Tips on avoiding hairwashing battles

Penny-Pincher!!

She is going to have to get used to it. She is 6, so if there is no mental reason why she is frightened of the water, then I would continue with the screaming.

Have you tried getting her to try and do it by herself? Avon do a lovely range of shampoo and body washes combined and don't sting the eyes. You could get her to wash herself down or if you assist, you help her and "accidentally" put some through her hair and just state "dont panic, its a special body/hair wash for special girls that doesn't sting eyes!" or something similar.

Have you explained the seriousness of being and keeping clean? What about age appropriate youtube videos with kids that dont have running water and how they're unable to wash but they cannot as they have no water and how lucky we are that we do?

Funky_Bold_Ribena

Don't get the shampoo out - get the clippers out and she gets the option of you using the shampoo or the clippers. Her choice.

Have you tried products like Naked shampoo/conditioner rather than ones with SLS in it? It might help.

Lozzy88

My dd is 4 and for the past 2 year its been truely awful to wash her hair, even to wet it she would scream, stand straight up and try and dive out of the bath luckily she is tiny so it wasn't too hard to sit her back down but even still she was getting her self into a panic, with her its the water.

About 3 weeks ago I don't know what even made me think of it I got her t-shirt scrunched it up and told her to cover her eyes and put her head back....... and she did it, I use a jug to wet it then I use two in one shampoo and conditoner ( am not brave enough to do seperates yet!) I also talk her all the way through it, am filling the jug, am going to pour some on tell me if its too hot/cold, yoir hairs all wet now, am putting the shampoo on, ohhhhh it smells lovely while am rubbing it in :rotfl: you get the idea

With my daughter it is the fear of the water going in her eyes and ears, but she loves swimming.

bylromarha

Thanks for all your stories. Good to know I'm not alone in this.
Yup - done pretty much all of those things, bar shaving her head. Dry shampoo idea - thank you - not tried that. Will have a read instore to see if there are any child friendly ones.

She's too big now to just get on with it - holding her in the bath is just not an option. She is far too physical about it and no amount of punishments stop her being physical - we stopped with the punishments as it felt unfair as we knew she hated it. She gets physical before we put her near a shower. It was the physicality of it last night that really was the struggle. When she gets like that, all the flannels and head tipping and careful water rinsing goes out of the window as she gets too uptight to apply them, and just wants to get out and will not calm herself in the bath. So you just have to get on with it.

She says she just hates it, she doesn't know what, but just hates doing it.

She has had her hair washed at the hairdressers, but I could see that she was steeling herself to not run out of the chair. She hates being embarrassed in public and the fear of embarrassement probably outweighed the fear of the hairwash. Since then, it's only ever had water spray on it before cutting as she didn't want to get her hair cut again due to the hairwash. So I explained about the spray and she went.

She is also my daughter, and is as stubborn as they come. She would easily go a year without a hairwash...and then some.

So dry shampoo - one useful new tip. Thanks to one and all for sharing your pain!

Funky_Bold_Ribena

Is it water in the ears? That can drive you crackers...

bylromarha

Ha ha! Just read the latest tips since I started writing. She would choose the clippers and live with the consequences.

We toured Asia over the summer and visited families who have no running water in their homes, so guilting her into hairwashing isn't going to work. She loved playing with those kids.

We've been using kids shampoos she's chosen for a while - all no sting formulas.

Talked her through it all - got her to cover her face with dry and wet flannels - have got the t-shirt (though not put it in the bath, granted) - given her control of shampoo/shower head/taps/jugs/toys/saucepans/teapot from her tea set...all to no avail.

What is SLS?

Fire_Fox

TopQuark wrote: »

Fire Fox, thanks for the links; interesting! I must admit that it's true, I've not done any research on this and you seem to have been busy investigating and testing suitable conditioners that can function as shampoo, so I bow to your greater knowledge here! (I have a PhD in chemistry but I work in particle physics now so my chem. brain is rusty and I just posted the response without verifying!).

Out of interest, which product do you recommend above others? I've got long, blonde and unruly hair so maybe I'll give this a try!!

You are welcome. Not surprised you have not researched it, washing is not the first thing that comes to mind to do with conditioner! I thought it was unscientific madness when I first read about conditioner washing, but my skin and hair were in bad shape so was [STRIKE]desperate[/STRIKE] open minded to major change.

Definitely try: my hair was more manageable and calmer literally the first week, so persevered through the few washes where I missed a patch or rinsed badly and had unclean hair. Plus my eczema vanished so no going back for me. :j I won't even let the hairdresser shampoo me now.

My personal favourite of the washing conditioners I have tried is the Inecto coconut oil conditioner - the only product in the range that is cone free so linky so picture. I get it cheap from Bodycare or Home Bargains. For the 'real' conditioning step I use Garnier Fructis repair and shine, a lot of long hairs and curly girls use it. For intensive conditioning I coconut oil overnight.

As Lostinrates says there are a few threads on the Health & Beauty board that talk about conditioner washing and about 'Curly Girl' techniques, plus there are videos on YouTube. Expect to use way more product and a somewhat different technique. You will need to do a last wash with a regular shampoo before starting, and possibly switch to a silicone free conditioner/ stylers or still shampoo once a week or you could end up with build up.

The other things that makes a major difference is styling your hair from dripping wet, leave in conditioner and/ or gel BEFORE using a microfibre towel or old t-shirt not AFTER using a terry cloth towel turban. Again I know it sounds mental but it works.

Fire_Fox

bylromarha wrote: »

What is SLS?

SLS is sodium lauryl sulphate, the most common foaming (cleansing) ingredient in washing up liquid/ shampoo/ shower gel/ hand wash, also small amounts in commercial toothpaste/ aqueous cream/ many permanent hair dyes. Also in the family are sodium dodecyl sulphate, ammonium laureth sulphate and others, some are *slightly* milder than SLS and some are 'no tears' but they still work in the same basic way. They are particularly harsh chemicals that damage both skin and hair, best avoided in eczema/ dermatitis and those with wavy/ curly/ damaged hair. Best thing I ever did for my skin and hair was to get sulphates out of my life.

1% on skin in a 'gentle' cream base (shampoo is ~20% :eek:) "Overall the areas that had been ‘treated’ were 12% thinner than the untreated areas. There was also an average 20% increase in water loss through the thinner ‘treated’ areas. This research also pinpoints one ingredient in aqueous cream as doing the damage - sodium lauryl sulfate, a harsh surfactant that truly has no place in a cream meant to treat eczema."
http://www.eczema.org/aqeous

lostinrates

Fire_Fox wrote: »

The other things that makes a major difference is styling your hair from dripping wet, leave in conditioner and/ or gel BEFORE using a microfibre towel or old t-shirt not AFTER using a terry cloth towel turban. Again I know it sounds mental but it works.

Its funny, but I always knew this was best for my hair and find it hard to remember now that others don't do this one because its not the same for non curlies. I never mind this one as its natural to me.

Shampoo though.....sometimes I need a good old psychological shampoo. :). Fusses my hair up awfully though. :rotfl:

zoesmummy_2006

artichoke wrote: »

BUT the battle now is combing long hair:eek::eek::eek:

any tips on that one anyone:o

not read the whole thread yet but saw this and had to reply, my 7 year olds hair is waist length and the best stuff I found is aussie spray leave in conditioner-seriously the brush goes through like a hot knife through butter with this stuff, and it smells good enough to eat too!!!