Why are you a DFW?

immoral_angeluk

Sounds obvious that we all want to get rid of our debt but what's the reason that you're here today? Who are you doing it for and why?

Personally I'm a DFW because although we don't have a lot of debt by most people's standards, we are on a low income and were facing a massive meltdown if we didn't sort something out. We did have an extravagant lifestyle or anything but because of everything we weren't enjoying life as we should've been. I was 6 months pregnant when we had our LBM and it dawned on us that were going to have another baby to add to the already tight situation! Here we are 7 months later and we've got 2 beautiful girls and are in such a better position than we were. Things are still tight, but not as tight as to cause us sleepless nights anymore.

Miss_Scarlett

I thought I was debt free until the OH confessed to a couple of credit cards with a mighty balance. So, I'm trying to get these cleared with him, his debt is my debt and all of that. We've cut our outgoings to the bone, am trying hard to cut our grocery bills, ebaying etc.

We would like to move out of the country within the next few years so I'm trying to build up a good fund for that

OberonSH

Likewise, Mr & Mrs Obi will be moving to florida, and we can't do that without being debtfree and having some cash behind us. So every £2 coin is a step nearer!

Plus I'm sick of having no money.

skylight

Things are no where near as tight for us now as the were pre-LBM. Every single month we would pay credit cards and re-spend over and above what we had paid back! Again, not on an extravagant lifestyle, but dinner out, odd DVD/CDs etc soon adds up really really fast.

Big family problems, jobs lost, really low point was when the council issued a summons to take the house back as we were behind on the rent. That point was the turn around. So far behind, we faced bankruptcy. It took a year of ignoring the debts (naughty, I know) and not one issued any proceedings/threats they could carry out etc within that time. The year of ignoring everyone meant we could get to grips with our spending.

Proper budgets drawn up, learnt to stick with them and I am so surprised at what we have now. Frivilous spending has gone, things are saved for and I now do have enough that I can buy the occasional item of clothing and save enough to have a holiday (never overseas though! Too many kids to be cost effective!) Our attitudes to what we need has changed too.

The year of ignoring the debts gave us some breathing space to sort out ourselves (with lots of help from here!) and we can now re-pay what we owe, without going without.

So we are DFW and happier for it!

tesuhoha

Well, I just keep imagining what life would be like if all of this money Im paying out now was mine. I keep imagining saving, saving for a rainy day, having enough money to renovate the house without borrowing, saving for holidays, being able to buy clothes when I want and not necessarily in a sale. I keep imagining being able to go to the supermarket and buy wine and expensive fruit and whatever I want. I imagine being able to buy my son some new clothes as he hasnt had any in over a year. Id like to go on a girlie day out with my daughter and to buy her a nice lunch. I imagine being able to buy some plants for the garden, having days out and mini breaks. I imagine going out to eat sometimes. I imagine being able to pay for a swimming membership. I would love to have all these things but if I do then none of them will cause me debt because once its gone Im never going to let us get into debt again. Most of all though, I want my whole family to benefit from being debtfree. I cant do anything for anyone at the moment. My poor husband is working today and will probably work the whole weekend. He works all of the time to try to help us out of this situation and it would be really nice if he could relax and take some time off. It would be really nice if I could tell him that we had savings and that we were doing well and that he didnt have to worry.

chevalier

I want to be debt free, so I can say up yours to all those institutions that screw people over. So that I can choose the best financial institution, not just the one that will give us some money.

And also to help out other people on here
chev

crawley_girl

Ditto what Tes has just said, except it's just me that I have to support.

I often think about all the things that I could spend my money on instead of debt repayments and that kinda spurred me into action.

I was sick of worrying about money and not having any and now I have clear direction, clear goals and some money save in a savings account (contingency fund). Who would of thought?!

onedayiwill

I knew I had to do something about my debt for a long time. I got a good kick when the bank said they were withdrawing my £2000 overdraft (which was at its limit). But that wasn't my LBM - I agreed with the bank that I would pay it off at £200 per month, and apart from having to find that extra £200 per month, life went on as normal. Minimum payments on CC etc etc.

A few months later, in January this year, Mr OneDay and I went on holiday to visit my friends in Costa Rica. We had a wonderful time, and fell completely in love with the country and culture - the 'good' and the 'bad'.

We have been a little restless for a while, wanting a change but not sure what, and I was surprised when on the plane home Mr OneDay said that we should look into moving there for a while. I was even more surprised a few days later when Mr OneDay started talking about the possibility of selling our house to fund this change in our lives....he was serious. And I was delighted - the idea of living in Costa Rica and being near my friends .... with wonderful Mr OneDay. Who could ask for more?

And then it dawned on me. I had nearly £11,000 of debt that Mr OneDay didn't know about. If we did this, I couldn't start our new life with that debt, and if we were going to do this I needed to pay it off. So that was my trigger.

I am a DFW because I want a different life. I am doing it for myself. And if we don't move to Costa Rica, well, I'll still be debt free and able to enjoy my life without the stress of debt (and pay for more holidays in CR to visit my friends).

Either way, debt free life will be wonderful and I love working towards it.

laurajayne

Well, to be honest, I've been pants with money and credit ever since I could have them! A nice mixture of my own stupidity, a breakdown in a relationship which saw me move back into my family home, and the fact that I never had any money (and what little I did have I spend on rubbish), the LB had to go on....eventually It took me til whenever i joined here last year to actually get my act together with my money.

After a long slog, and to begin with, having even less money than before, I'm now £2,099 in debt, and should be debt free by the end of the year (not including my car that I'm buying off my parents - good debt that one though ) In that time I've had a bonus from work, and a bank charges refund, and although I bought ahem, twogorgeous Radley handbags from the combined total, most went to clear my debts.

For the first time, I am going on holiday in July, and I've actually started saving for it! Next year I will pay for 2 weeks in Cyprus in cash. :j

And after a hideous 18 months with health, work, and whatnot, I am actually going to go on a weekend away next bank holiday :j :j :j But I have learnt a lot - the hotel we are staying at was £130 a night on their site....I found it at £70...through Quidco :beer:

I may not be the strictest DFW ever, but once a DFW nerd, always a nerd

medman

Hi

I'm here to learn, and pass on any pearls I might have gathered along the way.

We were in deep debt when we had a young family, CC, consolidation, CC, consolidation: trouble! :eek:

With the help of a benevolent brother we crawled our way out of the hole and we are determined not ever to be that way again!!:mad:

So we're now not in debt :T but we continue to apply the principles to stay that way! :A We are now trying to accumulate tax efficient savings for our retirement in the next 10-15 years.

Accumulating savings and clearing debt need the same focus on not wasting money and get value for money when you do spend. What I would say is that clearing £30K is a lot lot harder than accumulating £30K. Both psychologically and practically: as you pay off debt the lender keeps taking money off you in interest, but as you accumulate savings the bank give you a little more!

But staying out of debt still needs a DFW mind set, the temptation to return to your old ways once you are clear of the burden is nearly overwhelming. You think you deserve it! But the emotion that made you spend can be redirected to saving and the buzz of watching it grow lasts longer than the buzz of bringing something back from the shops, when the thrill soon turns to guilt, denial and then back to the shops.

So we feel a bit of a fraud being on here, but both OH and I take a lot from the mixture of people on here and try and give a little back when we can. And even when you have completed the journey the sage advice given here is still very useful.

Thanks to everyone and Good luck to all

MM:D

tigzem

My LBM came when a debt collector knocked on my door at 8pm! He was a nice chap, very understanding and wasn't at all threatening. It took this to stop me ignoring my debts. Also, BF and I may want to live together one day so I need to clear my debts 1st. Also, (sorry!) I want financial security for my DD, want my own house etc.

Couldn't have done a lot of it without help from fellow DFW's... you know who you are x