person the PWC is hurting is the CHILD with this attitude, just think about what will happen in the future...

Try and explain to the child what will happen in the future should this continue...

A simple email or similar, to explain that no matter what happens, your liability will end on her 20th, and as the PWC's past behaviour has shown, she will NOT support her unless it is financially rewarding for her, then she will be out on the streets with nowhere to go...

Explain that one of 2 things can happen, she really is left homeless because of her attitude towards you and her Father, or you take her in and support her, and that with the current attitude, you would be quite right to let her stand on her own 2 feet, with no education, no money, and no home...!!!

Kids may only see it short term... But if my son had behaved like that, he would of been told, and he would of been cut of financially... As it is, he has a sensible head and wasn't like this, he finished his A-Levels recently, and will be at Uni for 3 years, will he be supported, yes, will he expect to be supported no... He has had a credit card on my account for 3 years, and all he has ever bought on it, is his flights to come see me, he works part time and buys his own clothes, but gets support in whatever way he wants. He doesn't need to ask for money, i trust him to have my card... Even to the point that when he went on holiday to Greece this summer with friends, and i asked how much spending money he had, €400 i told him, not to worry, and enjoy and do what he wanted and if he needed it to use the card for whatever he wanted... He came home having not spent the money he took, and didn't use my card at all...

Have you tried showing her the link to this thread or others similar so she can read for herself...??? A long shot maybe, but i would still talk to her... And explain this will be her future made with such a simple decision...

On a side note, if it was me that was employing, you can bet for sure, someone who has dropped out of college failed to finish etc, would be the last person i would employ...!!! I would rather take someone who applied straight from school and had no college education. Long gaps at that age show no willingness to be reliable or learn... And that is what she will already have to deal with, working while doing her education shows employability...

And we all know how many young people cannot find work even WITH an education...!!!

his_wife

thank you for taking your time to write this kevin, as you know by previous posts we have been here before, we have offered her money to help her get on in life, the answer we got was, i want the same amount you pay my mum or nothing at all!!!! At the time, we were paying not much less than £900 a month! So, as you , can see, unfortunately she has picked up a lot of her mums traits. I have showed her and told her before how much of an impact this situation has on everything, she either doesnt seem to grasp it, or she doesnt want too. I am not saying we will stop all financial imput, however, she needs to prove she can pay her own way, to some extent, life doesnt come on a plate does it!

As for employment she has never worked, she doesnt need too, her words not mine. Sad but true

13Kent

kevin137 wrote: »

It doesn't matter how long the course is, once the eligibility for CB ceases, that is the end of it full stop... Nothing more she could ever demand and the CSA could do nothing even if they wanted too... a child's 20th (what a joke, child indeed) is the end of it...!!! So let her sign up for ANOTHER 3 year course and waste her life...

Unfortunately in our case the PWC applied for an extention to the CB as the 'child' was between college and trying to get an apprenticeship and the PWC was not of course in a rush to enourage the child to get any sort of job once the CB extention had been allowed.

13Kent

Unfortunately the more you battle over things the more you risk alienating the NRP's children, and putting them in a difficult position as the PWC obviously told them to lie to us about the circmstances of what the eldest child was doing and where that child was living. We got to the point where we had to make a decision about whether to pursue things and risk alienating the children or let things lie and bite the bullet and continue to pay knowing that the end is inevitably in sight as the child gets older.

his_wife

your right 13kent, i thought someone was going to come back with i sound bitter etc,,, at this moment in time i feel bitter,,, i have never played the system, i dont expect others too, but , i am too naive for my own good.

I beleive her mum has told her too lie,,,however, at 19 year old, i would of expected a little bit more if you know what i mean, she has a good relationship with her dad, normally,,, so i would of thought she would of been more honest with him.

It is now, no longer about the money, but, the principal of this giant loop hole. We have it in our heads that we will pay till she is 20,,,,then more fun will begin i suppose, as she will still be in college, and still wanting money for nothing,,,,in that i mean, she will want it because she wants it, rather than go and work part time to subsidise her own night out