Age gap between children?

samtoby

I think any age gap poses its own issues.

chunkychocky

There's almost 19 years age gap between my older brother and my younger brother and I'm exactly in the middle age-wise. My older brother moved out before my younger brother was born so they have nothing in common. I was an annoying little brat to my older brother who as a young teenager didn't want his friends coming round as his annoying 4 year old sister would ruin his street cred. I always wanted him to play kiddie games but he wasn't interested. When my younger brother was born I enjoyed being like a second mum to him, but again by the time I was a teenager I became quite resentful of all of the unpaid babysitting I was expected to do. The 3 of us haven't really got anything in common even now, and to all intents and purposes I feel more like I was an only child.

This is why I chose to have just under two years between my two boys. They are best friends and do everything together. Completely different personalities but this seems to work very well. Having them close together was the best decision I ever made.

Maysie

I have a 16 yr old, nearly 10 year old and a 1 year old. Works out quite well i get a little help if i need it and they love baby to bits.

I have two half brothers one is 21 years younger than me and i think the other is 23 years younger. I barely know one and don't know the other at all i don't feel connected to them at all.

anderson8

There's 18 months between me and my elder sister and 4 years between me and my elder brother. My sister and I are thick as thieves, even though she lives down south now and were growing up.
I don't really and didn't have that much in common with my brother.
There will be 2 years between ds and my baby due next month and it prob will be tough in the beginning but I'd love them to have a relationship like my sister and I.

notanewuser

anderson8 wrote: »

There's 18 months between me and my elder sister and 4 years between me and my elder brother. My sister and I are thick as thieves, even though she lives down south now and were growing up.
I don't really and didn't have that much in common with my brother.
There will be 2 years between ds and my baby due next month and it prob will be tough in the beginning but I'd love them to have a relationship like my sister and I.

And if they don't?

busiscoming2

There is almost three years between my two eldest and almost seven years between middle and youngest.

It was probably easier as the older two were established at school and for the first three years the middle one and youngest would play together sometimes. As the older two got to secondary age/teen it changed and they youngest complained a lot he wanted a younger sibling.

The older two both went to Uni and haven't lived at home since. The youngest has for the most part grown up being an only child and probably treated more like an older child/adult for most of his life and because of this or by just being the youngest he has had the most freedom.

With hindsight, more money and with a bit more youth on my side, I would have had a fourth.

notanewuser

busiscoming2 wrote: »

There is almost three years between my two eldest and almost seven years between middle and youngest.

It was probably easier as the older two were established at school and for the first three years the middle one and youngest would play together sometimes. As the older two got to secondary age/teen it changed and they youngest complained a lot he wanted a younger sibling.

The older two both went to Uni and haven't lived at home since. The youngest has for the most part grown up being an only child and probably treated more like an older child/adult for most of his life and because of this or by just being the youngest he has had the most freedom.

With hindsight, more money and with a bit more youth on my side, I would have had a fourth.

I've heard others say you should have 1, 2 or 4 because 3 almost always causes issues.

loracan1

samtoby wrote: »

I think any age gap poses its own issues.

And has its own advantages - my brother and sister have a 2 year gap. They've never been close. I arrived some years later and though 8+ years younger, got on better with the pair than they did with each other.

anderson8

notanewuser wrote: »

And if they don't?

If they don't its no big deal. But it won't make me want any more!

pukkamum

Theres oros and cons to both.
I have an age gap of around 4 yrs between each of the 3 of them meaning almost 10yrs from youngest to oldest.
Therefore the youngest was at school before I had the next, my mum did it the same way with 3 girls and my sister has done the same with her 2.
I think this is because for us sisters it worked out well, me as the middle child got 2 playmates the younger for rough and tumble playing babies and barbies, and the eldest was on hand for more grown up things.
My youngest sister was mollycoddled by us both and is equally close to us both.
I found this the best way for me because each child got their time at home just me and them for 4 years and the elder children got a break from baby.
This is especially nice when baby is first born plenty of peace and quiet in the day for feeding and napping.