Teenage girls and their 'wants'

Dunroamin

thehappybutterfly wrote: »

That's a really good idea Lara! She's fantastic at art and that could be a project for her.



She's thinking about lyrics either round her wrist, at the base of her neck or round her ankle. She has long hair so a neck one would be covered. And I think delicate ones around wrists are lovely. But I'll put the kibosh on an ankle tattoo! Too reminiscent of electronic tags!

She may not always have long hair! You really need to explain to her that if she has tattoos on her wrists she may have to spend much of her working life sweltering in long sleeves in hot weather.

As a parent, you may not be able to stop her doing certain things once she's 18 but it's your responsibility to explain to her how the adult working world works.

miss_independent

thehappybutterfly wrote: »

Ha! I mentioned tattoos to her 5 minutes ago and said "I have a suggestion...." and got no further when she butted in with "Don't say henna"!

Lol! In all seriousness though, I don't mean henna. I mean semi-permanent as in the ones that last a few years. If she's still happy with it in 5 years and it's fading/faded by then she can always get it re-done permanently. Only thing is, they don't fade evenly.

Robin_TBW

What I'd say is ANY tattoo she wants to have, she has to think about it for one year. If she doesn't change the idea, wording, design or anything else in that time, even a little bit then maybe let her go for it. If she changes it even one bit then that year starts again.

I've gone with this and have no tattoos. Partly because of that, then partly because I'd rather save money and it's expensive.

Although, I think lyrics are a bad idea. My favourite songs when I was 16 I look back at and cringe (I'm now 25). People change too much, especially when young. Also, I would never pay for my kid to get a tattoo. If they want it that much then they'll go to the expense themselves... although then probably go for the cheapest option possible and live to regret it - but that would teach them a lesson.

Lance

There are many jobs where long hair has to be tied up. In this country there are not massive amounts of jobs available and competition is keen so you and daughter need to consider the effect of visible tattoos on a future employer.

moromir

I used to work in a bridal shop and I lost count of the women who would come in, try on a bridal dress and burst in to tears in the middle of the shop... why you ask?

Because a beautifully fitting £4,000 dress couldn't hide the fact there was a tattoo on their shoulder blade / neck / arm and that they were never going to look like 'classy' or 'like a princess' on their wedding day.

Now that isn't my opinion of them I hasten to add, but I certainly wouldn't want a tattoo in my wedding pictures.

I'd say the majority went on to get the things lasered off at great pain and cost before their wedding day.

Lance

Treevo wrote: »

The legal age limit for drinking alcohol is five and there's no age limit for posing for naked photographs and videos, or else all those videos of kids at bath time would be illegal and they are not. Nudity does not equal pornography.

Luckily the post was clear enough for everyone else to know what I was refering to and get the point.

Dunroamin

Imagine going through life with the words of Bohemian Rhapsody tattooed on your wrists!

pigpen

I think cigarettes and alcohol should be illegal... but 21 at a minimum.

Driving 18 at the earliest

marriage.. 30 at least Or just do away with it.

sex .. 18.. because education should be compulsory until then.

tattoos and other bodily disfigurement.. never, it is disgusting.

dizziblonde

Dunroamin wrote: »

Imagine going through life with the words of Bohemian Rhapsody tattooed on your wrists!

Girl I was at school with managed to blag someone to do one for her aged about 14/15 (no idea who or how - we were a year older and wouldn't have exactly been horrified at the breech of the law or asking questions)... now, while you're a rebellious rock-loving teenager circa the early 90s, the biohazard symbol on your hip might seem a great homage to the band... I wonder what she thinks of it 20 years plus down the line somehow!

teaandcakeordeath

I had a tattoo at 16. It was a terrible idea. TERRIBLE! I had it covered over when I was 25- the problem with cover-up tattoos though is that you can still see a ghost of what is underneath and they are often much bigger and darker in colour. If I could go back to my 16 year old self I'd try and talk some sense into me! Don't get me wrong- I love my cover up tattoo- I spent 5 years designing it to cover up my moment of madness. I do wish it wasn't a cover up though! I think the designing herself idea is a really good one.

As for the other things:- the legal age of consent for s e x I think is appropriate as long as you have a parent like yourself who is open, honest and has a good relationship with their child. I spoke to my mum about losing my virginity when I was 16 and she listened, offered advice, talked me through contraception options and made sure that I knew what to expect emotionally and physically. I decided to wait until I was 17 and I'm now married to my first boyfriend- but I always kept my mum in the loop as she'd treated me like an adult and equal rather than dictating to me what I should or shouldn't do.

As for drinking- again, my mum and a friends mum took a group of us into town to celebrate the end of our GCSEs- they showed us what bars they were happy with us being in and where they wanted us to avoid. My mum's motivating factor was that she didn't want us walking the streets drinking and harassing people outside of off licenses (as I often see 16 year olds doing now) and trusted us enough to respect the rules they had made. I also think that she knew we might have tried to go to town with or without their say so- so for them to take the lead it gave them back the power and also made us think they were amazing (she still is! )

Now I appreciate some people may think this is too young but I believe very much that it depends on the maturity of the 16 year old. Your daughter sounds pretty mature. In regards to her getting a tattoo I would suggest the design idea that previous posters have mentioned but also put a caveat that she has to get the best available tattoo artist to complete it- they cost a fortune when done properly and in years to come even if she doesn't love the design as much as she did at this age she'll appreciate the art! My first tattoo looked like it was drawn by a child, cost £20 and took 10 minutes. My cover up looks like a painting, it's beautiful, cost £280 and took 3 hours. You get what you pay for when it comes to tattoos! And warn her that she'll never stop at one! I would also tell her to be wary of placement- think about her figure, the style of clothes she may wear and the sort of career she wants to pursue- as you can see from some of the posts on here- there is a stigma attached to visible tattoos for some reason!