Feeling so sad, my poor old boy seems to be nearing the end of his life

Dollardog

Someone sent me this.

When Is It Time?

by Kit McCallum

When is it time to say goodbye,
To all the love I've known,
When is it time to end your pain,
And leave me all alone?

I've watched you on your good days when
I feel your strength renewed;
But shortly after little ups,
The down days then ensue.

We ride this roller-coaster of
Emotions as we try,
To make it through another day,
And yet, I can't deny ...

That as I look into your face
On days that have been bad,
I see a look that beckons me
It's tired, and hurt, and sad.

The little spark I used to see
Behind those loving eyes,
Is growing ever clouded
By life's cruel inhumane side.

I try to see beyond the pain
You feel with every step;
And softly whisper to myself
This may get better yet.

If I can bear to watch you
Just another day or two;
I justify my reasons to
Ensure I cling to you.

For letting go is harder for
The person left behind;
It means that if I let you go,
I cannot turn back time.

Back to the days I long for now,
When you were full of life;
And every day held promise,
And our futures, clear and bright.

But now the lights are darkening ...
We take it daily now;
I cannot see our futures clear
Or think beyond this cloud.

I think the hardest part in this
Is never knowing why,
I have to be courageous
And I have to say goodbye.

For if I let myself admit
It's time to let you go;
I'd have to face reality
Without you ... but I know ...

That soon I have to face the
Final outcome that I dread,
And holding on will only serve
To hurt you in the end.

You've given such unselfish love
For all our time in life,
But if I hold too tightly,
You'll not move t'ward the light ...

On to a better life, where you
Can once again be free,
Of all the pain and discomfort
That holds you here to me.

So if I find the courage just to say
This last farewell,
I hope you will forgive me for
The time it took me; still ...

I'll hold with me, the memories
That in my heart remain,
Pray one day, down the road a'ways
... They'll lesson my own pain.

Spirit_2

It is understandable that you feel sad.

From experience sometimes you have to love them enough to let them go.

roxy13

Its so sad that we have to watch our pets grown old and ill before us. What an awful situation. I have been there before and know it is the hardest thing in the world. Im so sorry your little man is not well. They break your heart in the end. But......we put up with it because of the joy they give us when they are here and well.
I have never known life without a cat in it. My last two were 20 when they were pts but they had a wonderful life. I know its so difficult at a time like this but sometimes thinking back to how much they have enjoyed being with you can help a bit.

Massive hugs!! Please remember that you have given him a lovely good life and that he now needs you to be strong for him x

Westywoodpecker

jackieblack wrote: »

I just need to share with someone who might understand how I'm feeling.

He just didn't seem to be himself, he looked like he felt rubbish and he looked sad.

My head knows it's the kindest thing to do, I know he's had a good life with us and he's been well looked after. He chose us in the first place, and he chose to stay with us for more than 18 years (and two house moves) so I like to think he's been happy. I know 19 is a good age and that no-one is immortal.

My head knows that I know I'll 'come to terms' with it, because I have to.
Not making my broken heart feel any easier at the moment though........

You already know what is the kindest thing to do, it's just a very hard & brave decision to come to. You have to think what's best for him & not you now. 19 years is a very good age & you are indeed special if he choose to live with you!

My heart goes out to you, its very hard but the memories over the years you have had him will make it a bit easier with time.

Thinking of you x


(Dollerdog, okay I'll admit that did make me cry)

mum2one

I just wanted to send my best wishes, it sounds like he's trying to give you an extra hug to say "I love you", I know its hard to let go, I was 18 when I had to have my cat PTS it was the hardest decision ever, same as it has been when we've lost the dogs.

When we lost our beloved Whisky, (last dog) my daughter was only 8 and had never been without a dog, she took it bad as we all did, but we reminded her how much love she gave him, that he was now pain free, running and chewing bones. We had his ashes brought home with the intention to sprinkle them in his fav places, but we can't part with them.

we ended up with a puppy, whos now a 3 yr old very spolit pooch, whos loved as equally, but remember the cat choose you, he's had an amazing life, and the love you've given him, that will last forever xx

jackieblack

Thank you all for your kind words.

He doesn't appear to have responded to the steroid injection, there's been no real improvement in the last 36 hours.

I forgot to put in my first post that he also has very wobbly back legs due to the arthritis in his spine and the vet thinks there may be some nerve damage. He has got much wobblier in the last couple of days probably because he's not really eating or drinking and, therefore, I presume getting weaker.

Have rung the vet this morning. Taking him this afternoon.
I know this is the kindest thing for him.

Froglet

So so sorry,my heart aches for you and all those facing this.You have given him 19 years of happiness,love,and all the things every animal deserves but many don't get.You should be proud.

Similar to dollars post,this is from an animals perspective.

If it should be that I Grow Weak

If it should be that I grow weak,
And pain should keep me from my sleep
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand;
Don't let your grief then stay your hand
For this day more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years,
What is to come holds no fears,
You'd not want me to suffer so,
The time has come to let me go.

Take me where my needs they'll tend,
And please stay with me until the end,
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see,
The kindness that you did for me,
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve, it must be you,
Who had this painful thing to do,
We've been so close, we two these years,

don't let your heart hold back its tears

chris_n_tj

Thinking of you all today xxxx

Horseunderwater

jackieblack wrote: »

I just need to share with someone who might understand how I'm feeling.

Took my beautiful cat to the V.E.T. yesterday as he hasn't been himself for a few days..............

We think he's 19, he was a stray who adopted us more than 18 years ago and, like any old man, he's developed a few problems over the last few years, but he's been eating ok ( until a few days ago) and seemed happy/content.

......

We had to take our old Gal Puss to the Vet to be PTS late one Thursday night about 10 days or so back. She had been in a similar way to your puss - she was wobbly - off her food - not peeing much - and wanted to be with us all the time for cuddles. I was all set to ring up the next day as I knew the time was near for her. We'd had her from 11 years old from a rescue place. She was a few weeks shy of 18. But that night she had a massive internal bleed - hence we needed to do it quickly. Her name was Guzzy - but we called her grumpuss mumpuss as she would make a sort of grump if you stroked her or fussed her. So I really do understand. A big hug to you and yours. Our other cat still keeps wondering why the boss is not around to clout him on the nose as he was very fond of her, but when she wanted space she'd let him no.

atrixblue.-MFR-.

my felix was pts last year i feel for you he was 8 years old.
he had had an abcess in his cheek wich was unknown to us at the time we didnt feel anything there TBH, one early morning about 3AM i got up to have a pee and he was snugged up on the landing asleep, i finished up in the bathroom and saw him turn over and shake his head nothing unusual i stepped past him he looked at me also tried to paw my foot to trip me over (his cat joke), i got in the bedroom and a almighty comossion was coming from the landing, i thought tinkerbell decided to attack him i run out to the landing where he was rolling around with both paws around his face and shaking his head with his tongue out, there was blood all over the floor wall and ceiling with a big patch of puss where he had put his head down to sleep again after i passed him, i quickly picked him up and to my horror he had a hole the size of a 10p peice in his cheek, i picked him up, wrapped him up in a towel the wife came out and took hold of him and i went to get some clean warm water cotton balls and buds and some antiseptic spray to clean the wound out, we sat on the bed with him and he let me clean out the wound, it was down to the bone and some of the abcess was still present wich i coaxed out with a bud and antiseptic, some of the sack came out with this small fatty looking ball about the size of a drawing pin wich i snipped with clean paif of scissors, i took him to the vets in the morning, and they stitched his cheek up they also removed the glands from his cheek as they were infected also from the puss, he came home and started to make a full recovery, 4 weeks later, the wound reopened more puss started coming, rushed to the vets again and this time, there were lumps under his legs (he never allowed anyone to touch his underside), he has also developed authritis from an injury to his pelvic bones when he was about 5 (some moron kicked him in the back), the vet took a look at them and they were tumours, he had cancer, i took the decision there and then to have him PTS, the rupturing abcess was a sign that spread of cancer was rapid he would have only had weeks to live while more abcesses burst, his organs shut down etc so i couldnt put him through that. he sleeps now in my garden in his favourate resting place.

OP my thoughts go out to you.