What does your younger teen do in school hols while you are at work?

easy

After several years of working for myself, working from home or being able to manage work largely around school hols, the recession has hit me too hard, and I'm having to take a part-time job.

This will take me out of the house for 6 hours per day, 4 days per week. It's the perfect job for working around school days, I know I'm lucky to find it (only had to job-search for a week too), but I'm fretting a bit about school holiday days.

DS is 13 and a half, used to being on his own now and then for a day at a time. I'm not worried about him setting fire to the house or anything like that, but I know he'll choose to spend most of his time alone on t'internet, playing games. All that time in a week is more than I'd like.

Do I have a choice, any option ? I could deploy some time limiting software on the PC, but he'll just transfer to vegging out in front of the TV instead. I'm afraid DS just isn't into sports (hubby isn't sporting and I'm disabled, so we haven't led him well there), and he wouldn't willingly go to sports type events at the leisure centre or so on. I particularly don't want my new job to cause relationship probs between me & DS.

He normally meets up with mates from his school (not a local school) one or two days in a school hols, and I would expect that to continue of course, but Easter hol is 3 weeks long, and when we get to summer .... :eek:

I might be fretting (motherhood is all about feeling guilty, isn't it), and I know loads of other families have had this problem from very early on, I've been really lucky. Just looking for ideas about other parents manage that teenage - too old for childminder - stage.

suki1001

I know my ds wants a part time job as soon as she legally can. Is there a job or anything your ds might want to do to earn some extra £'s. They can work up to 25 hours in a week outside term time in a week (although that seems a lot). Just a suggestion, might solve the hanging around at home on his own and give him something valuable to put on his cv?

balletshoes

Do you have any family nearby with kids? My sister and I work our long school holidays out so I can have my niece (13) some of the time at my house, and she can have my daughter (12) some of the time at hers. Then they at least have some company, even if they are just having a lazy day around the house.

WantToBeSE

hi Easy,
I am afraid that I can't answer your question, but i am interested in any responses you get.
i too have a 13 year old, and he will have to stay home alone 8.30am-3.30pm Mon-Fri during the holidays.
I understand what you mean about the computer time-I fear that my son would just sit on his xbox if I allowed him to, but I want him doing something else.

Spendless

Hi, my son was 13 a week ago. After his 1st term at Secondary school I lost my finish at 3pm job and it took me 6 months to find something else and that is only on an 'as and when basis (mainly providing holiday cover) and when I do work it is f-time hours of 9am-5pm. Here the wrap around care based at schools which have 7.30/8am till 6pm hours only cater for end of yr 6/until 12th birthday and the only others are sports based camps whose running hours don't co-incide with the hours I do and I can't send him to make his own way to and fro because he has to be signed in and out by an adult.

I let mine stay up longer in an evening so he is still asleep for part of the morning, long after we all go to work. As long as his homework is completed for the return to school, I don't mind if mine is on the PC, or watching tv as it's his holiday time.

Does he dislike all sports? My 'fun' leisure pool runs a summer passport where you can have unlimited ice-skating or swimming or both for a discounted price. You could also suggest he goes to the cinema or meet you at your workplace for lunch. The sports clubs which do take for teens aren't always running sports on every day, sometimes they have trips on, mine has been to fishing comps and science museums and wildlife parks.

In the days when I did have a regular job, I would look at the school hols and plan my AL accordingly, my husband would do the same and then we'd allocate a week away all of us as a family. If work would allow it, I was a fan of booking AL mid-week to mid-week as it limited the amount of days per week that you needed to find something for them to do.

**professor~yaffle**

I would think at 13 and a half he is too young to look for work, but would there be any other kind of activities he might like to do, locally? He'll get really bored once the days turn into weeks and I guess being on the internet for hours on end isn't too good, even though he'll be able to chat to his friends, etc online.

We used to live in a semi-rural area and my youngest brother used to go and help out over at the farm during the holidays. He used to enjoy it and it got him out of the house and talking to people.

easy

suki1001 wrote: »

I know my ds wants a part time job as soon as she legally can. Is there a job or anything your ds might want to do to earn some extra £'s. They can work up to 25 hours in a week outside term time in a week (although that seems a lot). Just a suggestion, might solve the hanging around at home on his own and give him something valuable to put on his cv?

Oh Blimey, that's a thought. What type of job tho ?? Only thing I can think of is paper-boy, which would be out of the house when I'm actually at home - altho' it might wear him out enough for my working hours not to be a problem. I don't think he would go for that idea just yet, the Easter holidays will be the first time this has happened, and currently he says he's looking forward to some quiet time alone without me 'pestering' him ... cheeky so and so.

balletshoes wrote: »

Do you have any family nearby with kids? My sister and I work our long school holidays out so I can have my niece (13) some of the time at my house, and she can have my daughter (12) some of the time at hers. Then they at least have some company, even if they are just having a lazy day around the house.

No, unfortunately not, no rellies about at all, my mum and sister both live 130 miles away, none on Dh's side. Sis (who doesn't work and has a 10 year-old foster son) has already said she'll have DS to stay for a few days in the summer hols, but he wouldn't want to be there long - and I don't want to send him away anyway.

I did talk to him over dinner last night about him dealing with some laundry and maybe clearing up the kitchen and stuff on school holiday days when I'm working. He agreed it would be fine ... but we'll see when it actually starts

Seanymph

Mine are left a list of things to do, which generally isn't, and they phone me a lot - everything from 'what is there to eat' to 'are you on your way home yet;

They walk the dog, YS goes fishing (I drop him off on the way in, and pick him up on the way home).

They meet mates and go swimming.

Remote parenting is very difficult - but possible.

peachyprice

I honestly wouldn't get too hung up on him playing on hic PC too long while you're out, at least you know he's home and safe, not bored wandering the streets.

By the time he gets up (which will be late:D) and has done the chores you've set him, then had his lunch, then had a chat to his mates or gone swimming/visiting/shops, done some holiday homework etc it won't be too long before you're home. Just limit the time he spends on it when you are home and try to get him out of the house at the weekend.

Oh, and if your budget can stretch to it and you have shops nearby, give him lunch mone rather that leave food, he'll soon get off the PC to buy lunch when he gets hungry!

Spendless

I did wonder about fishing too. I *think* when I looked into it last year, that my son couldn't fish without an adult until he was 14, but that might have just been my local park.

thunderbird

My 13 year old doesn't get up till late morning anyhow, so that's part of the time accounted for!
Other than that, he plays on pc or xbox, goes out with friends at least a few days a week and between myself and my husband we cover as much time as possible with our annual leave.