fallen for kids teacher

Couchiex3

I don't know why everybody is so against it? They are both adults, they can both make their own choices, I wouldn't see any harm in getting involved with a teacher if I had a child who attended the school where they worked.

emsywoo123

..........

peachyprice

Leaving aside whether or not this thtread is real, I really don't understand why teachers are putting themselves/people are putting them up on such a pedestal.

Most people are assuming that the relationship is doomed, that there will be fall out, that people will get hurt. But this goes for any dating couple, regardless of profession, especially those working in the same place, but it doesn't stop anyone else, people meet at work all the time, and people deal with a break up professionally, all the time. What is it about teachers that they feel they couldn't deal with a relationship or breakup professionally?

I understand the damage and scandal if the parent were married and ran off with the teacher, obvioulsy that is unprofessional, but where both adults are single?

So what would happen if you met a really great man/woman on a night out, you're a single parent, they happen to be a teacher, you date a few times, get on really well, think this could be IT, then you find out quite by chance that they teach and your child's school. Is that it, game over? You'd throw away a good relationship because the teacher can't separate their home life and working life? Seems a bit of an over-reaction to me.

fawd1

Also, unless the teacher in question is at a tiny school with only one teacher per year, then would they not be able to ensure that in the case of a relationship happening they were not teaching the OPs child?

I know my friend who's a primary school teacher has said that if her daughter ends up going to her school, she will just make sure that it is the other teacher for that year who's class she's in. This happens a lot, so wouldn't be too weird.

seven-day-weekend

fawd1 wrote: »

Also, unless the teacher in question is at a tiny school with only one teacher per year, then would they not be able to ensure that in the case of a relationship happening they were not teaching the OPs child?

I know my friend who's a primary school teacher has said that if her daughter ends up going to her school, she will just make sure that it is the other teacher for that year who's class she's in. This happens a lot, so wouldn't be too weird.

My husband taught in the school where my son was a pupil (son was there before husband). No problem at all, he even taught him once.

As regards the OP, I think it would be better if the teacher was not directly involved with the OP's son, although otherwise I do not think it is a problem. If it's a primary school, just wait until he leaves |:)

maman

peachyprice wrote: »

Leaving aside whether or not this thread is real, I really don't understand why teachers are putting themselves/people are putting them up on such a pedestal.

It's not that they put themselves up on the pedestal, they are put there by the (written) professional standards that the government lays down and the expectations of parents and others that they will behave professionally.

It's not accurate to compare the OP's question with other workplace relationships. Teachers do get together with other teachers. That's not the point. It's the whole teacher/parent/child situation and the potential conflict with professional behaviour.

I know a teacher who had a relationship with a parent and the ex came storming into school being aggressive and making (false) accusations. There was huge amounts of damaging gossip amongst parents and pupils. Many parents seemed to be enjoying the drama/soap opera. Time that should have been spent on supporting children's learning was spent on dealing with all the fall out. The teacher ended up damaging their CV and career prospects. The parent(s) just moved on. They play by different rules. teachers have a lot to lose risking such a relationship.

thorsoak

Remember the style of the late-lamented posters "lifeisbutadream" and "darknessismyfriend"? There was another one as well, which I cannot remember - but monosyllabic to start with, little titbits of info as the theme developed .......

hunters

helplesssaddo wrote: »

It has developed over a period and it is driving me insane I am so confused over whether it could be.I would hate to not talk to them.I want everything and go to bed wishing I was cuddled in to them:o Want to make them happy. I will not even go into what they do to my libido:o:rotfl:

age 16 at a guess

peachyprice

maman wrote: »

It's not that they put themselves up on the pedestal, they are put there by the (written) professional standards that the government lays down and the expectations of parents and others that they will behave professionally.

Pretty much everyone has that written into their contract by their employers, it just so happens that teachers employers are the Government, it isn't an oath teachers swear to the government and has no more credence than any other contract of employment. It isn't written that they cannot have a relationship with a parent is it, and if both are single there is no lack of professionalism, other than in other people opinion/imagination.

It's not accurate to compare the OP's question with other workplace relationships. Teachers do get together with other teachers. That's not the point. It's the whole teacher/parent/child situation and the potential conflict with professional behaviour.

Every school my children have attended has had pupils who are the children of teachers at the school, at DD's last school even the head had her daughter at the school. But that conflict is acceptable?

I know a teacher who had a relationship with a parent and the ex came storming into school being aggressive and making (false) accusations. There was huge amounts of damaging gossip amongst parents and pupils. Many parents seemed to be enjoying the drama/soap opera. Time that should have been spent on supporting children's learning was spent on dealing with all the fall out. The teacher ended up damaging their CV and career prospects. The parent(s) just moved on. They play by different rules. teachers have a lot to lose risking such a relationship.

That can happen at any school to any teacher who has an irrate ex who isn't even a parent and is an extreme example of what may happen, not what will.

Sorry, I still can't see the problem.

Indout96

As a teacher in secondary school you know you're getting old when the parents are of an age where one would want to date them!

No - you are getting old when you taught the parents 20 years ago. most of my old teachers taught my daughter - it was really odd at parents evening (mind you I hated school)