Importance of Friends?

Lilith1980

Your story sounds similar to mine. I used to hang around in a big group of friends and we used to see each other most weekends and go out drinking.

I haven't had a drink since Christmas as I felt the time was right for me to give up - I had abused alcohol over the years and up until recently it had just become a bad habit which I turned to when I was stressed.

My OH has stopped as well, I'm not sure if he will go back to having the odd drink but that doesn't bother me as I don't intend to in any case and I know he wouldn't pressure me. However, I do feel our lack of drinking has had an impact on our friendships and we don't see friends much anymore.

The thing is, my OH and I are happy like that. We may see a few friends once every 4-5 months but we do our own thing at home. We're both studying for our masters degrees so we do spend time at home typing away on our laptops!

I think if you are comfortable being at home with your family then that is great. My OH says now and then that we must seem boring to other people but I don't care (I don't think he is bothered either really!). My days of going out and getting lashed are over and I am content with a more settled way of life. I'd rather spend my money on us going out for meals or having weekends away.

Sometimes my OH's friends from years back get in touch and they want to meet up with him but he doesn't seem interested. I do encourage him to see them because I guess I worry that he might not be meeting up with them in case it upsets me (he had a jealous ex). But he says he doesn't have anything in common with those friends anymore.

Life changes, and we have people in our lives who are right at certain points. Nothing ever stays the same...and as long as you are happy then that is all that matters. Not sure why your wife thinks you are too dependent - maybe it is because she has an active social life and she finds it hard to comprehend that you might be happy as you are?

Sorry for waffling

nfollows1982

FBaby wrote: »

Considering you have been having issues with your marriage

I've absolutely no idea where you got that from but I haven't said anything about having issues with my marriage??

We've just very happily celebrated the birth of our baby daughter and our first wedding anniversary!!

We've got a very good marriage thank you!!

mustmakealist

You sound like a lovely chap who is happy with your family. Your OH sounds as though she enjoys the time that she spends with her friends and wants to ensure that you can do the same. Perhaps she would like to see you with an interest outside the home that means you are not totally reliant on your home and family for everything.

You mentioned that your friends originally were all gym members until it closed down. Maybe she is thinking that if you joined a gym or something similar it would bring you health benefits and get you out and about a bit.

I'm not sure how old your kids are but have they got any interests/hobbies that you could help with? Some of my best friends now are those that I met whilst encouraging and supporting mine.

If you were to develop an obsession for fishing or golf and it was to take you out of the house for hours on end it might be another story

I think that she has your best interests at heart.