Paperwork everywhere at parents' house

Any

stebiz wrote: »

It really depends on how she approached it. If she offered to help organise her Mum/Dad's bills they may well actually appreciate it.

Given the OP here, that s/he "feels concerned", I can just imagine... sounds so condescending when talking about 2 adults who are aparently capable enough to live alone and look after children!

floss2

Mattygroves2 wrote: »

...Maybe you could aim for your mum and / or dad doing you a simple list of bank accounts etc and a note where there wills are kept ? The problem is that it's a bit weird and morbid talking to your parents about what would happen if they die.

TBH I think it is quite a sensible suggestion, particularly if they have a different way of dealing & managing their paperwork to you.

I know that my in-laws have shared such information with one of their 3 sons for future use when necessary, and I know from experience that my mum sorted all her paperwork out after my dad died, as she wanted to make it easier for us when she died and actually gave all 4 of her cildren a copy of the will so we all knew who would get what.

Mojisola

Any wrote: »

Given the OP here, that s/he "feels concerned", I can just imagine... sounds so condescending when talking about 2 adults who are aparently capable enough to live alone and look after children!

It all depends on how that particular family works - some people would be very offended at such an offer; others would be grateful.

People can be really good at some things but struggle to stay on top of other areas of life - offering help with one thing doesn't mean you think they are incapable in all areas.

Alikay

I don't think it's your place at all to have a word with your parents about their personal admin, although I do sympathise with you as my mum is exactly the same!

All my life (I'm now in my 50's) my parents had a chaotic approach to money, and as a child I remember frequent irate phone calls to the gas and electricity boards about overdue bills, and late night drives into town where envelopes of cash would be stuffed through the bank's letterbox as mortgage payments were due out the next morning and the account was empty. They were never short of money, just utterly disorganised and not bothered about wasting it.

I think it's made me more organised with admin etc as I can't be fussed with all that drama over something as straightforward as domestic finance. My mum is now in her 70's and despite large pensions and twice downsizing her home since my dad died she is exactly the same. I've offered help, but it's been firmly declined, which is fine. When she dies or becomes unable to deal with things, I'm sure I'll be able to cope, as will you, OP.

Dunroamin

fluffymuffy wrote: »

Maybe you missed the posts with different views form your own?

At the time when I posted, there weren't 't any.

fluffymuffy

Dunroamin wrote: »

At the time when I posted, there weren't 't any.

But you posted after me.

I guess I don't count.

shegirl

Why would you interfere?They can do what they want in their home.Leave them to it!

Dunroamin

fluffymuffy wrote: »

But you posted after me.

I guess I don't count.

Apologies, I confused you with another poster.

Abbafan1972

Dunroamin wrote: »

Everybody's suggested that you don't - why post for advice and then ignore what people say?

Not everybody has said that and I just wanted your views on the subject.

Spendless

Yesterday in one of her drawers,I found an older than 6 months cheque for over £100 that my Grandmother hadn't cashed in. She hadn't realised it was a cheque (I didn't initially and I'm still not clear why she has it). I found it cos I was looking for the electric/gas bill she reckons to have posted. Since she can barely walk I don't really believe her story of how she went to the post box herself. I would tactfully bring up the subject in a round about sort of way, so as not to cause offence if the offer is refused.