The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

VJsmum

kidcat wrote: »

As for a cleaner - I would love a cleaner but have some concerns, having never employed a household help at all I am bemused where to begin looking. Would I have to be in when they came or could I leave them to it? What sort of cost would I be looking at? And how many hours do I ask for? what can I expect them realistically to cover per hour?

I know I need to do this and am resigned to it now, however I do feel like people will judge me for hiring a cleaner when I dont work but I dont see what else can be done.

Hi, I haven't been contributing to this thread of late as, to be honest, I don't really have it tough, and it felt hypocritical to merely sympathise along - though of course I do sympathise with everyone having a tough time of it.

However, I can help here. I increased my work hours at the beginning of September and our hectic life style meant no cleaning was going to happen. So I now employ a cleaner for 4 hours a fortnight and she can get through the whole house in that time. In between weeks I just whip round loos and basins and give the kitchen a wipe over - takes an hour.

I got mine from an agency who were advertising in a freebie newspaper. The guy came round and we had a chat, he vets all cleaners by interviewing in their own houses, he takes references etc. I pay him £2.50 an hour management fee (monthly by DD) and her £7.50. This is quite cheap for an agency And I was expecting to pay £12 -£15 an hour. At the moment I am there when she comes, I just take marking etc to another room, but soon I will be working on the day she comes, but I know her now and trust her there alone.

Hope that helps - it sounds like you need this so I should feel more guilty than you, I don't do anything like the work you do

mardatha

Kidcat don't judge your hubby too harshly pet - he knows what he can do, and what he just can't ... don't see him as the enemy because it is after all, you & him against the world! You need to unite and work together for your wee family yes, but if he just really cannot cope at home then that's it - and a wage is always good. You're in danger of painting yourself into a corner and making yourself indispensible, the only way out of that is exhaustion and collapse. I'm not in any way being horrible here pet, I'm just a plain speaker and worry at your stress levels ok? xxx

kidcat

mardatha wrote: »

Kidcat don't judge your hubby too harshly pet - he knows what he can do, and what he just can't ... don't see him as the enemy because it is after all, you & him against the world! You need to unite and work together for your wee family yes, but if he just really cannot cope at home then that's it - and a wage is always good. You're in danger of painting yourself into a corner and making yourself indispensible, the only way out of that is exhaustion and collapse. I'm not in any way being horrible here pet, I'm just a plain speaker and worry at your stress levels ok? xxx

Vjsmum thank you I will look into agencies tomorrow.

Mrs lw thank you

Mar you are right and I am getting myself around it this weekend hencr looking at the other options. Cleaner being just the first, I am contemplating after school club for dd twice a week as well to take pressure off.
It feels very un OS to hire in help but if I can't source it in house I now see I must look outside and if needs be pay.

grandma247

Kidcat your health is telling you that you cannot do it all. As you have found, sooner or later your health breaks down if you try. You are just one human being with all its frailties (is that a word?)

A cleaner will make such a difference to you all. Even having a few hours once a fortnight would make things so much less stressful.

Just like bullies those who would judge you will just find something else to pick you up on so ignore them, they don't live your life.

nuttyp

Hi all, Just trying to play the catch up game. OH is asleep on the sofa and DD is in bed asleep. We nipped to see other DD and she is feeling like she has a cold coming. Youngest DD is on the mend now, fingers crossed. She ate some chocolate, and is on 'facebook' to her friends. She did a webcam link, so they could see her 'wounded; face!!

We have roasty dinner today, nice and homely. Just some frozen potatoes and peas with a yorky pud and a small piece of pork.

I wold love to have a cleaner in, some days it feels like all I do. I pop round my friends and end up helping her. Seems her eldest DD has no idea how to hoover let alone put the washing machine on.

Was nice to read that fuddle has arrived safely, kezlou sickly kids - blurgh - had one of those all week.

Well must crack on with sorting lunch, take care x

Byatt

Kidcat, in my job I work for a lot of people who have cleaners, and most do not work, in the sense of going out of the home to work...they are all ages, have busy lives even though they are at home a lot of the time. I can see however, what a huge difference it makes, even though it's usually just once a week. My DD has a cleaner too, because she just doesn't "do" cleaning.

There are agencies and you can also change your mind if you don't get on with a cleaner. Most of my clients have agencies or someone that has been recommended. They spend their time either doing a deep clean or a whiz through dealing with the daily grot.

They all have a key as I do for my work, and times and dates set.

Think of it as giving someone a job! I know I will consider it (do consider it), because my depression means I have times of not doing a great deal. Don't feel resigned to it, embrace it! :T

VJsmum, hi , my DD pays similar.

PS, and don't go round cleaning beforehand, from what I see, things are left week to week, even crumbs on the floor.

Byatt

mcculloch29 wrote: »

I had 7 different addresses in the first 15 months of being a Forces wife, 76/77, know the feeling!
Back then the Army supplied all furniture and furnishings so we had a lot less to move, luckily.

Kidcat. What Pooky said. Would you consider a cleaner for a few hours a week? Makes a world of difference.

Byatt, I second Napisan or ACE laundry bleach for zapping mould. TG we don't have that problem, but I've been there in other houses. It can be so hard to ventilate and dehumidify in winter.

OMG, did you have those nylon, psychedelic sofa/chair covers?:eek: Our cat scratched them to bits, just by climbing on them. This was in 76/77.

gailey_2

Afternoon guys.

having frustrating day want to get number of things done but my 3kids are hindering me.

This morning small boy broke the bag of reindier food all over bathroom and girls room so all ell broke loose as only brought it at xmas fair yesterday.

I have tackled cupboard of doom under the stairs but living room still needs a lot of work .I stopped for lunch then ran out of energy.

I did find some useful lost stuff in cupboard gloves, clothes god knows where lost book bags gone too.will have to admit defeat and buy a new one.

Bagged up loads of small boys old clothes to give to so someone I know with baby boy.

found some funky boots used to be eldest sadly they dont fit small girl.
ahh now small boys just weed on small girls rainbow trousers! cue another row.

the bathroom and all the bedrooms still look a state guess rome wasent built in a day.

yesterday we atteneded nursery xmas fair which thankfully free entry and cheap prices compared to primary school fair.

They saw santa in tent grotto, played games, dident win raffle but won some moisturiser and some tuna in tombola,girls had nail and face painted and they all had cake and did xmas crafts. We did buy some reindier food actually marthdartha did wonder if possible idea maybe some sort edible versions with biscuit crumbs and edible cake glitter?
also on pinterest was reindier cones filled with hot choc and topped with mini marshmallows.

We decided to see santa in wales this year. so need to book that.
Also was hoping to meet mate in cardiff and mate in bath xmas markets but such hectic few weeks ahead.

Made mistake looking pintrest earlier now ave loads of ideas but very little time.

princess been thinking about my most commonly worn items and mine are

1black leggings
2)dark blue wide leg jeans
3)black skinny jeans
4)navy chinos
5)beige cords =more formal ocasions or night how with dressy top, heels and small clucth bag.
6)black trousers

find those tend to do me everyday combined with

tunic length top that can eb worn with the leggings, jeans or with tights , knee high boot and chunky cardigan-doubles as a dress I also wear leggings under skirts /dresses instead of tights.

oversized chunky jumper can be worn with all my bottoms.

jackets like one outdoor coat.
love blazers as instantly smarten up jeans.

I have silly amount of scarfs.light scarfs, outdoor scarfs pashinas.
have couple sparkly ones .stripy, spotty.want a tarten one next.

winter shoes

heels for party/going out
boots like knee high got 2nd hand
wellies.
trainers or daps.
like my ballet pumps but not so great in winter.

yesterday wore stripy long length navy and white top cost me£1 off local fb group, navy chinos a rare new purchase £20 next. a denim sleeve less shirt wore over summer £1 local fb group wore as waist coat. I wore my knee high beige leather boots £3 from fb selling group.Old sheepskin coat so old cant remember where its from but its worn. thick stripy navy and white scarf boden keep sending me vouchers for 15%off p[lus 10quid of so paid something daft like £3 for it.

Mam rang shes got the aldi bargains for kids

cord skirt £4.99 and gillet £4.99 so girls match.
pink quilted coat small girl £7.99
nice kids socks £2.49 for 5. They had nice novelty slipper socks same price which I intend to get for their stocking.
thermal underwear sets £3.99.

shes now awaiting the toys deals on the 28th as there was pirate ship and little tikes torch she got eldest the £4.99 watch she wanted.

im getting the choc reindiers from aldis and their advent calenders were £1.

hope t do aldi food shop week afrer next as mostly frozen and grocery items we want so want to beat the hellish rush.

Tommorow im helping out again breastfeeding group thats enough for me. Dont know how you do it kidcat done pta and preschool commitee whcih was like governers never again. maybe if all 3get into same school then might join pta then. I have few schools to visit annoying as only want one but need a 2nd /3rd choice.

rather random I know but think its fab is rac routefiner has cars and pedestrian routes . seems to gove 2routes in mins and miles doesnt say how fast walker you would need to be but handy if going to a new place.

I have these dreams of getting house amazing for xmas but not sure possible going to have to go slightlys maller tree this year as running out space in the living rooms.

Anyone know if poundshops sell brown parcel paper?

decided to save myself some money on wrapping this year and go for classy brown and red rubbon with pine cones, cheap baubles and candy canes to decorate the presents instead.

we have b&m, poundworld, poundland, and 99p stores nearby and poundstretcher.

I also have to venture city centre do primark which can be hellish.

hoping younger 2kids be quite cheap

eldest wants new scooter.
might get youngest a toy cooker as hes so domesticated.
middle one wants lego, anything girley and few accesories for her scooter picked up free helmut for her the other day.

hope everyones ok and wrapping up warm.

made leek and potato soup last night and oven cooked jackets.
still doing well on the food but every ones bit bored of fish.
eldests is addicted to soups so need to stock up on them.
plus basic popcorn and some new hot choc as so many movies on right now to keep them amused.

fuddle

kidcat if by hiring a cleaner you gained a few hours a week to get some time to breathe, the money is there to pay for it and you're ok with the idea then who gives a hoot huh? It's not like you'll be going kidcat pampering with your free time is it. Definitely not, you'll be doing everything you already do but instead of using your teeny bit of free time to clean, you'll be able to recuperate in that time instead. That's the idea although I suspect you'll not spend the time on you but find something else to do... But that doesn't matter, it'll give you chances and choices

Loads of things to do, won't bore you. Slow cooker unpacked but made a huge organisational blunder. All the food is in trip 3 (1 was last weekend and is in DH's new depot to be picked up tomorrow, 2 was yesterday and 3 is today. Poor DH) so at least I should have it by 5.30 this evening.

A houseful of stuff in 3 midi van loads - who needs a lorry my sister paid £700 to have her stuff moved 5 miles. Other than the storage unit and physically and mentally draining it's cost us nothing but £70 storage unit costs while we stayed with MIL. Should add the fuel has been ok'd by DH's boss - their version of a relocation package. Saved us a fortune though.

Right I'm waffling. It's dark. I'm on a prepayment meter and watching the £'s drop away... no lights on. Prepayment meter meet tight wife. oh dear

nuttyp

fuddle have you checked there is no debt on the meter, I think if you keep pressing the grey button next to where the key goes it will list any debts. I wold also read the meters asap, then you can be sure your not paying anyone elses debts iygwim.

Gailey poundland sell brown paper and xmas paper really cheaply.

vjsmum nice to see you again.

THURSDAY IS THE MIRROR - £5 COUPON DAY. FOR ALDI.

MARK IT IN YOUR DIARY!!!!!!!

I have to attend a meeting in Leicester, so will stop onroute to get my 2 copies.

take care x