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Shopping Pet Hates
Comments
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. Be patronised - I speak mandarin, try being told you're stupid for working in a supermarket middled aged and then surprising the customer!
I would love to do this if I worked in a supermarket and knew Mandarin! Having grumpy guts talking down to you like you're under his shoe, then just shouting at him in Mandarin :rotfl::rotfl:0 -
I just thought of one... people in front who don't put the 'shopping divider' down for you!! I know it's a bit sad, but I see it as really rude as I always do it for the person behind me, I just think it's polite!!0
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I think I have been to this Tesco!!
I always assumed the disabled spaces are where they are so users don't have to cross the road. A small kerb can be a big deal in a wheelchair. And the taxis are all over the place.
If it is the same Tesco I saw Gaynor Faye shopping there once
But there's a big kerb in the ones along the side, with just occasional dips. Totally agree about the taxis though.
I've never seen anyone famous there though! But I tend to wander round pretty obliviously, trying to remember what's on the shopping list that I've left at home.Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.0 -
• The drivers parking who go at 0.3 mph hoping for a space to appear just in front of them.
• Those that park so badly they take up 2 spaces.
• Those that park so close to someone else, their door will never open.
• Raceday drivers doing 30..... screech of brakes, parp, then vroooom.
• Disabled parking filled with likely lads in their 20's
• Trolleys left with rubbish in them - receipts, sweet packets, leaflets.
• Trolleys whose wonky wheels mean they won't go straight.
• Trolleys that are jammed together in the rack, when there are no others left.
• Automatic doors that are so slow you have to grind to a halt whilst they grumble open.
• Doors that are left open in winter, with heat billowing out.
• People coming out of the shop without looking - reading their receipt or talking on the phone
• People that grind to a halt as soon as they're through the door - in or out, they'll just stop!
• Loud music instore.
• Loud unintelligable announcements instore : BING BONG "Would Tracey from clothing plah gar to margal fant gar matbank frangle. Customer waiting": BING BONG
• The fruit & veg section, where there's clearly a mouldy banana or potato stinking it all up.
• People who just grab the first bit of fruit/veg without looking at it... but at least that mouldy potato/banana smell is now moving on.
• People who smell bad. I mean those not carrying away that mouldy banana/potato, but who obviously haven't washed.
• People who smell "nice"... or think they do, covered in a chokingly disgusting quantity of "deodorant"
• Abandoned trolleys left right across an aisle.
• Abandoned fresh or frozen food, left in the clothing aisle, 'cos they've decided not to buy it.
• The person who gets "the last one" just before you.... That triumphant smile they then give you.
• Screaming babies - the REALLY LOUD ones
• Children sneezing over the produce.
• Gossiping groups and their trolleys that block an aisle.
• Those "bargain" announcements you can't hear..."half price doughnuts, beer, ipads and chocolate in aisle splurgle. That's aisle gurgle for all you ever wanted, half price, last few left".
• BING BONG ten seconds later, because she forgot just now.
• The bloke who hasn't got a clue, on the phone to get help. "They haven't got any Stilton; would Wotsits be OK insteead? Oh, yah, yah, yah.... yah, ... yah, so... that's no, OK, yah."
• Ingredients/instructions that are written in the smallest font.
• Old sliced meat on the deli counter..please from the left heap, please from the left heap... arrgh no, from the grotty right.
• Metric/imperial confusion: "half a kilo of cheddar, please..." "That's four ounces.." as she wraps it up and passes it over.
• "Queue busters to the tills." Oh, God, I've nearly finished, and it's mayhem up at those tills.
• Which queue? Which Queue? that one... oh no, it's got a "Trainee" badge on.. swap to that longer one...
• "You don't mind if I just go to the front - I've only got these". I like to offer, not to see you forge past us all!
• Lady with a small basket in front... who then waves her husband into the queue... with his articulated trolley piled higher than he can see.
• The "divider" wars. I place the 'Next Customer' label down, next customer has to rearrange it and shove my crisps. Scrunch.
• "Them infront's" shopping. Healthy food, salads, fruit juices, quality wine, unpronounceable Italian stuff... delicious...
• "Them behind's" shopping... pizza & chips, chocolate, buns, pizza, sweets, chips, pizza, pizza and chocolate.
• Yet he's tall and handsome, she's willowy and perfect... HOW? HOW??!!
• Dilemma: lie bottles down (and leak?), stand them up (and they fall over?).
• "You mean I have to pay" lady who has to search for her purse.
• Coupon man at the front. tear... tear, trim, trim, tear.
• "Now, I know I bought one of these... " begins to unpack to validate coupon.
• My go.. at last, MY GO... "Shirley, shall I do your change now?" No... go away!
• "Would you like a hand with your packing?"
• You are in Waitrose, and realise all your bags are Lidl and Aldi.
• The Boy Scouts who are helping anyway... eggs in, potatoes next, ice cream, hot doughnuts and newspaper... next bag...
• beep ... beep... beep... beep, beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep "there, it's all piled up for you now".
• Last minute sales from the till person: "can I interest you in our special? It's out-of-date chocolate". NO Thank You!!!
• A yard of till receipt, much of which is vouchers of no use to any man alive: 4p off your next purchase of Champagne.
• Forget your loyalty card... " Oh, just join the queue at helpdesk"..
• It's thirty-three long, and one assistant, who's just gone off to check the price of kumquats. She has no idea what they are, or where to find them.
• Be beep beep beep as you leave... "just check your bags"..
• Actually, it was probably that guy beside me, who smells of mouldy banana and aftershave, who's racing with that 42" TV to his BMW in the disabled parking.... Vroom... screeeech .. vroom.
• All those people who glower at you as you stop in the door to work out where you parked.
• Where DID I park???!!!???
• People who get in you way while you are moving and reading your receipt at the same time. Why shouldn't you???
• The bag that splits as you put it in the car. Produce everywhere.
• The leaflet you collected and now can't reach in the trolley.
• That mouldy banana/potato you picked up that's now hidden under the back seat....
• ME, for being so grumpy, and hating shopping, when so many others seem to love it all!0 -
DaftyDuck, I am now in absolute stitches! Thank you!!
HBS x"I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."
"It's easy to know what you're against, quite another to know what you're for."
#Bremainer0 -
• The drivers parking who go at 0.3 mph hoping for a space to appear just in front of them.
• Those that park so badly they take up 2 spaces.
• Those that park so close to someone else, their door will never open.
• Raceday drivers doing 30..... screech of brakes, parp, then vroooom.
• Disabled parking filled with likely lads in their 20's
• Trolleys left with rubbish in them - receipts, sweet packets, leaflets.
• Trolleys whose wonky wheels mean they won't go straight.
• Trolleys that are jammed together in the rack, when there are no others left.
• Automatic doors that are so slow you have to grind to a halt whilst they grumble open.
• Doors that are left open in winter, with heat billowing out.
• People coming out of the shop without looking - reading their receipt or talking on the phone
• People that grind to a halt as soon as they're through the door - in or out, they'll just stop!
• Loud music instore.
• Loud unintelligable announcements instore : BING BONG "Would Tracey from clothing plah gar to margal fant gar matbank frangle. Customer waiting": BING BONG
• The fruit & veg section, where there's clearly a mouldy banana or potato stinking it all up.
• People who just grab the first bit of fruit/veg without looking at it... but at least that mouldy potato/banana smell is now moving on.
• People who smell bad. I mean those not carrying away that mouldy banana/potato, but who obviously haven't washed.
• People who smell "nice"... or think they do, covered in a chokingly disgusting quantity of "deodorant"
• Abandoned trolleys left right across an aisle.
• Abandoned fresh or frozen food, left in the clothing aisle, 'cos they've decided not to buy it.
• The person who gets "the last one" just before you.... That triumphant smile they then give you.
• Screaming babies - the REALLY LOUD ones
• Children sneezing over the produce.
• Gossiping groups and their trolleys that block an aisle.
• Those "bargain" announcements you can't hear..."half price doughnuts, beer, ipads and chocolate in aisle splurgle. That's aisle gurgle for all you ever wanted, half price, last few left".
• BING BONG ten seconds later, because she forgot just now.
• The bloke who hasn't got a clue, on the phone to get help. "They haven't got any Stilton; would Wotsits be OK insteead? Oh, yah, yah, yah.... yah, ... yah, so... that's no, OK, yah."
• Ingredients/instructions that are written in the smallest font.
• Old sliced meat on the deli counter..please from the left heap, please from the left heap... arrgh no, from the grotty right.
• Metric/imperial confusion: "half a kilo of cheddar, please..." "That's four ounces.." as she wraps it up and passes it over.
• "Queue busters to the tills." Oh, God, I've nearly finished, and it's mayhem up at those tills.
• Which queue? Which Queue? that one... oh no, it's got a "Trainee" badge on.. swap to that longer one...
• "You don't mind if I just go to the front - I've only got these". I like to offer, not to see you forge past us all!
• Lady with a small basket in front... who then waves her husband into the queue... with his articulated trolley piled higher than he can see.
• The "divider" wars. I place the 'Next Customer' label down, next customer has to rearrange it and shove my crisps. Scrunch.
• "Them infront's" shopping. Healthy food, salads, fruit juices, quality wine, unpronounceable Italian stuff... delicious...
• "Them behind's" shopping... pizza & chips, chocolate, buns, pizza, sweets, chips, pizza, pizza and chocolate.
• Yet he's tall and handsome, she's willowy and perfect... HOW? HOW??!!
• Dilemma: lie bottles down (and leak?), stand them up (and they fall over?).
• "You mean I have to pay" lady who has to search for her purse.
• Coupon man at the front. tear... tear, trim, trim, tear.
• "Now, I know I bought one of these... " begins to unpack to validate coupon.
• My go.. at last, MY GO... "Shirley, shall I do your change now?" No... go away!
• "Would you like a hand with your packing?"
• You are in Waitrose, and realise all your bags are Lidl and Aldi.
• The Boy Scouts who are helping anyway... eggs in, potatoes next, ice cream, hot doughnuts and newspaper... next bag...
• beep ... beep... beep... beep, beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep "there, it's all piled up for you now".
• Last minute sales from the till person: "can I interest you in our special? It's out-of-date chocolate". NO Thank You!!!
• A yard of till receipt, much of which is vouchers of no use to any man alive: 4p off your next purchase of Champagne.
• Forget your loyalty card... " Oh, just join the queue at helpdesk"..
• It's thirty-three long, and one assistant, who's just gone off to check the price of kumquats. She has no idea what they are, or where to find them.
• Be beep beep beep as you leave... "just check your bags"..
• Actually, it was probably that guy beside me, who smells of mouldy banana and aftershave, who's racing with that 42" TV to his BMW in the disabled parking.... Vroom... screeeech .. vroom.
• All those people who glower at you as you stop in the door to work out where you parked.
• Where DID I park???!!!???
• People who get in you way while you are moving and reading your receipt at the same time. Why shouldn't you???
• The bag that splits as you put it in the car. Produce everywhere.
• The leaflet you collected and now can't reach in the trolley.
• That mouldy banana/potato you picked up that's now hidden under the back seat....
• ME, for being so grumpy, and hating shopping, when so many others seem to love it all!
Love this :rotfl:
katie0 -
• The drivers parking who go at 0.3 mph hoping for a space to appear just in front of them.
• Those that park so badly they take up 2 spaces.
• Those that park so close to someone else, their door will never open.
• Raceday drivers doing 30..... screech of brakes, parp, then vroooom.
• Disabled parking filled with likely lads in their 20's
• Trolleys left with rubbish in them - receipts, sweet packets, leaflets.
• Trolleys whose wonky wheels mean they won't go straight.
• Trolleys that are jammed together in the rack, when there are no others left.
• Automatic doors that are so slow you have to grind to a halt whilst they grumble open.
• Doors that are left open in winter, with heat billowing out.
• People coming out of the shop without looking - reading their receipt or talking on the phone
• People that grind to a halt as soon as they're through the door - in or out, they'll just stop!
• Loud music instore.
• Loud unintelligable announcements instore : BING BONG "Would Tracey from clothing plah gar to margal fant gar matbank frangle. Customer waiting": BING BONG
• The fruit & veg section, where there's clearly a mouldy banana or potato stinking it all up.
• People who just grab the first bit of fruit/veg without looking at it... but at least that mouldy potato/banana smell is now moving on.
• People who smell bad. I mean those not carrying away that mouldy banana/potato, but who obviously haven't washed.
• People who smell "nice"... or think they do, covered in a chokingly disgusting quantity of "deodorant"
• Abandoned trolleys left right across an aisle.
• Abandoned fresh or frozen food, left in the clothing aisle, 'cos they've decided not to buy it.
• The person who gets "the last one" just before you.... That triumphant smile they then give you.
• Screaming babies - the REALLY LOUD ones
• Children sneezing over the produce.
• Gossiping groups and their trolleys that block an aisle.
• Those "bargain" announcements you can't hear..."half price doughnuts, beer, ipads and chocolate in aisle splurgle. That's aisle gurgle for all you ever wanted, half price, last few left".
• BING BONG ten seconds later, because she forgot just now.
• The bloke who hasn't got a clue, on the phone to get help. "They haven't got any Stilton; would Wotsits be OK insteead? Oh, yah, yah, yah.... yah, ... yah, so... that's no, OK, yah."
• Ingredients/instructions that are written in the smallest font.
• Old sliced meat on the deli counter..please from the left heap, please from the left heap... arrgh no, from the grotty right.
• Metric/imperial confusion: "half a kilo of cheddar, please..." "That's four ounces.." as she wraps it up and passes it over.
• "Queue busters to the tills." Oh, God, I've nearly finished, and it's mayhem up at those tills.
• Which queue? Which Queue? that one... oh no, it's got a "Trainee" badge on.. swap to that longer one...
• "You don't mind if I just go to the front - I've only got these". I like to offer, not to see you forge past us all!
• Lady with a small basket in front... who then waves her husband into the queue... with his articulated trolley piled higher than he can see.
• The "divider" wars. I place the 'Next Customer' label down, next customer has to rearrange it and shove my crisps. Scrunch.
• "Them infront's" shopping. Healthy food, salads, fruit juices, quality wine, unpronounceable Italian stuff... delicious...
• "Them behind's" shopping... pizza & chips, chocolate, buns, pizza, sweets, chips, pizza, pizza and chocolate.
• Yet he's tall and handsome, she's willowy and perfect... HOW? HOW??!!
• Dilemma: lie bottles down (and leak?), stand them up (and they fall over?).
• "You mean I have to pay" lady who has to search for her purse.
• Coupon man at the front. tear... tear, trim, trim, tear.
• "Now, I know I bought one of these... " begins to unpack to validate coupon.
• My go.. at last, MY GO... "Shirley, shall I do your change now?" No... go away!
• "Would you like a hand with your packing?"
• You are in Waitrose, and realise all your bags are Lidl and Aldi.
• The Boy Scouts who are helping anyway... eggs in, potatoes next, ice cream, hot doughnuts and newspaper... next bag...
• beep ... beep... beep... beep, beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep "there, it's all piled up for you now".
• Last minute sales from the till person: "can I interest you in our special? It's out-of-date chocolate". NO Thank You!!!
• A yard of till receipt, much of which is vouchers of no use to any man alive: 4p off your next purchase of Champagne.
• Forget your loyalty card... " Oh, just join the queue at helpdesk"..
• It's thirty-three long, and one assistant, who's just gone off to check the price of kumquats. She has no idea what they are, or where to find them.
• Be beep beep beep as you leave... "just check your bags"..
• Actually, it was probably that guy beside me, who smells of mouldy banana and aftershave, who's racing with that 42" TV to his BMW in the disabled parking.... Vroom... screeeech .. vroom.
• All those people who glower at you as you stop in the door to work out where you parked.
• Where DID I park???!!!???
• People who get in you way while you are moving and reading your receipt at the same time. Why shouldn't you???
• The bag that splits as you put it in the car. Produce everywhere.
• The leaflet you collected and now can't reach in the trolley.
• That mouldy banana/potato you picked up that's now hidden under the back seat....
• ME, for being so grumpy, and hating shopping, when so many others seem to love it all!
Post of the year!!!!! Thank you DaftyDuck! :rotfl: :rotfl:Life is a gift... and I intend to make the most of mine :A
Never regret something that once made you smile :A0 -
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I think there should be an age restriction on the self-service tills. (An upper age limit that is...)0
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