How would you feel

SuzieSue

Hanwood01 wrote: »

fluffnutter wrote: »

Thank you for finally giving us the detail that we need to answer you properly.

Here's what I think... you were at a funeral, !!!!!!. Don't you think it's a bit disrespectful to spend your time worrying whether your mate does/doesn't fancy you, is being rude by pulling faces/not pulling faces, not to mention the other mates who spend their time teasing people?

Just saying.[/

Fluffnutter
Considering it was his uncles funeral, I think he's the one who was being disrespectful. In any case would you be hurt if you suffered badly with facial eczema, like i do, and your friends treated you like that?

Don't let people like Fluffnutter upset you. People on here are too quick to judge when they don't know anything (but to be fair, you didn't really give us much to go on).

Now we know what happened, I think everyone would be upset in your situation. How old is your friend? He sounds like he is around 10 but he can't be if you have known him for 15 years. People can do things they wouldn't normally do when they are embarassed, but that is no excuse. You mustn't let people like that upset you or they will have won.

londonsurrey

There are people we know, that we've fallen into the habit of spending time with.

Some are genuine clowns, and not malicious. If you recognise that, and love them for it, then there is no cause for concern.

If, as it sounds in this case, you're starting to recognise that actually, you don't like their behaviour and attitude, then the most productive thing you can do with your future time is to note them to be people you have history with, but to spend time and effort finding new people to be friends with, whose standards and morals you actually like and respect.

Hanwood01

SuzieSue wrote: »

Hanwood01 wrote: »

Don't let people like Fluffnutter upset you. His/her name says it all. People on here are too quick to judge when they don't know anything (but to be fair, you didn't really give us much to go on).

Now we know what happened, I think everyone would be upset in your situation. How old is your friend? He sounds like he is around 10 but he can't be if you have known him for 15 years. People can do things they wouldn't normally do when they are embarassed, but that is no excuse. You mustn't let people like that upset you or they will have won.

Thank you SusieSue, and apologies for the initial lack of information.

My friend is 50 years old :eek: and I guess I was hurt as in all the years I've known him, he has never been anything but pleasant and we always had a bit of banter when we met each other.

Hanwood01

londonsurrey wrote: »

There are people we know, that we've fallen into the habit of spending time with.

Some are genuine clowns, and not malicious. If you recognise that, and love them for it, then there is no cause for concern.

If, as it sounds in this case, you're starting to recognise that actually, you don't like their behaviour and attitude, then the most productive thing you can do with your future time is to note them to be people you have history with, but to spend time and effort finding new people to be friends with, whose standards and morals you actually like and respect.

Londonsurrey - it has taken me a long time to realise he isn't the genuine person or friend I thought he was. Sadly, we no longer speak.:(

mrcow

I think what your friend did was hurtful.

If someone was teasing me about being with a friend (whether I fancied them or not) I'd probably announce loudly that they were out of my league and give them a hug, not make stupid faces about it. Because that's what you do with friends. You stick by them and care about their feelings.

I'm not surprised you're upset. The eczema is obviously a hang up for you, and you're linking it because of it. But really, it just sounds like your "friend" is a bit of an idiot.

sassyblue

Hanwood01 wrote: »

Considering it was his uncles funeral, I think he's the one who was being disrespectful. In any case would you be hurt if you suffered badly with facial eczema, like i do, and your friends treated you like that?

Thank you for giving us the details. What sort of face did he pull, a 'don't go there ' face as someone suggested or just rolled his eyes or something?

Are you sure you didn't misunderstand his reaction was one of 'oh don't be silly' to shut the teasing people up for being childish?

I guess not if you're hurt.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Hanwood01 wrote: »

Considering it was his uncles funeral, I think he's the one who was being disrespectful. In any case would you be hurt if you suffered badly with facial eczema, like i do, and your friends treated you like that?

What on earth does eczema have to do with any of it?

You're overreacting.

Pollycat

Hanwood01 wrote: »

How would you feel if you caught a friend making faces at you behind your back. Would you be hurt or would you let it go over your head?

Hanwood01 wrote: »

My friend is 50 years old :eek: and I guess I was hurt as in all the years I've known him, he has never been anything but pleasant and we always had a bit of banter when we met each other.

A 50 year old man being teased by his friends for talking to a woman he's known for years - and at the funeral of the guy's uncle?

It doesn't sound like any of the people I associate with.

Hanwood01 wrote: »

Londonsurrey - it has taken me a long time to realise he isn't the genuine person or friend I thought he was. Sadly, we no longer speak.:(

How long ago did this happen?

You say in the 2nd quote that he's only ever been pleasnat until this incident (at the funeral) but now you no longer speak.

It sounds ages ago.

Are you sure you haven't misjudged one look before cutting this person out of your life?

Pollycat

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

What on earth does eczema have to do with any of it?

You're overreacting.

I agree.

If the OP and this guy had known each other for years (as she has posted), and this is the first time he's 'treated' her like that, I think she may well have misread the situation.
Unless the guy is an Oscar-worthy actor.

This is one thread that I would love to read the other side of.

C_Mababejive

If i thought it was malicious or intended to ridicule me in front of others, i;d ask them !!!!!! they were doing?