Tips on avoiding hairwashing battles

balletshoes

Artichoke is the long hair curly or tangly/knotty at the nape of the neck? my dd has long curly hair and it can get knotty if its not brushed through properly.
she puts her hair into 2 loose plaits every night for bed(this helps avoid tangles) and her brushes are tangle teezers. we never brush or comb her hair when wet, and i help her when she,s conditioning it by slathering loads of conditioner on the length from the nape down and separating the locks with my fingers, again from the nape of her neck.
then the conditiner gets rinsed out and hair patted to get the drips out, then left to dry naturally.

Saturnalia

Do Avon still make Quick Touch? It's a thick conditioner you put on towel-dried hair and leave in and it detangles brilliantly. It means you get to skip the rinsing out conditioner step as well.

Also, do you rub the shampoo between your hands to make a lot of lather before putting it on your daughter's hair? Do this, then use your fingers to 'comb' it into her roots and rub your hands down over the length of the hair in one sweep and that's it done. It's the quickest way I have found of coating all the hair in shampoo.

amus

Probably sound a bit evil but from a young age I've simply ignored DS1s wailing and got it done. He's now 5 and has learned that no matter what he does its going to happen so he has pretty much given up with any objection/wailing. I just give him a dry flannel when I'm finished to wipe his eyes with.

heartbreak_star

Yeah that's pretty much what my mum did. She was firm, but fair

HBS x

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

bylromarha wrote: »

DD ( 6) has never been a big fan of baths.

She's even less of a fan of showers. However, she loves swimming and going underwater.

We wash hair once a week and every single week its another battle.

We've tried every reward chart/trick/encouragement/positivity under the sun. Doesn't work.

We've tried punishments and removing objects and treats - doesn't work.

We've given her control over the washing - doesn't work.

We've tried baths at all times of the day - doesn't work.

We've given her both forewarning it'll be happening later in the day and no notice at all. Neither work to stop the behaviour.

We've never made it a big deal, but as soon as hairwash is mentioned, you see her change from a lovely polite little lady into this monster foaming at the mouth.

It was particularly draining tonight. So just wondered if there's something I've missed. Any tips please?

DD1 was 'cured' by going to the hairdresser and having her hair washed without any worries about splashes on her face. For a few days afterwards, we did a similar way with her leaning against the sink on a chair with a towel at her neck, but then she said she'd try it the normal way.

Admittedly, at 20, she still says in her own home, she's getting a hairdresser sink and her husband will have to do it for her if he wants to marry her. But the relief when she was little to not have a shrieking monster every night!

Hiddenidenity

amus wrote: »

Probably sound a bit evil but from a young age I've simply ignored DS1s wailing and got it done. He's now 5 and has learned that no matter what he does its going to happen so he has pretty much given up with any objection/wailing. I just give him a dry flannel when I'm finished to wipe his eyes with.

I do the same as this with my two.

iammumtoone

I feel for you I have the same trouble with my son. He only gets his washed once a week and I dread that time. I got one of these http://www.amazon.co.uk/Clippasafe-CL201-Shampoo-Shield/dp/B000G1TDNI/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1366715806&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=shampoo+shiledl

It doesn't help us but that's not to say it won't help you (worth a try for a couple of quid) It is a very good product and would stop the water running down the face if only my son would stop pulling it off as soon as I put it on:(

My current method is just to get on with it. I hate it, I wouldn't mind the screaming whilst I am doing it but this goes on for at least half an hour after we have finished -

FattyBettyBoo

My DD isn't very good at this either.

The only thing that has helped us is using googles in the bath, and a tangleTeezer

julie2710

I used to have this trouble with my two boys. They didn't even like the bath to be honest and at one point DS1 used to scream for 30 minutes while I tried to force him in either a bath or shower and that was ignoring the hair washing! :eek:

In the end I encouraged them with playing in the shower cubicle. I would give them a plastic bowl each, hand them the shower head and fill one of the bowls with shower foam. To start with they would wash the shower cubicle. Then they started on themselves and before long they were tipping bowls of water over their heads. And it was all mess free contained in the shower

They both used t be fine swimming too. It was probably easier with them being boys and having short hair to not worry for a little while. Now they wash their hair every time they are in the shower even when I say not to bother as its later

Fire_Fox

TopQuark wrote: »

Not if you want clean hair you can't.

The chemistry of shampoo and conditioner is not the same and thus their effects are different. Shampoo contains detergent, a surfactant that is amphiphillic - this means that it has both water-attracting and oil-attracting properties. The surfactant molecules' oil-attracting ends 'stick' to grease and oil and other dirt in the hair and 'pull' it into the water to be washed away.

Conditioner on the other hand is composed mainly of moisturisers, oils and glossing agents like silicones and polymers. These ingredients 'coat' the hair to alter texture and appearance, but they won't clean it.

Sorry, it's the scientist in me!

Over twenty years in various aspects of science myself tho admittedly largely biological disciplines so I struggled with the cosmetic science/ chemistry initially! You didn't read my post properly, I said "certain types of conditioner".

The products used for conditioner-only washing contain a high percentage of cationic surfactants AKA emulsifiers which is how they cleanse the hair. These plus water are actually the first two ingredients in most conditioners, read the bottles in your shower. Some of the mainstream brands have jumped on the bandwagon now and are selling 'cleansing conditioners' (eg. L'Oreal Evercreme and WEN) which formulation wise are similar to the conditioners we curlies and long hairs use to cleanse. It's also the same 'technology' in a cleansing lotion for facial skin, or those with dermatological complaints using aqueous cream to wash the body.

Note that most products used successfully for conditioner-only are low/ no oil and low/ no silicone, a regular heavy conditioner does not work it does not contain enough of the cationic surfactants. Technique is also key, you use enough water and massage to actually get a light 'lather' up. The MSE amongst use use the cheapest brands going - ones that are useless as conditioners - stuff like Tesco Value, Asda Smartprice, Suave, Inecto, Boots Essentials. I wash with Inecto coconut oil conditioner which contains three surfactants/ emulsifiers "water, cetearyl alcohol, stearalkonium chloride, cetrimonium chloride, coconut oil, fragrance, magnesium nitrate, methylchloro-isothiazolinone, magnesium chloride, methylisothiazolinone, citric acid."

You cannot get rid of build up of certain styling products nor silicone heavy conditioners out with conditioner-only washing, so we use products which are free of certain ingredients like many of the silicones (-xane, -cone, -conol) and some of the polyquaterniums. IIRC some do come out even with CO-washing but I haven't ever made the effort to find out which, it's easier to avoid all.

From a subjective N=1 perspective I can assure you conditioner-only washing works, I've been doing so for over two years. I can get a heavy coconut oiling out (several tablespoons saturating mid length hair) or unwashed for over a week (was sick) so total rats tails with sebum to glossy and bouncy and 'squeaky'. I receive regular complements on my hair which I clearly would not if it stank or looked greasy, never had any kind of 'personal hygiene' warning at work either (public facing! :eek:).

Try reading the articles on naturallycurly.com, specifically those by "Tonya McKay [who] holds a B.S. in Chemistry and an M.S. in Polymer Science", she is great for putting the science into plain English which I absolutely needed initially
http://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/author/tonyamckay
http://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/products-ingredients/cationic-surfactants-in-curly-hair-care-products

Also check out the Curltalk, British Curlies or Longhaircommunity forums, plenty of ladies who conditioner wash post photographs of their shampoo free hair, some of which look exactly like a haircare product advert.