The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

Softstuff

monnagran wrote: »

Softstuff: Re: suet. I never use suet in my mincemeat, (but I do use a satisfying amount of brandy,)

x

Scotch in mine Monnagran. Not so much a satisfying amount as an intoxicating one!

Fuddle, I think she blamed the landlord! For that and other things besides. They're pretty impartial that way. As for spiced coffee syrups, you can most certainly make them. There's a heap of them online, I've only made caramel syrup previously, it went really well.

Kidcat, I'm not sure what PDA is (google wasn't helpful), but sending hugs nonetheless for the shock.

Spikyhedghog, my friends husband has promised her a small folding stepladder for Christmas! She hit another problem in a different property, she wasn't able to look in a high cupboard at all :rotfl:

Nursemaggie, I hope you have some success soon, my fingers and other bits are crossed for you both.

Went for a meal out and a movie last night, with hubby and aforementioned friend. Went to pay, card was declined. Tried again, card declined again. Tried to call bank, couldn't get through, tried to log in on smartphone, no joy. Eventually friend had to pay, I was a bit mortified (and indignant with bank). Turns out after, that a transfer I'd made from one account to the other earlier that day (I budget myself by having multiple online accounts), well... it hadn't gone through. Because I hadn't pressed confirm. Ahem .

kidcat

Oooh soft stuff that's always very embarrassing. Pda is pathological demand avoidance, it explains his inability to deal with instructions or commands, and means he will always need to feel in total control. Having read up more I agree it is him and explains why certain techniques for auties don't work with him.

I am just getting ready to leave for the new car, feeling a little excited but also worried about having to take on debt to pay for some of it. Am accepting it is necessary but frightened of something going wrong.

Hope everyone has a lovely day

Possession

Nursemaggie I feel for you so badly that this is happening to you. I can't offer any advice about the benefits situation, and hopefully you'll be able to see CAB this week, but for the postcodes just put the number and street name into google, no need to visit postcode finder. It will bring up the address. Nothing is secret anymore!
I've been doing freelance work over the weekend and while it took me too long, I'm sure I'll get more used to it and able to do it quicker.
We finally received our mortgage promise yesterday, after re-requesting it when we had no post for 3 days which is unheard of. I phoned the local sorting office to be told that they had lots of staff sickness and 17 vacancies but all the post had gone out. Lo and behold, 20 minutes later, a knock on the door and a pile of post, with about 6 elastic bands around it. Something fishy eh? Sadly the mortgage document was not there so I dread to think what else has gone missing I didn't know about.
I need to make banana cake today, someone remind me later! I discovered, since you can see online, that DS hasn't been eating anything for school dinner. Occasionally he would have a slice of pizza for morning snack, and sometimes a bread roll for lunch, but often nothing. This has been going on for weeks. Obviously it's a bit worrying, and when asked why DS says he doesn't like the food, which seems odd since he has been eating it for more than a year but as he insists nothing else is going on I have to accept it. So he is now taking packed lunch and he likes a piece of banana cake in there (frozen, instead of an ice pack, it defrosts lunchtime). There have still been a couple of days he hasn't eaten it, unless those were the days he wasn't bright enough to throw it away I suppose, but mostly he has eaten it. He does eat at home, and he does 5 hours of karate training a week, so he needs to eat! I'm just keeping an eye on it for now, and emphasising no sweets if meals not eaten.

Softstuff

kidcat wrote: »

Oooh soft stuff that's always very embarrassing. Pda is pathological demand avoidance, it explains his inability to deal with instructions or commands, and means he will always need to feel in total control. Having read up more I agree it is him and explains why certain techniques for auties don't work with him.

Sometimes embarrassment is my middle name. Along with nutter.

Thanks for the explanation. I guess it could be useful on the one hand to know, for the sake of understanding and dealing, but hard to take. So sending more hugs.

fuddle

savingqueen wrote: »

Talking of Christmas, how was your day fuddle?

Very busy but full of enjoyable activities. Pinecones sprayed gold/ glitter glued edged. Leek and bacon puff eaten. Cracker 'bangs' bought. Santa Claus watched arriving on a horse drawn carriage. Christmas Lights switched on observed. Coffee syrup made (although just vanilla as that essence was the cheapest while I was trying it out... success!) Pork dinner made and eaten. Illuminated walk at National Trust place enjoyed. I finished the day watching TV with a cider and wrapped some gifts.

I still awoke immediately stressed for no reason but I am pleased I filled the day yesterday. I needed distracting and I needed busying, doing things I enjoyed. Some new memories written to boot.

Today is a chilled out day in comparison. It's cold but sunny so we're going for a welly walk to the beach and marina in Weymouth.

I will take my slipper sock to crochet in the car

mrsdwhite

Morning :j
Kezlou - Hope you're feeling a bit better now. Not good going round collapsing!

Nursemaggie - I do hope you get your situation sorted soon, its horrible having this sort of thing hanging over your head.

Kidcat - Glad the school are helping, are they offering help with the pda?

I've had a rough few days over here. Work is still hard going, someone called in sick friday night and again last night. I'm sure she is actually ill, but that does now make 3 weekends in a row that she's let us down with one thing or another and we can't run a business on sympathy! It means I end up leaving DD in bed and going down to help as I feel bad for DH working 16 hour days with absolutely no break and not enough staff. To top that off on friday night I had a face full of abuse because I very politely asked someone to finish their drink and make their way out as the pub was closed. :mad:
Had myself a treat of a new hair style yesterday, which was very nice and relaxing. Just what I needed, I came out feeling much better about the world. Amazing what a little bit of you time can do! :T
But karma punished me for that by having me find a nice pink puddle of engine coolant under my car in the car park when I got back to it. Queue 1.5 hour wait for the AA and a further hour while he found the leak and bodged a fix to get the car drivable again for me. Poor DD6 had a few teary moments in the car while we were waiting (as did I). I turned into one of 'those' people on the book of face moaning about life
DD6 is having a playdate at her friends house for the afternoon so I'm helping at work for a few hours to take some pressure off the rest of the team. She's doing something with Rainbows next sunday, I had planned to keep the afternoon off work and do some of my Christmas stuff that needs doing, fingers crossed the plan stays that way!
DH thanked me for the help at work this morning, I simply replied with the way he could help is by finding another damn job so that none of this has to be my problem anymore! :eek:

savingqueen

Morning all

Hang in there nursemaggie - things will work out in the longer term. Sending positive thoughts and big hugs. Crossing everything you get to speak to CAB tomorrow and get NPow to sort out their act. Can you access a foodbank in the meantime to help whilst everything is being sorted out?

Thanks for clarifying PDA kidcat. I know its more for you both to deal with but positive in one way in that more knowledge is more power to help DS IFYKWIM?

Thank goodness the mortgage letter finally arrived Possession. Seems like packed lunch is the way to go with DS - will it work out cheaper too?

What a lovely day fuddle! Thanks for sharing it.


Had a bit of a lie in and could feel indigestion coming on (rare I get it but very very bad when I do). Probably due to all the pizza, fudge cake etc yesterday and the running around of late. So I sat on sofa and finished my book. Now its worn off and no bad attack, I can crack on with the housework - everywhere looks a mess.

laters folks, be kind to yourselves
SQ X

camelot1001

Good morning everyone, it's a lovely sunny day here with clear blue skies, different to yesterday when it didn't seem to get light at all.

fuddle - So good that you had a fun and busy day yesterday, hopefully it took your mind off the situation with your Mum and sis. I can't offer any advice but am sending loads of support.
nursemaggie - What a terrible mess, I hope you get an appt tomorrow and get this sorted out.
Possession - Does DS eat breakfast? That's a long day to go without anything to eat.
mrsdwhite - I hope the staffing issues get sorted out soon, always good to have a trip to the hairdressers!
savingqueen - The party sounds a bit exhausting!

DD and I were looking after a little dog last week, my work colleague died and whilst the funeral, etc, was going on we were asked to look after him. I was away at a residential outdoor centre for a few days but DD was off, I was back on Friday and the little fella went home yesterday. I really miss him, he is a (rather large) westie with loads of attitude! When I took him back home, colleague's husband gave me an envelope with £100 of restaurant vouchers in! I will drop in a thank you card tomorrow, can't believe it - didn't want anything, we enjoyed having the little chap and were happy to help.

I am going to paint my bedroom ceiling in a minute, been doing all the prep work this morning - once I start I will be ok, it's just the initial starting painting that's the issue.

Hope you all have a good Sunday.

Possession

Mrsdwhite that sounds tough, definitely no fun working those hours.
SQ yes packed lunch should work out cheaper, but the reason he wasn't taking it before is that his bag is so heavy and they don't have lockers they have to carry them round all day.
Camelot, he'd rather not eat breakfast he has to be made to. He won't eat more than a banana, a yoghurt or a piece of bread. He would eat cheese or a sausage roll, but I'd rather he didn't for breakfast. He has never liked cereal and he detests stuff like porridge. Never wants toast either. Any ideas? Mustn't be expensive, LOL! The one thing I can think of that he'd definitely eat is a scone, but not sure how healthy it would be to eat a scone every day. No worse than all those sugary cereals I expect.
Today we must get the Christmas decorations down from the loft, because the advent calendars are in there somewhere. Not looking forward to having even more stuff and boxes about, I must be turning into a grinch.
Camelot I bet you took a huge weight off your colleague's husband's mind having the little chap taken care of.

stiltwalker

Possession - would he do bread and cheese and a slice of ham/couple of slices of salami instead of the sausage roll and call it a continental breakfast?


Kidcat - good luck with the PDA thing, hope you can find some good support and techniques. I know it's a fairly new thing and not always accepted by the medical so called professionals but it fits a few JS kids (auty tendencies and traits are an accepted part of the syndrome, but parents often feel that PDA may be a better fit) I'm beginning to think that our two may fall somewhere into the PDA camp - although it's really too early to tell with DS, direct instructions and DD are really not a good combination! We often have to come at things sideways and make her think they are her idea!


Had a fab day yesterday with the charity Go Kids Go at a wheelchair training workshop - DD had a great time and me and DH got to have a go in chairs too as they bring loads of extras for sibs and parents. I spent most of the day in one and boy are my shoulders telling me about it today - well I was rather throwing it round, learning to do kerbs and slopes, playing bulldog, tag and then wheelchair basketball to round the day off. Great fun of course but also a big insight into what we ask DD to do day in, day out - no wonder she is always so ready for her bed!


Ok must scoot down to Mr T for bread for lunch - hugs all round and catch you all laters - Hx